Click this link to read a post I like on the clusterheadaches.com message board...

LeLimey

Ex Member

Okay - moving forward.
Nov 21^st, 2008 at 12:32pm

Hello everyone.

I have purposely started a new thread and not carried this on on the previous one I started in the hope it can be a fresh beginning.

I spoke at length to both DJ and Steph the other night and asked permission to present an idea I'd had to all of you.

I went away very upset on Sunday but determined to think, if I could of a solution but one we could ALL agree on and be involved with. No easy task!

I propose we have a "Code of Conduct.

A set of rules if you like, an agreement, by which we will act on ch.com.

It will need to cover
The way we act on the getting to know you board primarily
The meds and therapies board and the other "serious" boards.
The General Board and not forgetting..
The Alumni Board

We need to define what a troll is to all our satisfaction. To have a description of traits much as we do for CH traits.

IE Someone who posts that something you can buy OTC works for them is NOT a troll!!! Someone SELLING something on their own website IS.. see the difference?! I'm sure you can think of more though.

The big thing is, we can ALL have input. We can all say what we do like and don't like and would like to see as our accepted practices.

THEN we can form it into an agreement which we can all pledge to uphold. DJ has already suggested having a status like alumni status for those who agree to uphold the code.

So all that remains is to ask what you think, for your suggestions and for your work on cleaning up our happy home

Are YOU in??

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Racer1_NC CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline "Well, let's go see." Posts: 4417 Lewisville, NC Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #1 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 12:35pm Works for me.....
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Jimi CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Don't feed the moderators Posts: 4925 Madisonville, KY Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #2 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 12:37pm Yes.............most definately!
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Paul98 CH.com Alumnus Offline What, it's all in my head? Posts: 2532 Clyde, NY USA Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #3 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 12:46pm Sounds good to me. -P.
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artonio7 Ex Member	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #4 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 12:46pm Excellent! GREAT IDEA! it can be kinda like the ten commandments of ch.com. It will give all involved a firm idea of what is both expected and what is not tolerated. with warm regards, Tony
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DennisM1045 CH.com Alumnus Offline One wave at a time! Posts: 3437 Haverhill, Massachusetts, USA Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #5 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 12:51pm I like it Helen. I like it a lot. -Dennis-
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LadyLuv CH.com Alumnus Offline I love YaBB 1G - SP1! Posts: 1495 Champaign, IL Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #6 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 1:03pm AMEN.... COUNT ME IN.... Lady Luv
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catlind CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Surf's Up! Posts: 4536 Weaverville NC Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #7 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 1:44pm Count me in, seems an appropriate way to alleviate some of the tense posts and scenarios that come up. Cat
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HappyElaine CH.com Alumnus Offline I love YaBB 1G - SP1! Posts: 603 Flovilla,GA Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #8 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 1:54pm I agree and I am in !
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thebbz Ex Member	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #9 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 1:58pm I'm in, but can I have some cookies or something? Maybe a new oar, I have some green lookin stuff on mine all the best the bb
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Dan CH.com Newbie Offline I Love CH.com! Posts: 14 Kent, England Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #10 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 2:10pm You can count me in Helen. P.S. Thankyou so much for your time & words over the phone, it means alot. Dan
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wildhaus

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Wildhaus|Switzerland
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Re: Okay - moving forward.
Reply #11 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 2:16pm

Quote:

I propose we have a "Code of Conduct.
A set of rules if you like, an agreement, by which we will act on ch.com.

Are YOU in??

I am sorry, but I can not find my self jumping into this venture.
If DJ and Steph. find it there for necessary to have me removed from the boards
I will respect the verdict, but I will not restrict my self to an “artificial” set of rules that I can not promises to obey….

