... my father passed away.

I recall very lively that early morning phone call from the hospital.

I recall my mother's hopeless tears... She didn't need to tell me what had happened; I knew as soon as the phone rang.

I recall my broken heart, my empty mind, that fog which I lived in for a such a long, long time. And still, at times, even after all this time, the pain and sadness get to me.

When I lost dad, I lost so much with him.

But this year... It's been easier. It's been a cold, but sunny day and I spend six hours at work, being too busy to take a breath, nevermind recalling the actual date. Time goes on, I suppose.

Mom and I visited dad's grave not that long ago. We would have gone there today as well had I had a day off. But this evening we will lit candles and a torch to remember him by. Dad was a great dad and a great, kind, loyal, honest and funny man and human being.

Sanna

The best of him lives on in you, Sanna.

i've often thought when i see my friends and family member die that the lord loved them so much the he had to bring them home. sanna i know we're not real close but i can tell from your posts that your are a kind compassionate beautiful human being. i'm sure your father ganders down at the earth with a gleam in is eye knowing that raised such an extraordinary  girl. i'm sure his values and convictions live on through you. that all you can hope for when you die, that you have good children to carry on.

 i've often thought when i see my friends and family member die that the lord loved them so much the he had to bring them home. sanna i know we're not real close but i can tell from your posts that your are a kind compassionate beautiful human being. i'm sure your father ganders down at the earth with a gleam in is eye knowing that raised such an extraordinary  girl. i'm sure his values and convictions live on through you. thats all you can hope for when your time to go, do i have any thing to show for the time i've been hear? that you have good children to carry on the legacy. i donn't know your father but i know you and i would say he was surrounded by many people who have gained from his existence here on earth

[smiley=hug.gif]


Carol

[smiley=hug.gif] Haven't walked that trail yet...not a day goes by I don't worry about it.

Joe

I am praying for you and your family Sandi!!

The loss of a parent is one of the hardest things in life to endure, but he helps make you the strong person you are!

Many Blessings

Tess

I lost my Dad in October last year and the same day Mum had a stroke, It's been pretty bad and Mum's still really upset, spoke to her tonight and had to ring her back because she could'nt talk.
She does'nt want to be here which is difficult for all of us
I hope it will get better, but why should it?
Shit, help, what do i do, what can i say
Sorry,, you hit a wrong cord
Colin.

Get on with things young man

[smiley=hug.gif]

All the best, Sanna.

George

Sanna, I can honestly say my mom's passing date has come and gone and I've not remembered sometimes.  But the ones that do get to me are Mother's Day & her birthday.  

Lots of hugs and love you to sweetie!

:'(me

Thank you all for your kind words. :)


-johnny- wrote on Apr 18^th, 2009 at 3:16pm:

i've often thought when i see my friends and family member die that the lord loved them so much the he had to bring them home.

That is beautiful way to look at it! Thank you. :)
When I really miss dad, I try to think that "ok, it was his time to go, he had finished everything he was meant to do here on Earth". But still, I kind of miss having him here in flesh and blood instead of just memories and fading photographs!

Mel,
I believe that the day dad died hits me harder is because my birthday and dad's dying day are only few days apart, and back in 1997, my birthday was Monday whereas dad passed away on the early hours on Friday. Mom said that she feared at the time that dad would die on my birthday, because she knew that it would have made my sorrow unbearable. We knew at the time that dad was getting weaker and it would be just the matter of time when his battle against cancer would be lost... but I am thankful that dad didn't die on April 14th.
But still, each year since, on my birthday, there is still that hint of sadness, which comes from knowing that one sad day is approaching.

Sanna

[smiley=hug.gif] I miss my dad too Sanna. They say time heals and it does. But there are just some days, well, you know. :'(

Barry, I know exactly what you mean... [smiley=hug.gif]

Sanna

Some days it feels like he has been gone forever and sometimes it feel like only yesterday.

Bless your heart, Sandie.  It's a hard loss.  He'll live in your heart forever, Sweetie.

Love & Hugs,
Jackie

Sanna,
I read your statement. The outpouring of love, the huge loss you feel- I, too, have lost my parents.  Sometimes, I can handle the loss, somtimes it fills me with loneliness. I simply move in and out of it, letting myself feel.

What struck me, though, is your way of expressing your feelings! Again, in such simple but eloquent words, you have spoken for many of us. There is no language barrier, Sanna, and your words should be published.

I'm sending you a big hug, and encouragement to continue writing like this..........
Cathi :-*

If you're the legacy he left behind, than he must've been a great man.

As you may know, my Mom passed on too last year in June.  I'm finally at a point where I can think of the funny things and all the funny memories....My mom was too funny.

Mostly I ache to touch her again.  Baby steps, one day at a time.  At least we do have good memories of our lost loved ones.  

God bless Pretty Girl...

Love ya,
Maria