Yesterday morning my daughter went to be with a friend at her father's funeral.  He had been suffering from depression for years, but everyone thought he had it under control.  He had an argument with his wife, and he decided to end it all.  He left behind a wife, a 14 yr old daughter, an 11 yr old son, and a 6 yr old son.  Needless to say their world has come to an end.

I know many of us here suffer with depression from time to time, and some of us more than that, but please don't turn to a permanent solution to a temporary problem.  I know how dark it can get, and how it seems like an easy way to get out of the pain, but the pain left behind will never end.

Just think, who will walk your daughter down the aisle, or be there to comfort her when she needs a good shoulder to cry on.  Who do you want her to turn to instead?

Who do you want to teach your sons to grow up to be men?  To teach them the kind of values they need to be productive adults?  Who will teach them how they should treat a wife if you are not there to demonstrate it?

I could go on, but I think you get my point.  The circle of pain he left behind is not a small one.  There are those of us who hurt also because of our loss of a friend, or because we see our kids hurting because their friend is hurting and they don't know how to give an answer as to "Why?  Why did he leave me?  What did I do wrong to make him do it?"  Or as his 6 yr old asked my daughter, "Did I do something bad?"

I beg of you, if you are struggling PLEASE reach out for help!  Don't be to proud to ask.  You will not diminish yourself by admitting you need help, but you will lose it all if you don't.  Depression is an illness, just like CH is.  If you can ask help for dealing with CH please ask help for dealing with depression.

Jerry

Your post hits home to most of us. In 1996 my cousin, Elaine, checked out by inhaling CO in the garage of the house she had just bought....we think she moved back to town for this purpose.

Anyway, it's been hard on her brother and me too as now I have only 2 cousins left and only 3 people in the whole family.  Elaine was manic and after her death we found drawers of pills that she never took.

This kind of suicide is definitely a selfish way out. We learned the hard way that with manic depression, you have to keep track of them all the time. They do nothing but lie about it. It's a terrible disease.

Good post Jerry.

Charlie

Jerry,  :'( Well said.

  Barry

My father committed suicide when I was 14.

I was traumatized for years.  I eventually got over most of it but I'm still, at 44 years old still working on some of it. 

It's never, ever just one thing that triggers this sort of event but a culmination of events that, at the moment seem insurmountable.

But you are right Jerry, it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem. 

Everything I have to left to give goes out to you and yours. 

Amen to everything you posted Jerry.  My condolences to all who are grieving over the loss of their loved one.

Beth

My condolences too, Jerry.

The guy I sit next to at work just got laid off. 

He had a wife and 2 college age boys before he shot himself.

He gave us no indication he was taking it that hard.

poof it was over, no one had a chance to help.
:'(