Michael

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debOUCH CH.com Old Timer Offline ..&^%%$(&^&^%.. Posts: 481 x0\|Holbrook\|USA\|\|0\|0\|NY,New_York Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #12 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 2:19pm You got it, Helen!! I am absolutely in!! You know, it just would not be right without you here!!!!!!!!!!! I believe you may have been my first "CH Sister"!! deb xo
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gizmo CH.com Hall of Famer Offline Posts: 522 Germany Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #13 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 2:28pm Common sense would do ... Oliver
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karma CH.com Hall of Famer Offline I love YaBB 1G - SP1! Posts: 937 St. Maarten/Neth. Antilles Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #14 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 2:29pm Sure, why not. But I don't really think it's necessary As it is, with the stroke of a key offending members can be removed. Seems pretty simple and hardly used. This board does a pretty good job of moderating itself. A bump in the road now and then is expected and will happen no matter how many rules we pledge to follow.
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Cathi_Pierce

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Re: Okay - moving forward.
Reply #15 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 2:52pm

I am soo in agreement in theory, Helen! Being roughed up in order to belong here is common practice. People automatically go on the attack. Clusterville is a place where ESPECIALLY new arrivals should feel safe....not challenged.
DJ has always functioned without "rules", per se, and people have been counted on to comport themselves appropriately. To the best of my recollection, in all these years, he has, when things got really bad, shut this place down............twice.
I guess I prefer people use the Honor System, rather than rules. Rules lead to consequences, then we have to have someone decide the offense and subsequent punishment. Of course, my suggestion won't work, either, and that's where we are all on our own, behaving as adults do, not judging and not attacking, but listening and understanding.
OK, so, full circle.....what now??

Cathi

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Guiseppi CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline San Diego to Florida 05-16-2011 Posts: 12063 SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA USA Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #16 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 3:14pm I think it's a great idea. "Common Sense" should prevail.......but clearly of late it has not. Damn happy you're still here, need my witch fix now and then! Guiseppi
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purpleydog

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Re: Okay - moving forward.
Reply #17 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 3:19pm

gizmo wrote on Nov 21^st, 2008 at 2:28pm:

Common sense would do ...

Oliver

I agree here. I think showing mutual respect is all that is needed. And most people already show that common respect.

While I'm sure there may be some specific ideas on how the members of this forum should act, doesn't it really come down to the golden rule? If there is a set of rules to go by, this board would have to be heavily moderated to enforce those rules. And what are the consequences when the rules are broken?

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artonio7

Ex Member

Re: Okay - moving forward.
Reply #18 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 3:30pm

purpleydog wrote on Nov 21^st, 2008 at 3:19pm:

gizmo wrote on Nov 21^st, 2008 at 2:28pm:

Common sense would do ...

Oliver

I agree here. I think showing mutual respect is all that is needed. And most people already show that common respect.

While I'm sure there may be some specific ideas on how the members of this forum should act, doesn't it really come down to the golden rule? If there is a set of rules to go by, this board would have to be heavily moderated to enforce those rules. And what are the consequences when the rules are broken?

Well... in religion there are rules, say for instance the ten commandments. Some believe that when the ten commandments are broken and if the appropriate regret/remorse/plea for forgiveness has not been excersized to the appropriate parties ... then it goes to reason that they will be condemned to an eternity in hell.

I agree that the forum would have to be heavily moderated around the clock to enforce the rules. Perhaps a committee can be elected of moderators, whose job it will be to monitor the boards in shifts 24/7... or common sense would be good also.

with warm regards,
Tony

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echo CH.com Alumnus Offline Chronic and still alive --- I Win! Posts: 4544 Overland Park, KS Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #19 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 3:33pm In
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Jimi

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Don't feed the moderators

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Madisonville, KY
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Re: Okay - moving forward.
Reply #20 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 3:43pm

I belong to another message board The Catspause. (Kentucky basketball) When a thread starts going downhill fast or a fight breaks out, they lock the thread.

If a person comes on there and starts cussing someone out, or gets racist, homophobic, attacks someone for no reason, they get an email stating if it happens again, they were banned for 30 days in which time they could reapply.

DJ has shut down the board before and I always wondered why he didn't just ban the problem child for a few days instead.

This board is different though and assigning different mods would have to be done very carefully. Not everything is black and white, many times they are just different shades of gray.

What I DO intend to do is not set back silently when I see someone being abused. I am gonna start calling them out. Maybe if someone is being a bully, if 10-12 people rise up and bully the bully, maybe it will get better, maybe not. I think this is what Steph was trying to say a few months ago, that we need to be more pro-active and police ourselves.

Helen, you wanted discussion, this should do it lol.

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I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.

