New CH.com Forum
http://www.clusterheadaches.com/cgi-bin/yabb2/YaBB.pl
Daily Chat >> Funnies and Jokes >> Better late than never...
http://www.clusterheadaches.com/cgi-bin/yabb2/YaBB.pl?num=1451171727

Message started by LasVegas on Dec 26th, 2015 at 6:15pm

Title: Better late than never...
Post by LasVegas on Dec 26th, 2015 at 6:15pm
This is a funny song any time of the year, but especially this month...

Adam Sandler - Chanukah Song ;D :D ;D

START PRINTPAGEMultimedia File Viewing and Clickable Links are available for Registered Members only!!  You need to Login or RegisterEND PRINTPAGE

Title: Re: Better late than never...
Post by LasVegas on Dec 26th, 2015 at 6:21pm
Employee Christmas Party MEMO
       

Christmas Party

December 1...To All Employees

I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will be held
on December 23rd at Luigi's Open Pit Barbecue. There will be lots of
spiked eggnog and a small band will play traditional carols...feel free
to sing-along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as
Santa Claus to light the Christmas tree.

Exchanging gifts among employees can be done at this time. Please
remember to keep gifts to the agreed $10 limit.

Merry Christmas to you and yours,

Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

------------------------------------------------------------------------

December 2...To All Employees

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish
employees. We recognize that Hanukkah is an important holiday and
often coincides with Christmas (although not this year). However, from
now on we're calling this party our Holiday Party. The same policy also
applies to employees who are celebrating Kwanzaa at this time. There
will be no tree or Christmas carols sung.

Happy holidays to you and yours.

Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

------------------------------------------------------------------------

December 3...To All Employees

Regarding the anonymous note I received from a member of Alcoholics
Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, I'm happy to accommodate
your request but please remember that if I put a sign on the table that
reads "AA Only" you won't be anonymous any more.

In addition, we'll no longer be having a gift exchange because union
members feel that $10 is too much money.

Patti Lewis, Human Resources Director

------------------------------------------------------------------------

December 7...To All Employees

I have arranged for members of Overeaters Anonymous to sit farthest
away from the dessert table and for pregnant members to sit closest to
the restrooms. Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not
have to sit with gays; each group will have its own table. And, yes,
there will be a flower arrangement for the gay men's table.

Happy now?

Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

------------------------------------------------------------------------

December 9...To All Employees

People! People! Nothing sinister was intended by wanting our CEO to
play Santa Claus. Even if the anagram for "Santa" does happen to be
"Satan." There is no evil connation to our own little "man in a red
suit."

Patti Lewis, Human Resources Director

------------------------------------------------------------------------

December 10...To All Employees

Vegetarians! I've had it with you people. We're holding this party at
Luigi's Open Pit Barbecue whether you like it or not. You can just sit
at the table farthest from the "Grill of Death" as you call it, and
you'll get salad bar only including hydroponics tomatoes. Tomatoes have
feelings too, you know. They scream when you slice them. I can hear
them now. I hope you have a rotten holiday. Drive drunk and die, you
hear me?

The Bitch from Hell

------------------------------------------------------------------------

December 14...To All Employees

I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery
from her stress-related illness. I'll continue to forward your cards to
her at the sanitarium. In the meantime management has decided to cancel
the Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with
full pay.

Terri Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director

Title: Re: Better late than never...
Post by LasVegas on Dec 28th, 2016 at 10:28am
Weekend Update: Adam Sandler on Hanukkah
After noticing a lack of Hanukkah tunes, Adam Sandler decided to sing a Hanukkah song about all the famous Jewish people you might not know about such as David Lee Roth, Goldie Hawn and The Three Stooges. [Season 20, 1994]

START PRINTPAGEMultimedia File Viewing and Clickable Links are available for Registered Members only!!  You need to Login or RegisterEND PRINTPAGE ;D

New CH.com Forum » Powered by YaBB 2.4!
YaBB © 2000-2009. All Rights Reserved.