Now I've written the title I don't even Know how to start this post.

Why me ? What did I do to deserve this ?
I bet every one has asked these Questions at some point or another, I know I did.

Now I can't answer the "why me " cos why dose anyone suffer from anything?

As for the "what did I do to deserve this" The answer is simply nothing, it's just a failing of part of our bodies .

God dose not inflict us with terrible ailments to punish us. He loves us ALL perfectly whether we believe in Him or not, but He can use our problems for His good purposes.

When I first started getting hit by CH I prayed that the doctor would find an answer , on my first visit he diagnosed CH which from what I've read here is nothing short of a miracle in it's self.

Then when he referred me to a neurologist the first available appointment was in 6 months , my wife, after seeing what I was going through , prayed about the appointment then switched on the computer and looked on the NHS website and got me a cancellation for the following week .

The people in our Church have been absolutely fantastic ,I mean I've been brought up in a christian home and we always went to church on a Sunday etc. I strayed a way in my late teens and have only gone back about 2 years or so ago- to a different church after my wife was "converted", these wonderful people really care about us .

And now I've found this diverse community here on this board full of people from all walks of life , all brought together by a common problem , all who care about each other passing on any thing that could help another.

This may seem like a strange thought but how blest are we !

So why not me over anyone else ?

My prayer now is that if I can help just one person suffering from CH to find their Way through the pain then this will all be worth it .

Ok enough of my prattling on for now , just to say I'm not preaching here ,just wanted to try and wright down where I'm at and to say THANK YOU all for the part that you have played and are still playing in this part of my life.

Praying for you all , and maybe a cure?      amen

Nigel

What a beutiful positive post.  Thanks for shareing.  I have often pondered those same questions and come to the same conclusion.

Nigel, that was very nice.  Thank you.

It was CH that brought me close to the finest people I have ever met, and I'm proud to call them my friends.

Right now I'm hard pressed to find a better answer to the question "Why me?"

That was a beautiful post, Nigel.  Thank you.

With all of the pain and horrors CH can bring not only to the sufferer, but to those who know and love him or her, finding this place - this family, is truly a blessing.

Sandy

Nigel....

What a wonderful, truthful and heart wrenching testimonial... Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings...

Yes, many of us have said WHY ME? Over the years my pain and depression have been so great that it has taken members of this great Cluster Headache Family to bring me back to reality and make me remember that:

God won't ever let anything come my way that He and I together can't handle.
                            And
If He bring me to it... He will bring me through it!!

So once again I thank you for sharing...

Peace & Blessings
LadyLuv

Thank you all for your wonderful comments , I didn't know how this post would be received cos I'm not good at expressing how I feel in writing ,or any other way come to that matter, it took me a couple of hours to write that short post and thank God for spell checks , but I can see that I had nothing to worry about .

Thanks again

Nigel

ps: only 3 spelling errors in this one ....that's a first for me  ;D

You know, whenever I find myself saying "Why me?", I replace it with "Why NOT me?".

Seems to help for some reason...

May be it's because why not me sounds a lot less self centered than why me .
first time I heard some one say why not me over any one else was my father as he was dying of cancer it struck me as a profound thing to say then but I don't think I really understood it till now.

oh I've just noticed it's 3 am ! I should probably go get some sleep.

good night all , God bless

Nigel

Hi Nigel,

Many here who know me, know I'm a fully out of the Broom closet Witch.  But this family accepts me for who I am, and my beliefs, because...well I'm not sure why, they just do.

But I love all my Christian Sisters and Brothers, and I know (most of) them love me.  I hurt when they hurt, I love when they love, and I grieve when they grieve.

I've asked "Why Me"...but if not me, then who?  Who else would suffer in my place? 

Maybe, because of the diversity of US...just maybe, it is a testament of just how strong we are, regardless of our backgrounds or our belief systems, that we can all come together, and help each other. 

What a wonderful world this IS. 

Cannot tell you how many times I have asked why me and wondered how big of a prick I must have been in a past life to deserve such pain in this life.
Why not me I guess is a better way of looking at it and a bit more positive I guess but don’t think I will ever stop wondering why any of us should have to suffer like this.

Quote:

but don’t think I will ever stop wondering why any of us should have to suffer like this.

now that is the big question and  I'm afraid I don't have an answer for that one .

try reading "The Shack" by William P Young it deals with allot of these questions , tho I've not got my head around all of it yet , but it is a brilliant book- one of those that you can't put down.

Nigel

Don't believe in God as we have been taught.  Does he really "forgive" everyone at the end, like Hitler, Stalin and other murderers?  Why does this "god" give children cancer that can't be cured and suffer terribly?  This "god" must be a sadist and I would rather deal with the "devil" whom he is STILL trying to get back to heaven.  Religions, in my opinion, are fairy tails.

You are SO right Nigel, "The Shack" was a excellent book.  Very thought provoking!!!

Hay Tommy
God really dose forgive and already has forgiven all people ever . but forgiveness is a two way thing , we have to be willing to ask for it and repent of our sins.
All our iniquities were nailed into Jesus on the cross years ago. God's part in this is done and now it is our turn.
And all we have to do is believe and ask.