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BlueMeanie

Ex Member

Re: Okay - moving forward.
Reply #21 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 3:59pm

I agree we shouldn't call names and be totally rude, especially to newbies.

When someone comes here and everyone agrees that, yes, thier remedy MAY work, it is just misleading others who are looking for answers. If you make a list of things that may have aborted at least ONE headache at one time, then EVERYTHING works.

Before finding this place I was told by everyone my whole life to lay down, try rubbing vicks on your chest, take a nap, don't think about it, take an aspirin, try this, try that, it worked for me, etc. Then I found this place and was so relieved that others understood Cluster Headaches and didn't try telling me to try some stupid remedy that I knew didn't work.

I believe this SET OF RULES all started because someone got upset about a person saying Pepsi works. Personally I've always liked the idea of communicating with others who HAVE Cluster Headaches.

This guy claimed that 700 Clusters Headaches where aborted by drinking 700 Pepsi's. I'm sorry, but either his wife doesn't have Clusters or something is very fishy about his Cure.

To stop people from stepping up and saying something IMHO defeats the purpose of the board. That's what I've always loved about Jonny; he can spot them a mile away. Wink

OK, i've rambled long enough, but that's my take. I don't agree with the Code of Conduct. I've been here 6 years TODAY and the board has always worked itself out without a Code. I think there where only a couple of times DJ has stepped in to stop the fighting.

I'm checking out for a long spell and hope you all can work something out. As you all know, I'm in a very depressed state and may be for a long while and can't deal with this right now. Fortunately my Cluster Headaches went away around 10 days ago after 6 months. Before I sign off I would like to say:

THANK EVERYONE WHO SUPPORTED ME THROUGH MY ROUGH TIMES AND WHO CONTRIBUTED TO MY SON. THANK YOU FOR HELPING ME KEEP MEDS STOCKED TO LAST AS LONG AS THEY DID. I LOVE YOU ALL AND HOPE TO MEET UP AGAIN SOMEDAY.

BlueMeanie

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deltadarlin CH.com Alumnus Offline I love YaBB 1G - SP1! Posts: 3823 Downsville LA Gender:	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #22 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 4:26pm I'm in. I've belonged to a few messageboards and I've moderated a few message boards and they've all had rules that the members had to follow.
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FramCire

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Life like a froward child
must be humored a little

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Re: Okay - moving forward.
Reply #23 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 4:27pm

wildhaus wrote on Nov 21^st, 2008 at 2:16pm:

Quote:

I propose we have a "Code of Conduct.
A set of rules if you like, an agreement, by which we will act on ch.com.

Are YOU in??

I am sorry, but I can not find my self jumping into this venture.
If DJ and Steph. find it there for necessary to have me removed from the boards
I will respect the verdict, but I will not restrict my self to an “artificial” set of rules that I can not promises to obey….

Michael

I am trying to reply here with the utmost respect BUT I don't understand what your issue is with this. You agree to terms and conditions on EVERY thing you sign up for or join. The rules you agree to are "artificial" in nature and ALWAYS exist. the only difference here is that they wish to define them better. Currently, your posts are subject to DJ and Steph's "Artificial Rules" that if you didn't follow, they would take action. The difference is that Dj and Steph RARELY take action, but they do, if needed.

Now, why not wait until you see the written rules before you object to them. No matter where you are in person or on the internet, there are rules for conduct. I know it is illegal to yell "fire" in a crowded theater if no fire exists. It is illegal to jokingly or seriously discuss hijacking an airplane while at an airport.

Anyway, I hope you stay here but I really don't understand your objection until the rules are defined and you have a specific rule to disagree with.

I hope this didn't come off antagonistic. It was more meant as a question to your objection.

I am in.

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You've overstayed your welcome since the day we met but it doesn't seem to matter to you. No medications are your master, nothing makes you fret, it's a helpless feeling having nothing I can do

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LeLimey Ex Member	Re: Okay - moving forward. Reply #24 - Nov 21^st, 2008 at 4:32pm The point I think some are missing is that this is something we need to DISCUSS and AGREE on - it's not a dictatorship and it's not a fait accompli. This is something EVERYONE is welcome to contribute to with idea's What we need is suggestions, thoughts, experiences and to draw a concensus from that.
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