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tessistired

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Take it one day at a time!

Posts: 203
Twin Cities, MN
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My Mom has past away
Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:03pm

Last night some time after 9pm est my mom passed away. She was only 62 yrs old...to turn 63 new years eve. It was expected because my mom had a massive heart attack the morn of Nov 6, a month and half ago, and has been in a coma ever since. Initially when she had her heart attack she had to have her heart shocked twice. Her neurologist said from the beginning that she went to long without any blood or o2 to her brain although they werent sure exactly how long.

My dad, sister and I were hoping shed wake up within the first week or so but no such luck. She was on a ventilator and feeding tube until a week and a few days ago. My mom whos name is Bernadette, did not want to be kept on any kind of machines for any reason whatsoever. Then after meeting with the ethics committee they decided to let the family fulfill my moms wishes and take her off the machines. So last night she went up to heaven to be with her mother. That gives me some peace. But despite knowing her condition and efforts to prepare for her passing...its way harder than i ever anticipated. I cannot stop crying and I still have my 2 kids to tell. they were aware of their grandma too. We actually got to go to New York right after Thanksgiving to see my mom in the hospital and say our goodbyes. I thought that would help. Maybe some it did I dont know. At this very moment it doesnt seem to have.

I dont mean to keep rambling on but thank you for letting me. Ive dealt with death before a long time ago but no one I was so close to. I know time will heal all wounds but in the meantime I really dont know how to handle my moms passing.

Well I dont know what else to say except thank you for being here for me and any prayers would be appreciated. I am just glad my mom isnt suffering anymore... also very glad that she was not alone when she did pass. My dad was with her holding her hand. It was past visiting hours and my dad knew she wasnt doing well so the nurses let my dad stay. Thank the lord for that.

Many Blessings to you and yours

Tess

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Frank_W CH.com Alumnus Offline BOHICA!!! Posts: 4213 Right behind you... Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #1 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:08pm ((HUGGGGG)) My condolences to you, the rest of her family, and her loved ones.
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Mrs Deej YaBB Administrator Offline My life is what I make it, and it's beautiful! Posts: 1348 Tornado Alley Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #2 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:11pm All our thoughts and prayers to you and your family!! So sorry to hear of your loss.
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seasonalboomer CH.com Hall of Famer Offline CH messes with my isness Posts: 2517 Charlotte, NC Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #3 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:11pm My condolences to you and your family. As much as you can be "prepared", a loss is a loss. It will creep into your life in ways that you may never have imagined, find ways to embrace the memories. Scott
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deltadarlin CH.com Alumnus Offline I love YaBB 1G - SP1! Posts: 3823 Downsville LA Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #4 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:18pm Tess, I am so sorry. My heart goes out to you and your family. Carolyn
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Redd CH.com Sponsor Offline Posts: 8457 Stevens Point USA Wisconsin Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #5 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:18pm Oh Tess I'm so heartfelt sorry for your family's loss. Please let us know if there is anything we can do. Pegg
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Melissa CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Don't give up! Posts: 7238 Central WI, USA Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #6 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:20pm Oh Tess, my heart goes out to you and your family. You have my sympathies and prayers. I am so very sorry for your loss. love, mel
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Jimi CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Don't feed the moderators Posts: 4925 Madisonville, KY Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #7 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:22pm M condolences on the lost of your mother Tess.
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Jeannie CH.com Sponsor Offline Live, Laugh, Love.... Posts: 2333 St Louis, Missouri Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #8 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:24pm Oh Tess, I'm so sorry, honey. It is so hard to loose your Mom. Mine has been gone for five years and I miss her every day. Time will ease the raw hurt that you feel, though. My condolences to you and your family. Jeannie
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Jackie CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Go For It!!! Posts: 5903 Goshen, IN Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #9 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:38pm Tess, I'm so very sorry to hear of your loss. This is a very hard. My heart goes out to you. Deepest condolences to you and your family. Much Love, Jackie
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echo CH.com Alumnus Offline Chronic and still alive --- I Win! Posts: 4544 Overland Park, KS Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #10 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 4:53pm So sorry to read of your loss. Deepest condolences to you and the other family members. Very tough time of year for this type of an event.
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Grandma_Sweet_Boy CH.com Alumnus Offline What Goes Around Comes Around! Posts: 4496 Georgetown,Ontario Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #11 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 5:00pm Tess - sending hugs and condolences for you and your family. Carol
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Just Plain Carl CH.com Old Timer Offline IT IS WHAT IT IS Posts: 449 Royal Oak, Michigan Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #12 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 5:00pm My deepest condolences to you and your family.
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Linda_Howell CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Do not feed the Moderators Posts: 11927 Santa Maria, Ca. Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #13 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 5:01pm Oh Tess, I am so very sorry sweetie. Losing your Mom is gut-wrenching. Can you share some memories of her with us. I'd love to hear about this wonderful woman. Linda
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Mosaicwench

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Re: My Mom has past away
Reply #14 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 5:04pm

Aw Tess, I'm so very sorry. I lost my mom at 59 and there's just no easy way to lose someone when you're not done with them yet.

