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Message started by Hoppy on Nov 21st, 2013 at 4:28pm

Title: "Euro- English"
Post by Hoppy on Nov 21st, 2013 at 4:28pm
English will be the official language of the EU, but
English spelling had some room for improvement with a
five year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English"

In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen world!

Hoppy.

Title: Re: Europe English
Post by Vikinggirl on Nov 21st, 2013 at 6:39pm
And this is the reason why Norway is NOT a member in EU !!!!!

Title: Re: "Euro- English"
Post by Hoppy on Nov 21st, 2013 at 7:37pm
Connie wrote,
And this is the reason why Norway is NOT a member in EU !!!!!

Hi Connie,
Sweden is. "Kopparberg Strawberry and Lim Sider"  [smiley=me&mb.gif]

Hoppy.

Title: Re: "Euro- English"
Post by lwatson8 on Nov 22nd, 2013 at 10:29pm
God on yu mat

Lars

Title: Re: "Euro- English"
Post by Hoppy on Nov 22nd, 2013 at 11:03pm
  ;D

Title: Re: "Euro- English"
Post by Vikinggirl on Nov 23rd, 2013 at 3:35pm

Hoppy wrote on Nov 21st, 2013 at 7:37pm:
Connie wrote,
And this is the reason why Norway is NOT a member in EU !!!!!

Hi Connie,
Sweden is. "Kopparberg Strawberry and Lim Sider"  [smiley=me&mb.gif]

Hoppy.

Sweden has a lot of good things, mainly cheep booze, booze, booze, siggis, food and good neighbours  :)

Strange though, this "Euro-English" is atually getting closer to Norwegian. We use S instead of C, K in stead of hard C, V in stead of W and of course we only use the O in OU.
First lession in Norwegian  ;D

Connie

Title: Re: "Euro- English"
Post by Hoppy on Nov 24th, 2013 at 5:49pm
You never know, i could have a Viking ancestor.[smiley=rolleyes.gif].

Hoppy.

Title: Re: "Euro- English"
Post by Vikinggirl on Nov 24th, 2013 at 6:19pm
You're right, vikingblood is spread all over  ;)

I know I have Aussie relatives. My grandfather moved to Australia back in 1947, after devorcing my grandmother. I bet he remarried and had more children down under  :)
So - I should really learn som Aussie-English !

Title: Re: "Euro- English"
Post by Hoppy on Nov 24th, 2013 at 6:55pm
Hi Connie,
This might help, If you ever come down under.



ARTERY        The study of painting.
BENIGN         What you be after you be eight.
BACTERIA      Back door to cafeteria.
BARIUM         What doctors do when patients die.
BUNION         Pauls surname.
CATSCAN      Searching for kitty.
CAUTERIZE    Made eye contact with her.
COLIC           A sheep dog.
COMA           A punctuation mark.
D&C             Where Washington is.
DILATE         To live longer.
DOSE            A short sleep.
ENEMA          Not a friend.
FESTER         Quicker than someone else.
FIBULA           A small lie.
GENITAL         Non Jew.
G.I.SERIES      World series of military baseball
HANGNAIL       What you hang your coat on.
HERNIA           Pertaining to a females knee.
IMPOTENT       Distinguished, well known.
LABOUR PAIN    Getting hurt at work.
MEDICAL STAFF  A doctors cane.
MORBID            A higher offer  than i bid.   
NITRATES         Cheaper than day rates.
NODE               I knew it
OUTPATIENT     A person who has fainted.
OVA                 Finished, done with.
PAP SMEAR       A fatherhood test
PARADOX          Two doctors.
PELVIS             Second cousin to Elvis.
POST OPERATIVE  A letter carrier.
RECOVERY ROOM  Place to do uphostery.
RECTUM              Damn near killed him.
SACRUM              Holy.
SECRETION          Hiding something.
SEIZURE              Roman emperor.
SPERM                To reject, look away
TABLET               A small table.
TERMINAL ILLNESS  Getting sick at the airport.
TUMOUR             More than one.
URINE                Opposite of mine.
VARICOSE          Nearby.
VEIN                 Conceited. 
Back to top   

Title: Re: "Euro- English"
Post by Vikinggirl on Nov 24th, 2013 at 7:14pm
Wow Hoppy, that is amazing. I nearly wet my pants laughing  [smiley=bow.gif]

Going to bed now, dreaming of Pelvis and papadoxis, and wondering who Paul is   ;D

Connie

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