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   Author  Topic: Lee's death is reality check 4 me  (Read 934 times)
crftymom
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Lee's death is reality check 4 me
« on: Oct 8th, 2006, 2:45pm »
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Ok.  I have heard of CH being called the suicide headache.  But I have yet until today personally heard of someone actually killing themselves to end the pain.  I didn't know Lee.  Never talked to him.  But I am completely freaked out.  I have lost a few friends to suicide, and that was hard.  But to think that what ails my 7 year old son could cause him so much pain that one day this could be a reality to him, scares me to death.  I don't really know what I am wanting here.  I just know that I am not the only supporter out there who has to feel this way after hearing about this.  
 
I guess knowing that if Dawson follows the same cycle as last year we are approaching it way too fast.  And the fact that he is so young and I have no clue what to do, makes me feel as if I won't be able to help him enough.  And I want to do anything possible for him.  I never want him to consider this path as an answer.  Well I have vented enough for now.
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maffumatt
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Re: Lee's death is reality check 4 me
« Reply #1 on: Oct 8th, 2006, 2:59pm »
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Just be there for him....I don't know what else to say.
Matt
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Re: Lee's death is reality check 4 me
« Reply #2 on: Oct 8th, 2006, 4:31pm »
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I was so stunned last night by this saddest news that I sat here motionless with tears streaming down my face for a while then I just had to switch off the computer and went for a walk. When I came back I gave my DH a great big hug and thank God that he is alright.
 
All we can do as supporters is to be there for your loved ones, making sure they know they can always count on us and that we are coping fine.  
 
Become educated ourselves as much as possible about the condition so that we can anticipate any change, any difficulty and to be able to understand.
 
Encourage your son to come and talk to you . Encourage him to vent anytime about anything that bugs him no matter how little. Teach him that its alright to show emotions and to talk about them. Suicide tends to come when pain both physically and emotionally build up too much over time.
 
Take care, hugs and lots of love to you and Dawson.
 
Pray to the Lord to help giving us all the strength to give as much love as needed.
 
Annette
« Last Edit: Oct 8th, 2006, 4:44pm by BB » IP Logged
BlaineD
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Re: Lee's death is reality check 4 me
« Reply #3 on: Oct 8th, 2006, 5:32pm »
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Very well said Annette, I couldn't put it better myself.  But something that I found effective was telling my CHer everyday that I love her.  Just showing your son that you love him with all of your heart, will mean the world to him and hopefully steer him clear of going down the suicide path.  And by you coming on here and telling us your problems, makes me see the love that you have for your son. So just make sure he knows it as well.
 
Hugs, and pain free wishes
 
Blaine
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Margi
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Re: Lee's death is reality check 4 me
« Reply #4 on: Oct 10th, 2006, 10:29am »
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Very well said, Annette.
 
I knew Lee and I was deeply saddened by the news of his passing.  And I was very angry at him, too.  Angry for doing this to himself, to his family, to all of us.  
 
Lee had a lot of other issues going on than CH, though - I believe he had suffered a stroke and, if I remember correctly, was diagnosed with a terminal liver or kidney condition (I could be wrong on the exact ailment, but I do know that he posted last year that there was something else going on.)  
 
I pray for peace for Lee's soul and that he will be forgiven for his final act.  I also pray that no clusterhead out there will see his actions as a solution to their pain, though.  I don't mean this to sound callous or uncaring but, honestly - THAT thought saddens me more.
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Re: Lee's death is reality check 4 me
« Reply #5 on: Oct 17th, 2006, 10:17pm »
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Well, I didn't know Lee either but my heart goes out to his family. And no Crftymom, you are not alone in your worries. Everytime my hubby gets a bad one, and tells me he can't take it anymore, I worry. Especially when I'm not home when it happens, I'm petrified about what I may come home to. I like to think he won't do anything drastic but I know these headaches put him in a totally different frame of mind.  
 
Anyway, know that you are not alone and that this site is a great source of support.
 
Thanks to everyone for listening to us vent!
 
Much luv
Tracy
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