All I can tell you is that you will adapt to it over many years. You won't get over the missing her part, you'll just start making new memories without her.

Please accept my deepest condolences on you and your family's loss.
I will lift you all up in prayers to make it through the Holidays and beyond. One step at a time.

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maalstroom

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the hell I will!

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Re: My Mom has past away
Reply #15 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 5:15pm

Jesus Christ Tess, I feel so very very deeply for you. I know what it is to loose your mum at a way too young age from personal experience, as she was 4 weeks from turning 58. She had throatcancer.

I also know what it is to take her off the machinery. It was the hardest decision me, my siblings and my dad ever had to make.

All I can say is, that my heart is there with you right now, even though we do not know eachother personally. But please know that you are in my thoughts.

With deepest condoleances, Pascal.

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...AND AS A FINISHING TOUCH, GOD CREATED THE DUTCH.

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George CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Black-Billed Magpie Posts: 8126 Boise, Idaho USA Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #16 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 5:29pm I'm so very sorry to hear this, Tess. My sincere condolences to you and your family. All the best, George
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barry_sword CH.com Alumnus Offline Mountain Biking Keeps Me Sane Posts: 3947 Bracebridge, Canada Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #17 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 5:38pm Our deepest condolences to you and your family Tess, so very sorry for the loss of your Mom. B&A
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kayarr

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Re: My Mom has past away
Reply #18 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 5:40pm

Tess,

I am so sad to hear that news. Even with all the "she's better off", "she's not suffering" or whatever it doesn't make the missing them any easier. Let yourself cry. It's therapuetic. Gather with family soon and remember things that make you happy about your Mom. You will carry parts of her forward and pass it onto your own children and anyone you come in contact with.

(((((Tess and Family)))))

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Nothing is impossible! Just believe!!!!!

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Rolomatic Ex Member	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #19 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 5:46pm Tess, My utmost condolences to you and your family on the unfortunate turn of events. ((((((HUGS)))))), Roland.
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Cathi_Pierce

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I love YaBB 1G - SP1!

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Re: My Mom has past away
Reply #20 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 6:11pm

Tess, I've said it before, it's not the person who leaves us...she is out of pain and into a wonderful place. It is those who are left behind, trying to cope with the hole in our world.
I lost my mom last yeasr, and just lost my Grandmother Halloween.......the Holidays are pretty odd this year, but we will get through them. Once done, we will continue to replace our sadness with fond memories of the people who have left us.
I wish you this......and some time to get to that point.

I wish I could give you a big hug right now.........

My deepest sympathy, Tess,
Cathi Undecided

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cynjeep89

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Re: My Mom has past away
Reply #21 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 6:20pm

Tess,

I am so sorry to hear of your Mom's passing. Your heart must feel like it is breaking into pieces.

She raised you to be a caring, sensitive and loving person...I can read this in your post.

Hold her memories close to your heart and smile when you think of her.

Please let your family know we are also thinking of them.

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MITYRARE CH.com Old Timer Offline autocross racer Posts: 361 Ontario, Canada Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #22 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 6:55pm So sorry for your loss. My prayers are with your family. Paul
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Artonio

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I Love

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New Castle, Pa
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Re: My Mom has past away
Reply #23 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 7:34pm

Tess... I know how very much you loved your mom... and from our conversations I know how very much you meant to each other.

There are no words that will suffice to patch the huge hole left from your mom's passing. Just remember how much she loved you.

I wish these pixels could truly convey how sorry I am for your loss. I wish I could make it easier for you somehow. Mercifully, time will pass and the ache will be replaced by the warmth of the memories.

Keep the memory of your moms loving spirit alive with the gentle way that you have of loving your children.

I pray that you will be given the strength and courage that you need during this time and I trust that my prayers will be answered.

with warm regards,
Tony

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For in our hands lies the ability to shape our world for good or for ill. President Barack Obama

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Kevin_M CH.com Sponsor Offline withered branches grow green again. Posts: 8754 Michigan, USA Gender:	Re: My Mom has past away Reply #24 - Dec 15^th, 2008 at 7:41pm Sorry to hear, Tess. My condolences to you and your family through your times for her.
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