Clusterheadaches.com Message Board (http://www.clusterheadaches.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.cgi)
New Message Board Archives >> 2005 General Board Posts >> Married.......
(Message started by: BarbaraD on Dec 29th, 2005, 8:03am)

Title: Married.......
Post by BarbaraD on Dec 29th, 2005, 8:03am


A couple had only been married for two weeks the husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.  So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."

Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.
"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face.  I'm going to have a beer."

The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?"  She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries:  Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop... but at the bar…you know... they have frozen glasses... "

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?"  She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.
 
The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious... I won't be long.  I'll be right back.  I promise. OK?"
 
"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?"  She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres:  chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, and pork strips.
 
"But my sweet honey... at the bar. you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."

"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?  LISTEN UP CHICKEN SHIT!  SIT YOUR ASS DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR BEER IN YOUR FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A DAMNED BAR!  THAT SHIT IS OVER, GOT IT, JACKASS?" and, they lived happily ever after. Isn't that a sweet story?

Hugs BD

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Sandy_C on Dec 29th, 2005, 8:14am
[smiley=crackup.gif] [smiley=crackup.gif] [smiley=crackup.gif]

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by aprilbee on Dec 29th, 2005, 8:59am
Poor guy... :(  

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Jimi on Dec 29th, 2005, 9:00am
;;D Yes it is Honey Bunny.

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by LeLimey on Dec 29th, 2005, 9:02am
hey girls, its nice to see Jimi is learning isn't it?!  ;)

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by zwibbs/Scott on Dec 29th, 2005, 9:19am
Great Story---but I got hungry reading it !

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Melissa on Dec 29th, 2005, 9:41am
;;D [smiley=thumb.gif]

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by maffumatt on Dec 29th, 2005, 10:02am
ain't that the truth...........

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Ghost on Dec 29th, 2005, 10:50am
I keep saying it aint a marrage license its freak ownership papers!!!! [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif] ;;D

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by TomM on Dec 29th, 2005, 10:56am
...only 4 Hors D'Oeuvres  listed...where's the 5th one, Pumpkin?  

Oh, I prefer a frozen mug, Butter Cup. ;;D
TomM

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by cynjeep89 on Dec 29th, 2005, 4:28pm
They were only married two weeks.....give it a year and she will probably be driving him to the bar herself just to have some time alone!!!

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Guiseppi on Dec 29th, 2005, 4:57pm
Man is not complete until he's married........then he's finished....<<<<(23 years finished!!!!)

Guiseppi

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Ree on Dec 29th, 2005, 7:01pm
LOL Guiseppe..... you are so right......

Barb D that is one funny joke..... i loved it.....love ree

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Phil L on Dec 29th, 2005, 8:43pm
Thought that was pretty funny myself. Until I realized that I've been married twice and for dinner tonight I'm having boiled pasta and bread. Perhaps there's a message here somewhere.

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Charlie on Dec 30th, 2005, 1:24am
Tis' a sad state of affairs...... http://www.netsync.net/users/charlies/gifs/yesmiss01a.gif

Charlie http://www.netsync.net/users/charlies/gifs/dead.gif

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by TomM on Dec 30th, 2005, 8:42am

on 12/30/05 at 01:24:17, Charlie wrote:
Tis' a sad state of affairs...... http://www.netsync.net/users/charlies/gifs/yesmiss01a.gif

Charlie http://www.netsync.net/users/charlies/gifs/dead.gif


Charlie, you kill me.
TomM

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Kevin_M on Dec 30th, 2005, 5:34pm

on 12/29/05 at 08:03:53, BarbaraD wrote:
"Honey, I'll be right back."

I'm going to have a beer."

... they have frozen glasses... "

I won't be long.  I'll be right back.  I promise. OK?"
 

"But my sweet honey... at the bar. you know there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."


THAT SHIT IS OVER,  



I think we know the definition of "is" now.    ;)


"I did not have any tall neck Becks with that woman."





Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Jasmyn on Dec 30th, 2005, 7:25pm
Barbara it IS funny and Kevin you just pointed out that men are natural born liars [smiley=laugh.gif]

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Cerberus on Dec 30th, 2005, 9:35pm
And the clicking sound she heard in the wee hours of the morning was NOT the phone reciever nor the doorknob... [smiley=huh.gif]

  [smiley=bigguns.gif]

'Bus

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by nancyc on Dec 31st, 2005, 12:52am
Damn, sis...i thought you had really messed up when I saw the heading for your post...Wheeeee, glad to know you are still single..LMAO. smiles,nancyc ;;D

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by sandie99 on Dec 31st, 2005, 6:49am
;;D ;;D ;;D ;;D ;;D

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by BobG on Dec 31st, 2005, 1:02pm

on 12/30/05 at 19:25:04, Jasmyn wrote:
Barbara it IS funny and Kevin you just pointed out that men are natural born liars [smiley=laugh.gif]

Nope. We learn it from our dad's girlfriend.

Title: Re: Married.......
Post by Langa on Jan 1st, 2008, 3:21pm
This was great...the sweet nicknames had me dying...coochy coo?  Lollipop? Tootsie Roll?  Oh man...those were good.   [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif] [smiley=laugh.gif]

Langa



Clusterheadaches.com Message Board » Powered by YaBB 1 Gold - SP 1.3.1!
YaBB © 2000-2003. All Rights Reserved.