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Supporter's Corner >> Supporter's Corner >> Our children as supporters
(Message started by: Margi on Mar 9th, 2006, 11:33am)

Title: Our children as supporters
Post by Margi on Mar 9th, 2006, 11:33am
This was sent to me by a sufferer, who wishes to remain anonymous, on the subject of clusterkids. I wholeheartedly agree with this - it sucks that they have to know about cluster at all.  


"That children write poetry
 On the hell we call clusters,
Goes to show what we knew
 That this world knows no justice.

They suffer themselves from this pain made in hell,
 Watching mummy, or daddy, wrestling the devil.
Suffer the little children whose minds are so young
 And so pure that they simply share in this evil.

No child should know this thing even exists,
 Allow them their innocence of fairies and pixies.
Protect them from this world 'til they're older and bolder,
 Let's not let them shoulder our pain and misery. "

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by mrs mac on Mar 9th, 2006, 6:22pm
margi, got tears in my eyes reading this!!!

only this morning our eldest (Andrew) said to Andy, "don't worry Dad, you'll feel better in a couple of days"

this is from a 12 year old boy, who has had to witness his dad fighting the beast far too many times (no matter how hard Andy tries to hide away, they both know what is going on!!!)

mrs mac xxx

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by Daddys_Devil on Mar 9th, 2006, 6:25pm
On the hell we call clusters,
life as we know it shows no mercy even to those who are young.
Goes to show what we knew
That this world knows no justice.
Who are you to say if it's okay to see the reality?
They suffer themselves from this pain made in hell,
Watching mummy, or daddy, wrestling the devil.
This pain that we are put us through shows us the way through life.
Suffer the little children whose minds are so young
And so pure that they simply share in this evil.
Isn't it ture that when the mind is young, its the best place to start?
No child should know this thing even exists,
If not in knowing then where is the truth?
Allow them their innocence of fairies and pixies.
Protect them from this world 'til they're older and bolder,
To sheild is to weaken the trust and if there is no trust then what?
Let's not let them shoulder our pain and misery. "
If not now then let them feel full force later on when their not ready,
leave them to rock unsteady under the weight and the pain?

I'm 14 and I believe that just because you don't understand something the way I do doesn't mean that the way I deal with it is wrong. I have migraines,I know pain, this is my way of dealing with it. My many poems posted here are both from veiwing and presonal demons. I live my life with this pain going through school, home issues, and many other things my class mates and friends could never dream of. They think I'm dark and depressed because I'm free to express my opion the way they won't. I don't care what others think of me or my writings because thats just me.  

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by GI JOEY on Mar 28th, 2006, 8:52pm
Children don't have to live in fear! ...EVER!  but do have to accept that what their parent is going through, is beyond ordinary!  Accepting something doesn't have to mean that you give in to it! Children of Clusterheads, as supporters, can learn a little about "unconditional love' by means of making Life a little easier for their parent.

If a parent describes to their child with fear, then the child will accept fear!
If a parent describes to their child with Love, then love and acceptance will be the only items that the child will remain with!   GUESS WHAT HAPPENS NEXT ?

... SUPPORT!   HA!  IT'S THAT SIMPLE!
-GI JOEY

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by Daddys_Devil on Mar 31st, 2006, 6:24pm
You have a good point but I have to ask. I just want to know your opion. what about the kids that aren't only supporters? What about those who suffer the brain busting pain themselves? Are they suppose to ignore these demonds? And even if they are supporters, then do you think it's right that even if a parent tells their child, the child should be kept away, unable to see what this hell looks like and how it affects their parents life? Put yourself in your shoes when you frist found out about your mom's clusters. Now imagen she never told you. How would that have affected your feelings about clusters? If you didn't know that your mom had clusters, and somebody told what they were, how would you reacted? I'm not arguing I just wanted to know.

