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Daily Chat >> Funnies and Jokes >> Economic Models explained with Cows PT2 http://www.clusterheadaches.com/cgi-bin/yabb2/YaBB.pl?num=1224248157 Message started by darknight on Oct 17th, 2008 at 8:55am |
Title: Economic Models explained with Cows PT2 Post by darknight on Oct 17th, 2008 at 8:55am
ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM
You have two cows You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull. A JAPANESE CORPORATION You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cowkimon' and market it worldwide A GERMAN CORPORATION You have two cows You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves AN ITALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows, but you don't know where they are You decide to have lunch A RUSSIAN CORPORATION You have two cows You count them and learn you have five cows You count them again and learn you have 42 cows You count them again and learn you have 2 cows You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka A SWISS CORPORATION You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you You charge the owners for storing them A CHINESE CORPORATION You have two cows You have 300 people milking them You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation AN INDIAN CORPORATION You have two cows You worship them A BRITISH CORPORATION You have two cows Both are mad. AN IRAQI CORPORATION Everyone thinks you have lots of cows You tell them that you have none. No-one believes you, so they bomb the **** out of you and invade your country You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION You have two cows Business seems pretty good You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION You have two cows The one on the left looks very attractive ;D :D ;) |
Title: Re: Economic Models explained with Cows PT2 Post by writer on Oct 19th, 2008 at 12:55pm
Howard,
The cow joke is exceedingly funny! Hope you post some more--? Writer (Barbara) |
Title: Re: Economic Models explained with Cows PT2 Post by Izzy on Oct 25th, 2008 at 9:59pm writer wrote on Oct 19th, 2008 at 12:55pm:
I concur! |
Title: Re: Economic Models explained with Cows PT2 Post by Barry_T_Coles on Nov 3rd, 2008 at 6:09pm darknight wrote on Oct 17th, 2008 at 8:55am:
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Title: Re: Economic Models explained with Cows PT2 Post by darknight on Nov 5th, 2008 at 9:41am writer wrote on Oct 19th, 2008 at 12:55pm:
Im Simon not Howard where dya get howard from ?? |
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