I'll admit it!  I'm in a very FOUL dark mood.  Been that way all day long.  Between the bouts of pain, I sit and stew.  UGH!!!  

I go tomorrow to get my O2 machine.  But the O2 only works it seems if I catch the CA right when it is happening.  Otherwise.....  Plus I've heard everyone talk about the shadows.  I know them now.  The vacant symptoms without the pain.  These are what put me in my dark space.  I could sit and stare a hole in the wall when I'm like this.  Trying to work on anything is beyond my ability.  BOOWHO!!  lol

Venting is good!!  Thanks for listening!!!

Allen Joe

"Venting is good!!  Thanks for listening!!!"




Sorry wasnt listening, busy reading  :)

Know the feeling though. Thats when you got to get up and move. Go outside and step on an ant. Then think about it.

Maybe think about it first and then step on the ant if still so inclined.

Try strong coffee or energy drinks for the shadows, sometimes you can chase em away with that. Then kick the bad mood and kick some demon ass! Our attitude is sometimes the only thing we CAN control, and it's one of our best weapons against this stuff! ;)

Hoping the 02 is as effective for you as it has been for me.

Guiseppi

Venting is always allowed. [smiley=hug.gif]

I've been through a few of what I call "cluster blues", those times when the pain and everything it brings with it just sent me into depressive state. I know it can be hard to fight the devil at times, but that's the only way with this thing.

Hope your foul mood turns into brighter soon... :)

Sanna

Thanks!  It's early and I got hungry in the middle of an attack.  Scrambled me some eggs.  Isn't it funny how something so simple can taste so good at a time like this?  

Does anyone else's nose get affected?  I can smell things all over the place now.  Must be all the O2 and/or stimulation to my nerves?  huh

So I'm full now, but the blues are still here.  Two hours until I go to the Dr.  The high light of my day?  LOL

Simple pleasures are the best; since ch came into my life I've loved a boiled/fried egg, piece of toast and glass of apple juice as much. ;D I believe that it's the intencity of the pain, which makes one appreciate these things.

I hope that you're feeling better. :)

PF days,
Sanna

My mood hasn't improved much. Still dealing with the "vacant" symptoms.  But Donna took me out for lunch at my favorite Mexican place.  Had some rice and a tamale and some GREAT conversation.  

I agree about the simple things.  Tonight I'm going to fix some chicken and noodles.  Very very basic comfort food for me.  Bag of noodles cooked, add two boxes of chicken broth, two cans of shredded chicken, a stalk of celery chopped, a carrot chopped and some salt and pepper.  Let it cook on the stove top for a while.  AH MAN!!! That is some good stuff!!!

ajarmstrong wrote on Jul 1^st, 2008 at 8:52am:

Thanks!  It's early and I got hungry in the middle of an attack.  Scrambled me some eggs.  Isn't it funny how something so simple can taste so good at a time like this?   YEE-HAW and YA-HOO, consider yourself lucky (or as lucky as someone with CH can) that you have an appetite in cycle. Many don't. If eggs do it for you, stock up AJ! Does anyone else's nose get affected?  I can smell things all over the place now.  Must be all the O2 and/or stimulation to my nerves?  huh Oh yeah! Been discussed. Search the archives on the old board. Myself, when it's gonna be a bad hit, smell ammonia. Then there's always the "smell" triggers like heavy perfume, hydrocarbons, or zinc welding. BAM, I HATE when that happens! So I'm full now, but the blues are still here.  Two hours until I go to the Dr.  The high light of my day?  LOL Best wishes. Go prepared. It's all here!!!

Regards and PF hopes,

Jon

I started keeping a log today.  Want to map out all the ups and downs and see if it makes any sense.  The mood swings, the pain swings.  How quickly they ramp and and ramp down.  How I'm feeling at the time.  It's the engineer in me!!

Lol

Hey AJ ... Boy do I understand this so well. I've been through hell and back in my life (let's just say I preferred the comforts of sleeping in a friend's garage during a midwest winter than my parents house growing up) and I've come out the back end of this NEVER needing an antidepressant. And then something happened and BAM I got the CH bad -- first bout was five months and they still didn't know what was going on until about a year and a half later. I've been on all manner of hydro-whatevers, none of which took away the pain.

Finally, a neurologist, who goes down in my book as my favorite person in the world besides my husband and child, figured it out.

Let's just say that I understand the ferocity of the foul mood. I can stink up my entire area code with one when in the throes of a cluster-freakin-episode. Sometimes I just ask everyone to leave the house and then rage until I have nothing else left to do than laugh at the inanity of myself. Then I usually sit down and eat some cookies.

I guess the windbag in me is trying to say your humor is the best weapon against this demon. It WILL disarm it. I swear to it. Just keep trying. And keep eating those scrambled eggs! A satisfied appetite will only piss the beast off. And there must be some satisfaction in that, eh?

Cheers!
Marie

Hey Brother,

    Hang in there!!!  Foul Foul Mood!!!  I can really relate to that.  I've been suffering with bouts for about 15 years but the last three bouts have kicked my A$$!!!  The two bouts before this years were extremely bad and turned me into a monster.  This bout was bad but even though I was member here, I started chatting with folks around here and really cheered me up even though the monkey was still on my back and had me in a choke hold!!! ;D  
   As Serg said, try energy drinks or strong coffee for the shadows!!!  PF times ahead!

Dave

ajarmstrong wrote on Jul 1^st, 2008 at 12:05am:

I'll admit it!  I'm in a very FOUL dark mood.  Been that way all day long.  Between the bouts of pain, I sit and stew.  UGH!!!

Most of us have been where you are!  SCREAM ... HOLLER ... YELL!!!

Get it out of your system.  THEN, grab ahold and tackle this head on!  
DON"T let it get you down!  
DON'T let the beast win!  
DON'T dwell on the hits!  
DWELL on the painfree times between hits!  
Live life to your fullest.  
DON'T let the beast stop you from doing what you want to do.  If you get hit during doing it, FINE!  Deal with the hit, and then get back on with your life!

I know, it is not easy to do.  BUT, you HAVE to grab this attitude and deal with it.  It is the only way we can live our lives with any sort of normality.



ajarmstrong wrote on Jul 1^st, 2008 at 12:05am:

I go tomorrow to get my O2 machine.  But the O2 only works it seems if I catch the CA right when it is happening.

I am concerned with what I am seeing in what you are saying.  It seems that oxygen is not working that well for you.  You also say that you are getting your oxygen MACHINE.  

If you are saying that you are getting an oxygen generator, this is NOT going to work for us clusterheads!  They cannot produce the flow rate that we need.  We need AT LEAST 15 LPM.  The generators don't produce that much.  Some do not get the desired results, until they get up to around 20 to 25 LPM.  Get the oxygen TANKS, not the machine.  Once you get the tanks, you can then go out and buy a regulator that will give you the higher flow rates.  If you have trouble getting one, PM me, and I will set you up.

OXYGEN is about the only thing that lets us live to any sort of normality.

Chuck

Chuck - quick question? You say the generators don't work as well as the tanks but my CH has immediate relief from his generator?

AJ,
  I'm with you on the foul mood part.  I've been getting hit with 2 - 4 on the Kip scale every 3 - 4 days.  I can't figure out the triggers if there are any, nothing seems consistant.  Pretty much it's been pissing me off for 3 weeks now.  Only one full blown cluster, and maybe another coming on now (hopefully it stops).