New CH.com Forum | |
http://www.clusterheadaches.com/cgi-bin/yabb2/YaBB.pl
Daily Chat >> General Posts >> WalMart Trip by age ... http://www.clusterheadaches.com/cgi-bin/yabb2/YaBB.pl?num=1240605514 Message started by ClusterChuck on Apr 24th, 2009 at 4:38pm |
Title: WalMart Trip by age ... Post by ClusterChuck on Apr 24th, 2009 at 4:38pm The Scenario: You are in the middle of some kind of project around the house mowing the lawn, putting a new fence in, painting the living room, or whatever. You are hot and sweaty, covered in dirt or paint. You have your old work clothes on. You know, the outfit - shorts with the hole in crotch, old T-shirt with a stain from who knows what, and an old pair of tennis shoes. Right in the middle of this great home improvement project you realize you need to run to Wal-Mart to get something to help complete the job. In your 20's: Stop what you are doing. Shave, take a shower, blow dry your hair, brush your teeth, floss, and put on clean clothes. Check yourself in the mirror and flex. Add a dab of your favorite cologne because you never know, you just might meet some hot chick while standing in the checkout lane. You went to school with the pretty girl running the register. In your 30's: Stop what you are doing, put on clean shorts and shirt. Change shoes. You married the hot chick so no need for much else. Wash your hands and comb your hair. Check yourself in the mirror. Still got it. Add a shot of your favorite cologne to cover the smell. The cute girl running the register is the kid sister to someone you went to school with. In your 40's: Stop what you are doing. Put a sweatshirt that is long enough to cover the hole in the crotch of your shorts. Put on different shoes and a hat. Wash your hands. Your bottle of Brute Cologne is almost empty so you don't want to waste any of it on a trip to Wal-Mart. Check yourself in the mirror and do more sucking in than flexing. The spicy young thing running the register is your daughter's age and you feel weird thinking she is spicy. In your 50's: Stop what you are doing. Put a hat on, wipe the dirt off your hands onto your shirt. Change shoes because you don't want to get dirt in your new sports car. Check yourself in the mirror and you swear not to wear that shirt anymore because it makes you look fat. The Cutie running the register smiles when she sees you coming and you think you still have it. Then you remember the hat you have on is from Buddy's Bait & Beer Bar and it says, 'I Got Worms.' In your 60's: Stop what you are doing. No need for a hat anymore. Hose the dog crap off your shoes The mirror was shattered when you were in your 50's. You hope you have underwear on so nothing hangs out the hole in your pants. The girl running the register may be cute, but you don't have your glasses on so you are not sure. In your 70's: Stop what you are doing. Wait to go to Wal-Mart until they have your prescriptions ready, too. Don't even notice the dog crap on your shoes. The young thing at the register smiles at you because you remind her of her grandfather. In your 80's: Stop what you are doing. Start again. Then stop again. Now you remember you needed to go to Wal-Mart. Go to Wal-Mart and wander around trying to think what the heck it is you are looking for. You went to school with the old lady who greeted you at the front door. |
Title: Re: WalMart Trip by age ... Post by Mosaicwench on Apr 24th, 2009 at 9:44pm
It works about the same way for women, except we have to decide whether to put on a bra or just tuck 'em in our waistband . . . . .
Gettin' old ain't for the faint of heart! |
Title: Re: WalMart Trip by age ... Post by Sophia on Apr 25th, 2009 at 4:08am
Getting old or tucking them in our waistband seems to have happened to me at about 40!!!! Thank God for Wonderbra!! Now if they only made them in D cups....
Sophia |
Title: Re: WalMart Trip by age ... Post by QnHeartMM on Apr 25th, 2009 at 6:56am Mosaicwench wrote on Apr 24th, 2009 at 9:44pm:
LOL Pat!!! |
Title: Re: WalMart Trip by age ... Post by BarbaraD on Apr 25th, 2009 at 7:51am Mosaicwench wrote on Apr 24th, 2009 at 9:44pm:
LMAO -- AMEN!!! ;D ;D ;D |
Title: Re: WalMart Trip by age ... Post by Guiseppi on Apr 25th, 2009 at 2:29pm
I've been warning my kids..if you're a wimp...check out now! Getting old is tough! ;D.....(sorry chuck..I'm too young to relate to any of those men!)
Joe |
Title: Re: WalMart Trip by age ... Post by ClusterChuck on Apr 25th, 2009 at 2:44pm Mosaicwench wrote on Apr 24th, 2009 at 9:44pm:
EEEEEUUUUUUUWWW!!! I don't need the visual of you wimminz and your drag-them-on-the-floor, or tie-them-in-a-knot-so-I-don't-trip-over-them bewbies!!! <shudder> Scarred-for-life Chuck |
Title: Re: WalMart Trip by age ... Post by Brew on Apr 25th, 2009 at 3:06pm Quote:
There, fixed it for ya, Chuck. |
Title: Re: WalMart Trip by age ... Post by Guiseppi on Apr 25th, 2009 at 3:19pm
THAS messed up..... ;D
|
New CH.com Forum » Powered by YaBB 2.4! YaBB © 2000-2009. All Rights Reserved. |