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Topic: So much pain... So much sadness... (Read 853 times) |
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Jeepgun
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So much pain... So much sadness...
« on: Dec 31st, 2004, 1:35pm » |
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I've been quiet for a while, and I've been thumbing through the various threads and reading... I hope no one will interpret my silence as a lack of care. Quite the opposite. So much pain and sadness, and I find that I'm just... out of words, or maybe it's just that words seem so cheap and remote... Like how many times can I say, "Hey, hang in there. Vibes! You're going to be okay..." before it begins to ring hollow and glib?
*long sigh*
I just love you all and care for you, and my heart breaks for the things that you are going through, both with cluster headaches and in your various family situations and health concerns.
I am just out of words.... (I can hear some of you breathing a sigh of relief at that!) 
The only eloquence I can muster at this point, is tears... Shit, NOTHING makes me cry, but since being here, I've become a regular crybaby. *sigh*
My very best wishes to each one of you, your families, your supporters... A better, happier, brighter, more loving, more prosperous, less painful New Year to each and every one of you...
Love, Peace, Strength, and Blessings,
-Frank
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nani
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #1 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 1:57pm » |
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 Thank you Frank. Let's remember, though, that even with all the pain and sadness...we've also had some good times, good support, and a lot of laughs. That's what makes me love all of you so much...
Through all the pain, all the bullshit with families and doctors, everyone here has the courage and strength to face it all with a smile and a chuckle. The silver lining in suffering so intensely, is the ability to feel joy and happiness and compassion more intensely as well.
It' like kimmie said:
Quote:| I want you to know that it is NEVER going to be easy no matter what is wrong in your life. But i want to tell you that if you dig deep and do not cave in on your own self and situation, you will receive the most cherished gifts = they will just be inside you |
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Happy New Year my sisters and brothers...I love you all.
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Langa
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #2 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 2:47pm » |
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Frank, if this board has taught me anything is that we don't even need to say anything...everyone just knows in their heart we're there for one another and we feel each other's pain. It makes me proud to be a clusterhead. 
Happy New Years filled with Blessings to everyone in Clusterville!
Langa
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eddie
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #3 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 3:09pm » |
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frank even when you think your out of words
you still find the words some where bro
this family here has helped me so much
for that im forever in debt
THANKS TO ALL OF YOU
EDDIE
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Charlie
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #4 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 4:02pm » |
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Geezus Frank:
We have to set a limit on your prose and poetry. You make the rest of us look bad. Only Kim can compete. 
Charlie
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Carl_D
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #5 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 4:40pm » |
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I know how you feel bro. I know how you feel.
Let's hope this next year is better for all of us.
Peace & love,
Carl D
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Ree
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #6 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 4:49pm » |
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on Dec 31st, 2004, 1:35pm, Jeepgun wrote:I've been quiet for a while, and I've been thumbing through the various threads and reading... I hope no one will interpret my silence as a lack of care. Quite the opposite. So much pain and sadness, and I find that I'm just... out of words, or maybe it's just that words seem so cheap and remote... Like how many times can I say, "Hey, hang in there. Vibes! You're going to be okay..." before it begins to ring hollow and glib?
*long sigh*
I just love you all and care for you, and my heart breaks for the things that you are going through, both with cluster headaches and in your various family situations and health concerns.
I am just out of words.... (I can hear some of you breathing a sigh of relief at that!)
The only eloquence I can muster at this point, is tears... Shit, NOTHING makes me cry, but since being here, I've become a regular crybaby. *sigh*
My very best wishes to each one of you, your families, your supporters... A better, happier, brighter, more loving, more prosperous, less painful New Year to each and every one of you...
Love, Peace, Strength, and Blessings,
-Frank |
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Frank~~~ don't panic this is something that happens to you once you have truly become family. It isnt anything that hasnt happened to many of us old timers here. Its ok to take a break and BE just BE... remember there are alot of shoulders here. Holidays also render up some useless feelings in some so don't interpret anything until after the first of the year... Thinking about ya kid... you'll get through this... yes it is sad and at times we all don't know exactly what to say. It is ok not to have the answers... When someone hurts say sorry... When someone crys just say I hear you... God bless and Love... Ree
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becky8
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #7 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 4:55pm » |
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Frank,
Its funny cause I have been feeling that way myself. I have been reading but not posting much.
You know hon, if you're feelin sad I care. I know for guys its kinda like its all about having fun but it really IS OKAY to just feel like crap and you don't need to take any teasing about it! I love you too!
You are truly special ..........Just remember SPECIAL!!!
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Jeepgun
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #8 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 6:07pm » |
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Thank you... More than words can ever convey... Thank you.
Love,
-Frank
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don
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #9 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 6:10pm » |
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Frank, when you are out of words just remember there is always
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kimh
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #10 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 6:16pm » |
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Yeah, Frank and after you read the YOU SUCK sign remember to STFU.
Life is short poopsie lovey and i am out of poetry 
Truth is - we ARE the poetry.