And as I mentioned before God dose not inflict things on us , that is not what love dose, but He will use every situation to achieve his good purposes.
He has no agenda with us , no expectations, He all ready knows every thing about us and every thing that is going to happen and every choice we're going to make.
If we believe and trust in Him He will help us through every situation we find our selves in .

erm.. I'm not a theologist here but i am absolutely convinced that God is real and He dose Love us and listen to us, from first hand experience.

any way Ill leave you to draw your own conclusions.
the last thing I want to do is shove religion down any ones throats.

all the best Nigel

Nice posts kids.

Should we meet God, I hope we'll finally find out why there are mosquitoes.

Charlie

....and seeds in watermelons.

Good post Nigel. :)

When these things were created they were only created as good, and we are all deciding what is good and what is bad ,which if my track record is anything to go by it's all pretty subjective ,so some of the stuff we considered good actually turns out to be bad ,like smoking (which I still haven't managed to kick yet) and some of the stuff we consider to be bad turns out to be good , like hallucinogenics ? may be ?

Any one who has read The Shack will know where I'm getting my answers from, it's really helped me get my head around this stuff.

Nigel

Mosquitoes are necessary to pollenate grass.

Callico wrote on Apr 25^th, 2010 at 5:05pm:

Mosquitoes are necessary to pollenate grass.

I think I'll pave my yard then.

ooo that will look nice , but at least you could sell your lawn mower, which will also help if it is a petrol one, cos skeeters are attracted to the smell of petrol  ;)

Grasses are pollinated by the wind (not insects), and if you mow your yard frequently, the grasses won't even make it to the bloom stage.

I should have picked up on that being as that is the reason my GP got a blank look when he asked me if my headaches came with watery eyes and a runny nose , and I was like  hay fever sufferer here it's abit of a job to tell . btw sneezing is a right pain when you are getting hit, makes you feel like that bloke from scanners just before his head exploded  ;D

Nigel

Quote:

ooo that will look nice , but at least you could sell your lawn mower, which will also help if it is a petrol one, cos skeeters are attracted to the smell of petrol

In 1950, when I was 4, a neighbor did pave his lawn and painted it green. It no doubt made for easy parking and saved on Flit...(very deadly bug spray for you youngsters)

Even if mosquitoes polinated grass and or cured cluster headaches, I'd still want the answer why they are made such pains in the ass.

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Charlie

I think it's just a self defence system although it dose seem counterproductive when they use it on us....SPLAT !

edited to add:-

I guess that they have there place in creation just like every thing else and we simply don't understand it yet .  May be when science has come up with a way to eradicate them from our planet without killing anything else well find out what it was and wish we still had them. may be we will never know ,I guess that's where faith comes in .

Nigel

Thanks Nigel....

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Charlie  8-)

Hmmm....a world in which pain was not a problem...which is what many of you are really asking when you ask, why or why not me...an CH...or cancer...or anything we do not especially like. It is, as we say, the million dollar question, with so many horrible answers. It's hard to sift through them all, including our own plight, without some kind of map.

God did it or did not do it, Satan did or did not, karma did or did not, s**t happens...these are the roadmaps we use to try and navigate our way through this world. Some work much better than others and seem to fit our understanding of how the natural order operates. Some fail miserably and leave us crying again, why me, when the pain and adversity hit.

I am by nature a skeptic (yes, in the classical Greco/Roman sense) and a True Believer (Christian and all that comes with it) because I have found this roadmap works best in a post-Copernican, post-modern, post-everything world and still gives me an answer when I am crying, or headbanging, or just plain satisfied with today.

Many people call this roadmap faith. For me, faith (your roadmap) must fit what we know about the world (sufi's and true Kantian believers, as well as Nihilists aside) and what God has revealed of His nature (which is why those mentioned paranthetically are mentioned parenthetically-they reject revelation as truth) and which works for us in all circumstances.

The short of it: thanks, all ya'll, for your support, and for allowing us Christians to be who we are without condemnation. We do get an awful lot of that these days...even us good guys.

And yes, I am a professional theologian, in case you were wondering. Recommend: The Problem of Pain; CS Lewis

Good post. Thanks for sharing.

Yeah it is a good post. This place is sort of a long distance "fellowship."

Stick around.

Charlie

thank you every one for your messages ,I don't feel so scared about writing about my faith any more, It's cool.

Wimsey what dose paranthetically mean? I've got an encyclopedic oxford dictionary here but I can't find it

Nigel

Parenthetically means an aside, or set apart from the sentence, as in a set of parentheses ( ). It also means, at least in the context of the sentence, that what is set apart can be taken completely out of the sentence and the remainder of the sentence will still make sense. When set apart by a comma or a set of commas, it is then more commonly called a subordinate clause. More than you wanted to know, huh?

Quote:

Parenthetically means an aside, or set apart from the sentence, as in a set of parentheses ( ). It also means, at least in the context of the sentence, that what is set apart can be taken completely out of the sentence and the remainder of the sentence will still make sense. When set apart by a comma or a set of commas, it is then more commonly called a subordinate clause. More than you wanted to know, huh?

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Charlie  ::)

Thanks Wimsey your previous post makes sense now  :)
I'm not too good on big words, Just a humble carpenter here .

I don't think, a world in which pain was not a problem ,is Quite right more an acceptance of a of pain allowing us to get past our own self pity and get on with our lives with out the wallowing . The pain will still be a problem but without feeling sorry for our selves it leaves us free to manage our pain  better ... sorry don't think that makes much sense but I know what I mean.