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Supporter's Corner >> Supporter's Corner >> last straw
(Message started by: mawmaw on Feb 2nd, 2005, 12:38am)

Title: last straw
Post by mawmaw on Feb 2nd, 2005, 12:38am
I have run out of gas. I always thought that I was a strong person and could handle almost anything. I have finally met my breaking point. Let's see now, my husband has CH, Copd,Sleep apnea,and his left leg amputated at the knee,we were raising two of our grandchildren,and worrying about the safety of thier two brothers. Now my drug addicted daughter and son in law have taken the two that we have had for almost two years, because I finally had to go to the state for some help. I couldn't continue to raise two childern without the help financially. When their parents got word that they would have to pay back the state for the money and medicaid that I was receiving for their kids they came and got them. On top of that said that they were going to see us in court for applying for aid. They have made no attempt to help my husband and myself fiancially with the kids. Having those two boys here was hard on my husband but it gave him something to help keep him going each day. He is now so far down in depression and anger that I walk on eggshells in my home for fear of an explosion from him. I know that the pain in his head is awful. but the apin in his heart is bad in its own way. He is my second husband and he has been more of a dad to my three children than their biological father ever was. Seems like that all three have done things that I wish they never would have thought but we have tried really hard to be supportive. My heart is breaking knowing that two young boys are going back into a situation that is less than desirable and the Great Commonwealth of Virginia could care less. We tried hard to get custody of the kids but when people don't respond to supenoas it makes it hard to prove your case.
On top of all of the other problems the company I work for has changed ownership and I have had to fight with the new insurance company to get meds for my husband. I'm not even sure what kind of schedule I will be working. Tension at work, tension at home and all I want to do is disappear.
I know that this is a long rambling post and I am sorry. I felt that if I did not let some of this out i would explode.
I am going to bed now and hope that the meds I take for fibromialgia work tonite so I can get some sleep. Thankyou
Cindy

Title: Re: last straw
Post by Margi on Feb 2nd, 2005, 9:44am
Cindy, my heart aches for you.  Please know that you are in my prayers and I'm sending you strength to get through this.  You're an awesome supporter and I know you'll be able to reach down deep into that bottomless well you have of courage and patience.  One day at a time, right?  

Always here if you'd rather talk privately - my email is moxie_miss@hotmail.com

BIG hugs and love,
Margi

Title: Re: last straw
Post by Jackie on Feb 2nd, 2005, 10:20am
Cindy...

I can't add much to what Margi has already said.....she's good.

Wishing you strength to get through this.....it's a tough road.

Bless your heart,

Jacks 8)

Title: Re: last straw
Post by BonnieW on Feb 2nd, 2005, 3:07pm
Awe Cindy - I feel like Margi - just wish that I could help you in some way.  But do know that we are here to listen and support - and saying prayers for you and your husband.  Hang in there!

Bonnie

Title: Re: last straw
Post by miapet on Feb 2nd, 2005, 4:34pm
big hugs Cindy . . . .if you i.m. me your number, I'll be happy to call you . .whenever is convenient for you . . .save you the price of the call that way *HUGS* we're thinking of you!
*positive light and energy*
D & miapet

Title: Re: last straw
Post by mawmaw on Feb 2nd, 2005, 6:15pm
Thank you dear people for caring. I am trying to get myself together and mostly for the grandkids sake.  It is lonely in our house now without them there even though it was hard for my husband and myself. At least when they were with us we knew that they were getting fed , help with homework and bathes. Those children need vibes more than I. My 8 year old grandson is probably back to taking care of the rest of the kids again. My heart feels like it has been ripped out and stomped on. I keep asking myself why after three different social service offices have seen the trash that they live in and read the number of times the cops have been called on my daughter and son-in-law for fighting that  they still insist that this is a fit way to raise children.
Many huggs to you all,
Cindy

Title: Re: last straw
Post by LeLimey on Feb 2nd, 2005, 6:18pm
Oh Cindy, I've been watching for posts from you all day, I've been so worried. Keep us all up to date, I'm realy going to worry if ~I mkiss seeing you for a few days
(HUG)
Helen

Title: Re: last straw
Post by Woobie on Feb 2nd, 2005, 8:45pm
[smiley=hug.gif]

Title: Re: last straw
Post by LadyK-9 on Feb 2nd, 2005, 10:58pm
You sound like a wonderful person. I'm sorry to hear that you have worked so hard to make a difference in those kids lives only to have them taken from you. Hopefully one way or another,  you have made that difference and will have more opportunities to help them in the future. I am also sorry to hear that you are going through such a hard time right now but you seem very strong so I know that you can get through it. Hang in there.

