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(Message started by: jadedgazer on Dec 19th, 2003, 8:59am)

Title: Ways to alleviate Holiday Stress?
Post by jadedgazer on Dec 19th, 2003, 8:59am
I could use some suggestions on how to ease some Holiday stress. This year just seems terribly stressful for me and it is making my battle with the beast harder than ever.

The ex-wife (she and I usually get along) is driving me insane! Her son lives with me and has for over 7 years. We won't go into that or how I feel about it... But she bought him a drum set about a year ago under the conditions that it stayed at her house. Then she moves into a smaller apt. and without so much as a word brings it here. SO now we have a drum set in the house. The boy is heading off to college in a year, but she can't buy him appropriate gifts that are going to benefit him down the road. She buys new drum heads and new cymbals. Like that is going to help me. ARRGH! She is supposed to come get him tomorrow for the vacation, but then tells me she might show up tonight. We have never had a problem with her staying here when we can get her to pick our son up, but we do like to know for certain when she is coming. It is a 3 hour drive one way for her to actually come down here. (Of course when we take him down we do it in one day, but that is us, so it is ok) Common courtesy, right? She is just really stressing me and I am really trying to keep my mouth shut. She is very inconsiderate of my CH and my husbands MS. We don't complain a lot, we don't ask for a lot. But when neither of us are doing well, is it too much to ask for a little consideration and respect?

This situation on top of no money, other company coming next week, a deadline on the paper and the beast raging is really causing havoc for me. I am getting hit so hard. 6 or 7 times a day, Kip 6-9, sleeping about 3 hours a night. I am trying to be pleasant, really I am, but I feel like I am going to blow-up at any moment.

Any ideas on how I can diffuse this within myself to keep the peace? I am at a loss here. This is not worth making myself worse over, I keep trying to remind myself of that. Should I just throttle her? LOL

Thanks for allowing me to let off a little steam, this in itself has helped a little. :) Don't know what I would do without you guys!

Merry Christmas to you all!

Title: Re: Ways to alleviate Holiday Stress?
Post by thomas on Dec 19th, 2003, 9:08am
Take a deep breath, and be thankfull that you're a much more responsible and thoughtfull person than she is.  Pitty her her shortcomings and see if that helps, if not find a pillow and scream into really hard. ;)

Title: Re: Ways to alleviate Holiday Stress?
Post by aprilbee on Dec 19th, 2003, 9:14am
you did the first thing I would do and that is vent to an uninvolved party with no opinion on the situation so that you don't find youself defending the person whose driving you nuts!

If it is really that bad, have you considered just having a talk with her?  Let  her know how bad it is for  you and your husband right now.  Sometimes people just don't realize what they're doing, because you're putting on a good front she has no idea what she's doing.  Try just talking to her, I bet you'll feel a heck of a lot better and I bet she understands 100%.

Good luck sweetie and here's vibes for PFDAN!  ;)

Title: Re: Ways to alleviate Holiday Stress?
Post by Paigelle on Dec 19th, 2003, 10:07am
You should get a good hot cup of tea, a wonderful book or magazine and some good music.  Sit in a comfy chair and chill out.  Tell everyone to leave you alone.

After I had my son, my Dr wrote me a prescription that said "20-30 minutes of alone time per day.  Relaxation is vital as this may cause drowsiness."  Best prescription I ever had.

Title: Re: Ways to alleviate Holiday Stress?
Post by jadedgazer on Dec 19th, 2003, 10:11am
Thanks ever so much! Just venting has relieved my stress quite a bit and my poor hubby didn't have to listen to it. He is relieved without even knowing it. LOL

I am going to clean house, suck O2 when I need it and chill today. Oh and wrap some gifts. That should make me feel a little better.

Tomorrow is another day...one day at a time right? Moment by moment.

Title: Re: Ways to alleviate Holiday Stress?
Post by gmlevenhagen on Dec 19th, 2003, 11:15am
Let's see ways to alleviate holiday stress.....

Wear antlers and a blinking nose and then go shopping, every once in awhile stop and ask somebody if they have seen a big fat guy dressed in red, cause if the boss caught you shopping during working hours he would just kill ya..... ;;D

Gena

P.S. this is even better if you take your sons along....

Title: Re: Ways to alleviate Holiday Stress?
Post by Tiannia on Dec 19th, 2003, 1:52pm
Make some tea...  Laugh at least 5 times a day. Even if that means coming here and looking at the really bad jokes that are listed on this message board...  Go to your husband and get at least 3 hugs a day...  One last thing... Take a "time out" whenever YOU NEED IT...

Those 4 things make life much easier to deal with in my house.



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