Last night some time after 9pm est my mom passed away.  She was only 62 yrs old...to turn 63 new years eve.  It was expected because my mom had a massive heart attack the morn of Nov 6, a month and half ago, and has been in a coma ever since.  Initially when she had her heart attack she had to have her heart shocked twice.  Her neurologist said from the beginning that she went to long without any blood or o2 to her brain although they werent sure exactly how long.  

My dad, sister and I were hoping shed wake up within the first week or so but no such luck.  She was on a ventilator and feeding tube until a week and a few days ago.  My mom whos name is Bernadette, did not want to be kept on any kind of machines for any reason whatsoever.  Then after meeting with the ethics committee they decided to let the family fulfill my moms wishes and take her off the machines.  So last night she went up to heaven to be with her mother.  That gives me some peace.  But despite knowing her condition and efforts to prepare for her passing...its way harder than i ever anticipated.  I cannot stop crying and I still have my 2 kids to tell.  they were aware of their grandma too.  We actually got to go to New York right after Thanksgiving to see my mom in the hospital and say our goodbyes.  I thought that would help.  Maybe some it did I dont know.  At this very moment it doesnt seem to have.  

I dont mean to keep rambling on but thank you for letting me.  Ive dealt with death before a long time ago but no one I was so close to.  I know time will heal all wounds but in the meantime I really dont know how to handle my moms passing.  

Well I dont know what else to say except thank you for being here for me and any prayers would be appreciated.  I am just glad my mom isnt suffering anymore... also very glad that she was not alone when she did pass.  My dad was with her holding her hand.  It was past visiting hours and my dad knew she wasnt doing well so the  nurses let my dad stay.  Thank the lord for that.  

Many Blessings to you and yours

Tess

((HUGGGGG)) My condolences to you, the rest of her family, and her loved ones.

All our thoughts and prayers to you and your family!!

So sorry to hear of your loss.

[smiley=hug.gif]

My condolences to you and your family. As much as you can be "prepared", a loss is a loss. It will creep into your life in ways that you may never have imagined, find ways to embrace the memories.

Scott

Tess,
I am so sorry.  My heart goes out to you and your family.

Carolyn

Oh Tess I'm so heartfelt sorry for your family's loss.  

Please let us know if there is anything we can do.

Pegg

Oh Tess, my heart goes out to you and your family.  You have my sympathies and prayers.  I am so very sorry for your loss.

love,
mel

M condolences on the lost of your mother Tess.

Oh Tess,

I'm so sorry, honey.    [smiley=hug.gif] :'(  It is so hard to loose your Mom.  Mine has been gone for five years and I miss her every day.  Time will ease the raw hurt that you feel, though.  My condolences to you and your family.  

Jeannie

Tess,

I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss.  This is a very hard.  My heart goes out to you.


Deepest condolences to you and your family.

Much Love,
Jackie

So sorry to read of your loss.  Deepest condolences to you and the other family members.  Very tough time of year for this type of an event.

Tess - sending hugs and condolences for you and your family.

Carol

My deepest condolences to you and your family.

Oh Tess, I am so very sorry sweetie.  Losing your Mom is gut-wrenching.

 Can you share some memories of her with us. I'd love to hear about this wonderful woman.


Linda

Aw Tess, I'm so very sorry.  I lost my mom at 59 and there's just no easy way to lose someone when you're not done with them yet.

All I can tell you is that you will adapt to it over many years.  You won't get over the missing her part, you'll just start making new memories without her.

Please accept my deepest condolences on you and your family's loss.
I will lift you all up in prayers to make it through the Holidays and beyond.  One step at a time.

Jesus Christ Tess, I feel so very very deeply for you. I know what it is to loose your mum at a way too young age  from personal experience, as she was 4 weeks from turning 58. She had throatcancer.

I also know what it is to take her off the machinery. It was the hardest decision me, my siblings and my dad ever had to make.

All I can say is, that my heart is there with you right now, even though we do not know eachother personally. But please know that you are in my thoughts.

With deepest condoleances, Pascal.

I'm so very sorry to hear this, Tess.

My sincere condolences to you and your family.

All the best,

George

Our deepest condolences to you and your family Tess, so very sorry for the loss of your Mom.

 B&A  :'( :'(

Tess,

I am so sad to hear that news.  Even with all the "she's better off",  "she's not suffering" or whatever it doesn't make the missing them any easier.  Let yourself cry.  It's therapuetic.  Gather with family soon and remember things that make you happy about your Mom.  You will carry parts of her forward and pass it onto your own children and anyone you come in contact with.

(((((Tess and Family)))))

Tess,

My utmost condolences to you and your family on the unfortunate turn of events.