Proud NUMBSKULL.
PS: And after you have read the YOU SUCK sign and been told to STFU you BETTER not be posting disgusting and hilarious posts when a clusterbud is tryin ta sit and have a freakin cup of cawfee without fucking up my keyboard 
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| « Last Edit: Dec 31st, 2004, 6:19pm by kimh » |
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Ruth
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #11 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 7:03pm » |
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Happy New Year Frank,
I no how you feel
Sometimes your up and sometimes your down, but still around. Right!
Love ya
Ruby tuesday(Ruth)
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Leesa
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #12 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 7:37pm » |
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When you say nothing at all we still know your here with us. We know you care hun. Its all good. Just rem. that!! If ya dont Ill come kick your ass!!
PF wishes & love, Leesa
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Tim_Z
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #13 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 7:42pm » |
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I try to live enoying my life and laughing whenever I can. I know my time here is going to be brief even if I lived to be 100, it is going fast. I know when I am in the depths of a cycle it just seems so hopeless. It may not seem like it but you are a lot stronger than you think. You have many people that are here for you.
Hang in there Frank. Better days are coming. I'll stop rambling now. We are here for you Frank.
Tim
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the_old_man
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #14 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 8:46pm » |
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Hey Frank,
I haven't been here very long and I don't really know you, but I know how you feel. I tend to lurk more than post. I'm in the longest, most painful cycle in 27 years, and I'm tired. I'm tired of going to bed each nite knowing in 90 minutes I'll be up and pacing...fighting off the beast. I'm tired of going back to bed only to have it happen again in 90 minutes and again in another 90. I'm tired of the excruciating pain. I'm tired of the interrupted life. I'm tired of not being able to function normally. I'm tired of not being able to do the things that "normal" people take for granted. I'm tired of not being there for my family because I've got a "headache". I'm tired of trying to find the strength to go on. I'm tired of being weak. And when I'm at my lowest point,out of the blue, my wife says to me..."I don't know where you get your strength. You're the strongest man I know. If I have one bad nite's sleep, I can't function the next day. You've had 9 weeks without a good nite's sleep, and yet you still get up every morning. You still go to work for 10 hours a day. You still do your job. You still come home every nite and you're here for me and the kids. Do you have any idea how comforting that is for me? You are an amazing man, and I love you very much, and I thank God for you every day. Thank you for being here." See Frank, she knows what I'm going through, what it costs me, and that I'll never give up. I have a job to do and I'll do it. The people on this board are like my wife. We all know what you're going through and we love and respect you for it. You have a job to do, to be here and help others that need to draw from your strength. You do it with humor, with poetry, with other writings, with wisdom and compassion. You do your job. Don't think it's not appreciated. Don't think it doesn't make a difference. There are countless clusterheads here that stay around or just pass through that have been touched and encouraged by you. You're tired and you're at a low spot, but if we didn't have the lows, we would never be able to appreciate the highs. Hang in there Frank. Better days are coming. And thank you for being here.
The Old Man
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Redneck
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #15 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 9:22pm » |
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Sometimes silence speaks loudest. Everyone has to step back and listen within everynow and then.
Be well Bro!
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MrsLadyElaine
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #16 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 10:14pm » |
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You know what you have a big heart Frank.
Sometimes here we laugh our ass off for days. Then there are weeks we cry ! Thats life and the way good friends are . Caring about each other
You don'talwayshave to post to show you care we know you care.
Big Hug
E
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| « Last Edit: Dec 31st, 2004, 10:17pm by MrsLadyElaine » |
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AlienSpaceBabe
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #17 on: Dec 31st, 2004, 11:48pm » |
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Give when you can....
Take when you need to.....
We'll ALWAYS be here for you.....
HUG
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vig
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #18 on: Jan 1st, 2005, 12:49am » |
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Stay Strong Frank,
We need you around here.
-p
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Lizzie2
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #19 on: Jan 1st, 2005, 12:53am » |
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{{{{Frank}}}} You know how much this family cares about each other and loves each other.
I wouldn' havemade it this far wihtout the peoplehere like you and many otherswho make us laugh when we need it, and also you can sometimes be just there for someone.
That isa relly big deal! Not everyone is a good listener, and it is definitely a practiced skill!
Send me a PM with your phone number, and I will try to call from this fun place. I have a calling card, so it's probably easier if I just call you than having you call me. Sometimes all you need is a friendly voice on the other end of the line.
Please know how much we all care about you!
Luv and hugz,
Carrie/Lizzie2
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Jeepgun
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Re: So much pain... So much sadness...
« Reply #20 on: Jan 1st, 2005, 12:43pm » |
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Thank you again everyone, for your wisdom, compassion, and kindness. I feel quite honored, now that I've been told that I suck, by the King Of Suck himself: Don.
Damn, I sure love this family... I think I got something in my eye though, 'cause the screen is getting a little blurry....
It's all joy....
Thank you again.
Love,
-Frank
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