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by GI JOEY on Apr 1st, 2006, 11:47pm
Children who suffer with CH themselves cannot ignore these demons as much as an adult couldn't.  The subject matter under this topic is concerned with children as supporters and whether or not they should be "sheilded" from what Mom or Dad is experiencing.  Your candid strength in your reply is highly plausible.  "I don't believe a child should be kept away or sheilded from a truth", and explaining to a child with Love will help a child to become a stronger individual/supporter.  I remember my first experience seeing my Mother during an attack.  I used the common sense and love that she taught me to ease her experience as much as I could!  A Child's strength is unbelievalbly fearless! ...Like yours!
Always the best,

GI JOEY

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by Yorky on Aug 5th, 2006, 1:49am

on 03/09/06 at 11:33:06, Margi wrote:
This was sent to me by a sufferer, who wishes to remain anonymous, on the subject of clusterkids. I wholeheartedly agree with this - it sucks that they have to know about cluster at all.  


"That children write poetry
 On the hell we call clusters,
Goes to show what we knew
 That this world knows no justice.

They suffer themselves from this pain made in hell,
 Watching mummy, or daddy, wrestling the devil.
Suffer the little children whose minds are so young
 And so pure that they simply share in this evil.

No child should know this thing even exists,
 Allow them their innocence of fairies and pixies.
Protect them from this world 'til they're older and bolder,
 Let's not let them shoulder our pain and misery. "
beutiful...(i hate being daddy)

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by Icey on Sep 6th, 2006, 1:19pm
Joey , I bet your mums so proud of you ! . I have an 11 yr old son and I wouldn't dream of keeping anything from him he knows about CH and why I use the meds and get upset and grumpy . When I'm having an attack he just asks do I need anything , water etc . Luckily he doesnt witness the night/early morning ones . It's not something I want him to have to see no way ! I do believe tho that you're stronger and calmer than us at times , Joey (( hugs )) from across the pond  :)

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by Linda_Howell on Sep 6th, 2006, 2:01pm


  Icy,

I am Joeys 'Mum'  and, yes... I AM very proud of him.

Our supporters are indeed calmer and stronger than us at times and that is why letting them know just how much they are appreciated on an on-going basis is so important.

Thank you Icy.

Linda

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by southwalessunshine on Aug 17th, 2007, 7:35pm
Wow!  This has been really humbling to read.  i wish you all luck and love in your struggles with CH.

I have 3 kids and when they know mum has gone upstairs as she has one of her heads, there  is a kind of time freeze and then they click into what they need to do.  my oldest girl is 14 and she gets the dinner on and sorts everyone out etc.  She can go from being a typical stroppy teen to super mum in seconds.  Even my 5 yr old has learned that he has to behave and listen to big sis when I have a head on.  
I'm lucky I have a great partner too but the way my kids deal with this never ceases to amaze me.  I feel guilty everyday that they have to live like this, although they never see me going through it as I lock myself in my room to hide it from them, they kinda know.  My kids and all you kids out there, we sufferers love how you're coping and supporting us.  Those kids out there who suffer with the pain too, I am so sorry that you have to deal with this and all i can personally do to help is offer my love and be here on this site incase someone reads a post and decides to talk to me about it.  Take care all of you x

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by Kitty1973 on Mar 27th, 2008, 1:04pm
I agree whole-heartedly with you Joey.  I have two children, a 15 yr old girl and a 13yr old boy.  They both know I have CH's, and they have seen/heard me suffer them.  I had a kip 10 one a few days ago, and nothing helped with the pain.  I paced, screamed, hit my head on things, and even yelled at my cat because it got in the way of my pacing and I stepped on it's tail.  

My son asked if I needed anything, to which I replied "Just leave me alone" very grouchily.  

My daughter asked me why I was banging my head into the wall, and I told her because it hurts.  She just looked at me for a minute like I was crazy, and then asked if it helped.  I told her I don't know, I just don't know what else to do.  

