Am in a foul mood.

He knows I need support/help with chores, kid etc when in cycle and I had a particularly bad day today

Told me he would be home 7.30 for all to eat together
Rings 8.20 on mobile and is only just leaving "meeting" at Heathrow
He is slurring
I ask "Have you been drinking?"
He says "Just Coffee"
He drives one hour home

I could smell him as he came through the door!
He is then quite aggressive to me (only ever verbal btw and only ever is when drunk)

I know him well enough to know that slurring = WAY over the Drink Drive limit as he can drink a lot before it even shows as he is VERY big (6'7")

AND he lied to me

AND he slunk off to bed while I getting kid to sleep and is now snoring next door

Tempted to kick him awake and scream at him.
I am so furious because if he loses his licence he loses his job and we would be destitute


Serious question: What shall I do to him tomorrow?? or tonight as right now I feel like killing him

W

all this is true, I promise )

I know you are right but I am SO angry.

He used to drink drive many years ago before we were married but stopped when I gave him an ultimatum.

I have never known him lie before either and I've known him as a friend since we were 18.

It's great being able to post it here as I wouldn't humiliate him by talking to friends or family.

W

well, obviously, sex is out of the question..........

Gee, Wendy....tomorrow, he will be sober(or dead if he's not)...
and, just as an observation it is somehow comforting to know men are consistent in their cultural consistencies.
Gil is not a drinker, per se..... one or 2 and he's done....but, if he were to come home...isn't the term pissed?? Slogging drunk?  I'd likely make a ton of noise in the early morning, till he woke up, and, when the boys aren't around, we would be having a talk(euphemism).....HE LET YOU DOWN LAST NIGHT! Oh, and lies......not tolerated well, are they?   As a team member, he was not in uniform last night.
UMM>. advice?? I know you can handle this.
I hope tonight is considerably better.....
Sleep Well,
Be PF

Cathi

Quote:


In my opinion...you answered it yourself. (above)


    Tell him driving while drunk and lying is totally UNACCEPTABLE!!!!!!!


Oh...and stand by that.  No waffeling.  No excuses accepted.  Make sure he knows that it will be a deal breaker if he does it again.

I was going to quote the same thing as Linda. 
By your removal of the sentence I was going to quote, I think you know what you are to do. 
This is unacceptable. 
It is also unacceptable not to do anything when your ultimatum is broken.

That's just my opinion.

Can't sleep- too bloody angry

But the good news is that means I probably will have my first night without a CH attack for a month!

Brian- It was the M25 from Heathrow towards Watford- usually a Car park, not a road, almost always VERY busy.

Like your style Helen! Some very good ideas there.

This will make you laugh though: I did try and lie down in our bed- he stirred and half woke up, I shoved him and told him to face the other way because the smell of "Coffee" was too strong!

Going to do some work now so the sleepless time isn't wasted


W

One screw up in how many years?
Give the guy a fuckin break, you are neither his mother nor he your son. You are partners. Remember that when you decide to put on the "nagging, life is so unjust" act.
He fucked up, end of story.

it only takes one "fuck up" karma.............................

advice is not always what you want to hear.
Didn't condone what your man did, just don't agree with treating him like a child.
Been married 20 years and fucked up many times but we always worked it out as adults.

Yes, it's one fuck-up in many years, but it's a serious goddamned fuck-up. It's blatant disregard for human life with a lethal weapon. You think that's supposed to be just kissed and hugged away without any consequence?

You're dead wrong on this one, karma. And that may not be what YOU want to hear.

Quote:


Man, I like my beer very much (and you have seen that, Brew) but the last thing I would do is get behind the wheel while im sucking suds!

When I hit 27 years old I knew that I could kill someone, too bad it took that long. I quite all drugs back then and decided that I would only drink at home, aint seen the inside of a bar since........not including the convention hotel bar......LOL  

BMoneeTheMoneeMan wrote on Sep 3^rd, 2008 at 9:17pm:


Bloody hell

I haven't DONE anything! I am getting some washing done and posting on here until I have calmed down so I DON'T do anything rash in the heat of the moment.

If you would like the extra reason I am angry as well as the lying, he was aggressive to me in front of our son (guilt talking maybe?) who asked me "if Mummy and Daddy were getting a divorce!!!!"

(we never argue in front of the kid- I abhor that as well)

W