((((((HUGS)))))),

Roland. :(

Tess, I've said it before, it's not the person who leaves us...she is out of pain and into a wonderful place. It is those who are left behind, trying to  cope with the hole in our world.
I lost my mom last yeasr, and just lost my Grandmother Halloween.......the Holidays are pretty odd this year, but we will get through them. Once done, we will continue to replace our sadness with fond memories of the people who have left us.
I wish you this......and some time to get to that point.

I wish I could give you a big hug right now.........

My deepest sympathy, Tess,
Cathi :-/

Tess,

I am so sorry to hear of your Mom's passing.  Your heart must feel like it is breaking into pieces.

She raised you to be a caring, sensitive and loving person...I can read this in your post.

Hold her memories close to your heart and smile when you think of her.

Please let your family know we are also thinking of them.

So sorry for your loss. My prayers are with your family.

Paul

Tess... I know how very much you loved your mom... and from our conversations I know how very much you meant to each other.

There are no words that will suffice to patch the huge hole left from your mom's passing. Just remember how much she loved you.

I wish these pixels could truly convey how sorry I am for your loss. I wish I could make it easier for you somehow. Mercifully, time will pass and the ache will be replaced by the warmth of the memories.

Keep the memory of your moms loving spirit alive with the gentle way that you have of loving your children.

I pray that you will be given the strength and courage that you need during this time and I trust that my prayers will be answered.

with warm regards,
Tony

Sorry to hear, Tess.  My condolences to you and your family through your times for her.

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss.  Mom's are so special and so painful to lose.

Talk about her often, remember her with your family and keep her spirit alive.

Praying for the strength that you need at this time of sorrow.

Hugs,
Donna H

Tess,

I am so very sorry for your loss. I know how much you enjoyed and looked forward to your visits with your mom. I went through a very similar situation with my mom. I was there with my Dad at the last minutes. We had also moved into a morphine drip that day and stopped any medical intervention. It's such a hard thing to do but it allowed her to die with dignity, something you also gave to your mom. Unfortunatly it still doesn't help with the pain and loss. Grieve now and allow memories and time to comfort you in the coming months. My prayers are with you and your family in this very difficult time.  (((HUGS)))

Charlotte

I'm so soy to hear this Tess - wth much love
helen x

I am very sorry, Tess.  

Thinking of you & your family @ this difficult time.

debs

You guys are all so dang wondeful !!!Thank you so much for the sweet replies...it truely means alot to me  Im sitting here reading them as tears pour down my face...gosh darn im already sick of crying...lol.  My eyes are so dry and burning!!  

I talked with my kids tonight and broke the news to them and they took it pretty hard but well at the same time.  We all cried together and then ended the night with remembering funny things about my mom and we werer laughing.  So I do agree and know that remembering her will help emensely.  Not that Id ever forget her,...I dont know how to put it but im sure you know what i mean...lol.  

As you requested Linda...lol...my mom was one of the most loving and giving people I ever knew...despite our differences weve had she would do anything and everything in her power to be there for me and my fam.  She always went out of her way for people no matter how it inconvenienced her.  Every year she would fly out to where ever my kids and I were living at the time to visit cause I could never afford a trip to NY where she was.  And she was soooo good at keeping a phone relationship going with me and my kids especially.  Since we lived so far away from eachother and only saw eachother once maybe twice a year.  My kids especially my son loved those phone calls.  And of course my son is really sad and mad that there will be no more phone calls with grandma.  But they are dealing pretty well.  

Again, I truely appreciate all your thoughts and prayers and advice.  It means so much to me.  As I think of more memories of my mom I will post them.  But for the moment Im so drawing a blank.  Im exhausted and need sleep.

I love you all!

Tess

Tess,   Thank you so much for sharing a part of your Mom with us.


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Aw, this is so, so, so sad.  She was so young.   [smiley=heart.gif]

That was a beautiful, beautiful tribute!

My deepest condolences to you, your family, and all who loved her.  I will hold you close in my prayers.

[smiley=hug.gif]

Laurie

My heart aches for you Tess as I only know too well what its like to lose someone you love dearly.

No matter how much preparation, you can not stop the hurt. It will be there for months and sometimes years to come.

Your mother will always be with you though and will watch over you from Heaven.

Love does last forever.

Sending you prayers, hugs and lots of love.

Tess,

I'm so sorry for you loss. My deepest condolences... [smiley=hug.gif]

Sanna

So sorry about your loss Tess.   Many hugs,
Langa

You have my deepest sympathy. Loosing Mom is loosing home.

Hugs BD

Dear Tess:

I am truly sorry for your loss and offer my deep condolences.

Ray

Very sorry to hear about your loss Tess.  My condolences to you and your family.

-P.

I am so sorry for your loss.

I am so very sorry to hear of your loss :'( :'( :'(

You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Love,

Jen

I am so so sorry. I haven't lost my Mom yet but I lost my dad. It hurts, but remebering the good times sure helps the pain.
Know I am thinking about you and your family.

So sorry to hear of your loss and all my condolences.

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Charlie