The next morning I appoligized to both my children.  I told them how sorry I was that I was so grouchy.  They both looked at me and said that it was ok, that they knew it wasn't really me talking, it was the headache talking to them.

I don't see how to hide these headaches from those who live with you and love you unconditionally.  I mean they affect so many things about your life.  The CH's affect where you go, how long you will stay, and even pop up every now and then unexpectedly.  We can't shield our children from life, and we all know how unfair life is.  What we can do is to be there just for our children to tell them that even though we may be grouchy during an attack, that we love them for wanting to help us, and  that we are so happy to have their support.

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by badboy.10k-ch34yrs on May 15th, 2008, 1:24am
My shining   SON.                                                                                                       Were where you when I was burned and broken?                                                                                                   While the days went by from my window watching?                                                                                                 And were where you when I was hurt and I was       helpless? Because the things you do and the things you say surround me. While you where hanging youself on someone elses words, die-ing to believe in what you heard. I was starring straight into the shinning SON.  Lost  before and  lost in time. While the seas of life and the seeds of change are planted. Outside the rain fell dark and slow. While I pondered on this dangerous but irristable past time. I took a heavinley ride throuh our silence. I knew the moment had arrived. The killing the past and coming back to life. I took a heavinley ride throuh our silence, I knew the waiting had began- and I headed straight into my shinning SON!                                                                                                                         I LOVE YOU SON!  Happy 16th birthday.

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by George_J on May 15th, 2008, 1:34am

on 05/15/08 at 01:24:23, badboy.10k-ch34yrs wrote:
My shining   SON.                                                                                                       Were where you when I was burned and broken?                                                                                                   While the days went by from my window watching?                                                                                                 And were where you when I was hurt and I was       helpless? Because the things you do and the things you say surround me. While you where hanging youself on someone elses words, die-ing to believe in what you heard. I was starring straight into the shinning SON.  Lost  before and  lost in time. While the seas of life and the seeds of change are planted. Outside the rain fell dark and slow. While I pondered on this dangerous but irristable past time. I took a heavinley ride throuh our silence. I knew the moment had arrived. The killing the past and coming back to life. I took a heavinley ride throuh our silence, I knew the waiting had began- and I headed straight into my shinning SON!                                                                                                                         I LOVE YOU SON!  Happy 16th birthday.


It's a good thing, isn't it?  But difficult.

Happy 16th to your son...and welcome to CH.com.

Best wishes,

George  

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by no-one on May 18th, 2008, 3:17pm

on 05/15/08 at 01:24:23, badboy.10k-ch34yrs wrote:
My shining   SON.                                                                                                       Were where you when I was burned and broken?                                                                                                   While the days went by from my window watching?                                                                                                 And were where you when I was hurt and I was       helpless? Because the things you do and the things you say surround me. While you where hanging youself on someone elses words, die-ing to believe in what you heard. I was starring straight into the shinning SON.  Lost  before and  lost in time. While the seas of life and the seeds of change are planted. Outside the rain fell dark and slow. While I pondered on this dangerous but irristable past time. I took a heavinley ride throuh our silence. I knew the moment had arrived. The killing the past and coming back to life. I took a heavinley ride throuh our silence, I knew the waiting had began- and I headed straight into my shinning SON!                                                                                                                         I LOVE YOU SON!  Happy 16th birthday.

I love that song http://youtube.com/watch?v=RuG_316cPMY   here it is with the music
I hope your son had a great birthday
PF wishes
b

Title: Re: Our children as supporters
Post by Pinkfloyd on May 18th, 2008, 11:50pm

on 05/18/08 at 15:17:53, no-one wrote:
I love that song http://youtube.com/watch?v=RuG_316cPMY   here it is with the music
I hope your son had a great birthday
PF wishes
b


Hey!! What can I say LOL.... ;)
Floyd has music for every occasion!!

Hey b, nice to see you. Hope you're well.
When are you going to change your screen name to "some-one", or "number-one"?

BobW



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