Jeanette

Title: Re: last straw
Post by WifeofCHSuffer on Feb 4th, 2005, 1:53pm
What a horrible situation to be in.  Here you are helping out family and all that your child can do is rip the thing that brings you happiness.  I hope social services looks at this case more closely and you can get them back and get some money into your home to raise those children in a stable environment.  

I am thinking of you and sending you P&PT for this situation.

Cathy

Title: Re: last straw
Post by Giovanni on Feb 9th, 2005, 7:32pm
So sorry Cindy.  Gee........

Social services sounds like a joke from your description.  Anyway to perhaps get legal aid to help you out with the issues concerning the kids?

http://www.vlas.org/

If either of the parents are on supervised probation, the probation officer should be of help in this situation.

I'm thinking of you and Butch,

John

Title: Re: last straw
Post by Leesa on Mar 7th, 2005, 3:55pm
Cindy all I can say is we are here for ya hun. We are all sending out vibes and prayers for ya that things turn around for you. Keep us posted and rem. TAKE CARE OF YOU!!!!
TN size hugs to you hun.
Leesa  :(

Title: Re: last straw
Post by Gator on Mar 9th, 2005, 3:08pm
It's sad the way some people take advantage for as long as they can and then turn on the very people that have been helping them.  It's even more disheartening when those people are our children.  It's so dificult for a parent to go against their own children and the children know this.  Maybe a court case would be a good thing in this case.  I don't know.  My heart goes out to you and I am hoping for better times soon for you, your husband and most especially the children.

I also want to thank you for being such a great supporter for your husband.  As a clusterhead myself, I know how much it means to him to have you around.  

Please remember to take care of yourself.  There are plenty of ears here to bend and lots of strong shoulders to cry on.  


Title: Re: last straw
Post by mawmaw on Jul 8th, 2005, 2:29am
Hi. It's me again. Don't mean to post only the bad stuff. I couldn't sleep tonite. Today was a really bad day for my husband.I wish that these darn headaches would go away and stay away.HE HAS ENOUGH OTHER HEALTH PROBLEMS. He got a little bit of a break and we though that it might be gone for a while,but the beast came back with a vengance. The neuro thinks that because my husbands oxygen concentrator was not putting out right, that may have triggered the headaches back. The stupid company we rent the machine from was suppose to service it in March. No one showed up until May and it was only putting out 45% oxygen,not 99% like it's suppose to. Sure wish the jerk who was suppose to come in March could walk a mile in my husbands shoes. I bet he wouldn't be late again.
My grandkids are all doing well. The parents have stopped using meth, at least for now. Social Services finally took some action and it hit home to them that they would lose their kids for good if they didn't take the help offered them. The judge is monitoring the case closely and piss test are given randomly. Both of the boys in school passed to the next grade and we are so proud of them.
Thanks for the place to unload. You all are good people.
Cindy

Title: Re: last straw
Post by nani on Jul 8th, 2005, 10:03am
Hi Cindy! It's always good to hear from you. I'm sorry your hubby is getting slammed again. That really sucks.  >:(  Hopefully you'll get the O2 issue squared away soon. I'm thrilled to hear that the grandbabies are OK and their parent's are pulling it together. What a relief for you!
Thanks for being such a great supporter and  Grandma. The world needs more good people like you.  :)  
Keep in touch, OK?    hugs, nani

Title: Re: last straw
Post by DennyM on Jul 16th, 2005, 1:16am
Cindy, you're an absolute Saint! I hope & pray that the day is not too far away when you'll look back on all this and draw strength fom the way you've coped.

Reckon I'd have nagged that O2 person to within an inch of his life - phoned him up four or five times a day to ask where the hell he was. He'd probably have come running just to get me off his back!

Never loose heart - there are lots of us thinking of you and your husband. You deserve every blessing that heaven can possibly send your way.

My prayers and Love

DennyM



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