My name is Patty. I am the mother of four boys.  I'm 32 years old and have suffered from ch, I believe, all my life.  I was dxed with ch not even 2 months ago. but, I think that I have had either episodic or cornic all my life.  I was always told that I had migrains, sinus infection, upper teeth pain, ear pain, etc. In 1999 I had a mri done, because the doctors could not find any way to relieve or explain my headaches. That mri did not show  cause for the headaches, or that I had Sinus infections. It did find an avm. Aterio-venus malformation, on the left side my atrery is connected directly to the vein instead of running through capillaries. I was born with it. An angipgram showed that it is a level one, stable and has not bleed. Why do I tell you this? So when I explain why I cannot take most aborts you know why. Because of the AVM, I am not able to tke the abortive meds that so many of you can. I also cannot take any of the prevents either. Lithum and depokate- one boxed my kidneys and the other my liver. Zyprexa caused me to develop type 2 diabetes. Predisone and DHE were the last tried and turned down because of the effect on my heart. Verpemal and Inderal I am deathly allergic to.
    In desportion, I started searching the internet, when the ain hit- reading and learning keeps me sane. In my seardhing I found this site. finally some where I can be understood. when I say it hurts only another sufferer and God really knows what I mean. Asking about o2, I learned about welders o2 and again I found hope. You see, my medicaid will not play for o2 for ch because my o2 sats do not drop during an attack.
   The last few days have been hard on me, but thanks to this site I have been able to make it. Now, you are probably wondering about my title and purpose for writing... 3 days after I joined I received my first pm, a very cool moment. It had no subject line, just the word: troll in the body of the letter.  I was very curious, but just shoke my head. I did not know the meaning of troll and so continued on.
  I found out the meaning of troll and it broke my heart. Junkie, somone not wanted or someone that doesn't fit in. because I now know what that pm meant, I canot stay as a member on this site. I can't tell you the heart ache that I feel. while this may seem petty, to me it is not. How can I pour out my heart, sarrows and sufferings to anyone knowing that those same things will be used against me to label me.
    Writing this good--bye post hurts me so much, I had to write it out at home first- so that I didn't ball at the liabary in public. On top of this I have just found out that my husband did not make enough for us to afford the o2 or other meds Herbs and vits. that I need to fight this thing down.  and it's raining a definate trigger for me.  What a time to lose all hope.
It's to bad that one bad apple ruins the whole batch. I will not namenames- the one who labeled me troll know who thaey are. to set that person straight, I DO NOT USE DRUGS!! and I very rarly use narcs. about once a month I give into the pain and take 5mg of pericet and only when the pain is so bad that I cannot function as a mother while my husband is at work.  And no It doesn't help much. Brings a 10 down to an 8. So if that makes me a Junkie, Then I am a Troll.
   I would like to thanks ch hell.  I left you an email. Thank you for the phone calls and all of the knowledge you shared with me. YOu were an answer to a prayer.
I would also like to thank ON MY KNESS- you are right, that is an excellent position to pray. Thank you for your greetings from south Idaho.
I will be pming dj now to request that my membership be closed.  good luck to all, I will keep you in my prayers.

A one-word PM weighs more heavily than the good wishes of many others?

I understand that you may have found the comment hurtful, but it seems to me that you're holding everyone on this site accountable for it.  Sorry, but that's completely unfair.

Like anyone else here, I can only control what I say to you--I cannot control what others may say or do.   

Do what you must--but if you don't want to receive any more PM's from a particular person, you can block them. 

You know you're not a "troll"--so blow it off, and get to know the other fine people here. 

Just my opinion--take it for what it's worth. 

All the best,

George

What's happening to this place recently?
Seems there are a lot of fights between members.
Off course I am thankfull to the people on the watch out for trolling, but aren't we seeing things as a community?
Give new ones a chance to prove themselves, without labeling them so soon as a troll.

And to the real trolls: what the hell is it you get from here? I don't get it.

Pataya, don't let anyone chase you away as long as you know you are sincere.

Pascal.

This Topic was moved here from Funnies and Jokes by Mrs Deej.

Thanks Mrs deej!!!

Patty,

I'm sorry about your ordeal, but one person do not speak for this entire group.

I say this because all of us should not be punished for what one individual have said. There are some really nice people on this board. People on this board have even saved lives, including mine.

My advise to you would be to forgive and ignore that individual and give the rest of us a chance.

You can come here 24-7, cry, moan, groan, laugh, pray or what ever... and there will always be someone around to listen and assist; and the best part is, it's free.

I can not promise you that your feelings will never be hurt again on this board, but through experience, I can promise you that the Good Ch's far out weigh A-- H---s.

Peace & Blessings
Ruthie

Patty, I'm sorry to see you go.  There are a few very judgmental people here.  I don't know what they gain from being so mean.  But it is very hurtful.  I can understand not wanting to make yourself vulnerable.  When you're in a place that's already hurting, it can be hard to see your way through the bad apples, I know that.  But there are so many wonderful people here.  I'm sorry you didn't get the chance to experience much of that.

I hope you continue to search the board knowledge, even if you are no longer a member.  And I hope that if you come to a place where you're feeling emotionally stronger, that you know you can rejoin.   

((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Laurie

Ya, what they all said. Stick around. Seems there is a turd in every punch bowl.
all the best
the bb

Mean people suck, Patty.  Please don't let one nasty send you off!!!

I started to visit this message board a couple of weeks ago and have learned so much...and actually learned what I needed most to learn, that there *are* people out there that truly understand and they are there to share what they know and to help, so in turn, when I am feeling better someday (soon, I hope!!!) I can use what I've learned to help someone else that is new.  A circle of hope

Stick around, please.

I know who sent the PM...

Not even for a chocolate sundae...errr, well maybe!!  lol

I'll keep the blood on my hands for this one...

Oh Steph...what a DELICIOUS tease...it reminds me of when I was a kid on Christmas Eve...the anticipation was almost painful...with the full awareness that what I awoke to might be a HUGE disappointment!

I actually don't care who it was, cuz they got to live with themself...that this f@@K has to worry that they might be outed at any time...heee.heeee, that there is better than banning.

PLEASE...don't ever tell (well, maybe SOMEDAY, but not soon...)

and Patty, stick around sister....there's dang few of us out here, and we can't afford to lose any...

Best,

Jon

Quote:



Why reward them for being foolish? 

with warm regards,
Tony