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Reason: ch? (Read 3326 times)

sandie99

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it - inspite the pain!

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Reason: ch?
Jan 7^th, 2009 at 1:35pm

I got email from my ex recently and among other things he wrote that he considers my ch being one of the reasons why we broke up.

I felt: excuse me, what?

I do know why I wanted to break up with him and ch does not make that list. His behaviour during my last cycle had nothing to do with being a supporter, though, and that I consider to be play a part in our break up.

I can only imagine what kind of hell you supporters go through and you have my humble thankyous for being there in so many, many ways. During that year and 7 months I lived with my ex I did my best to protect him for being affected by my ch and dealed with it all on my own. I did ask him to get me energy drink once when work didn't allow me to do that. I know that he hated doing that one favour, but that was the only time his life was clearly inconvenienced by ch directly. I'm sure that, at times, just knowing that I'm in pain was enough...

Still... At this point it's kind of strange to call ch a reason for our break up - he sure didn't bring it up when we discussed these things through last year.

Sanna

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Linda_Howell

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Re: Reason: ch?
Reply #1 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 1:52pm

Quote:

I did ask him to get me energy drink once when work didn't allow me to do that. I know that he hated doing that one favour, but that was the only time his life was clearly inconvenienced by ch directly

WOW, Sanna. I am speechless. What a sacrifice he had to make there. (sarcasm) I am so sorry, but someone will come into your life that will love you for who you are NOT because you are free of any health problems.

There are many here, who have lost friends, wives, husbands or Significant others because of CH. I would tell them to not let the door hit you on the way out. But that's just me.

Incredible.

Hurt people.....hurt people. Think about it.

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gizmo CH.com Hall of Famer Offline Posts: 522 Germany Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #2 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 1:56pm His argumentation sounds childish to me. Breaking up due to a medical condition - sorry I can't get that. Oliver
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Racer1_NC CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline "Well, let's go see." Posts: 4417 Lewisville, NC Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #3 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:02pm Convenient excuse. Also a load of Multimedia File Viewing and Clickable Links are available for Registered Members only!! You need to or . He's attempting to transfer the blame from himself to you. B
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Frank_W CH.com Alumnus Offline BOHICA!!! Posts: 4213 Right behind you... Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #4 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:05pm Racer1_NC wrote on Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:02pm: Convenient excuse. Also a load of i20.photobucket.com/albums/b206/Racer1_NC/Smilies/willybs.gif. He's attempting to transfer the blame from himself to you. B ^^^THIS!!! Tell him that Jesus hates a pvssy and that for his next girlfriend's sake, you hope he grows a set of balls.
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Redd

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Re: Reason: ch?
Reply #5 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:05pm

I don't know all that was discussed over the time the two of you were together Sanna, but I have a very strong "gut" feeling about his email.

When a person is uncomfortable dealing and/or admitting to their part in any situation, they tend to prey on the other person's strongest fears, or easiest emotional target.

He said this to take your focus off the failure of the relationship and the part he played...and have you focus on your fear and doubt over CH.

Pathetic ploy if you ask me.

Love to you dear Sanna...stay the strong, smart woman you are. Don't fall for this game.

Pegg

"The goal of life living in agreement with Nature." ~Zeno

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DennisM1045

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Re: Reason: ch?
Reply #6 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:14pm

Sanna,

You are so much more than CH. Don't ever forget that. Timo is just trying to deflect attention from his own failings in the relationship.

Anyone who whould complain about picking up an energy drink doesn't sound like someone you should be spending your life with anyway.

Don't look back hon. Only look forward...

(((HUGS)))

-Dennis-

Where there is life, there is hope.
Where there is Oxygen, you must use proper caution.
So be safe, don't smoke while using O2. Kill the pain and not yourself.

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Lenny CH.com Alumnus Offline I love YaBB 1G - SP1! Posts: 642 Los Angeles,CA Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #7 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:17pm Sanna, He sounds like a child with tiny testicle syndrome.....You sound like a very beautiful person and in do time will meet a very nice man.....In the mean time take care of yourself and everything will follow.....with much respect.....Lenny
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midwestbeth CH.com Sponsor Offline Posts: 1123 Edwardsville, IL Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #8 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:25pm You deserve better Sanna. Beth
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Em CH.com Alumnus Offline I wanna go... Posts: 830 St Peter Port, Guernsey. Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #9 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 3:39pm Just further confirmation for you that what you did was right for you and you need never look back and wonder 'what if...'. He wasn't good enough for you anyway.
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Jackie CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Go For It!!! Posts: 5903 Goshen, IN Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #10 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 3:48pm Shame on him, Sanna. That is a pitiful and 'sissy' excuse. You will find better. He doesn't deserve a wonderful, sweet and pretty girl like you. I've been a supporter for years so this is my response to another supporter who would write such an email.........Piss off, Timo
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Charlotte CH.com Alumnus Offline Posts: 2385 Patterson,California Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #11 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 3:58pm Sanna, if you love someone, you love them. He didn't love you and that is his loss. You are a treasure. Charlotte
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Jeannie CH.com Sponsor Offline Live, Laugh, Love.... Posts: 2333 St Louis, Missouri Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #12 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 4:04pm Em wrote on Jan 7^th, 2009 at 3:39pm: Just further confirmation for you that what you did was right for you and you need never look back and wonder 'what if...'. He wasn't good enough for you anyway. I agree completely! You are indeed a treasure. Your true love is out there. Chin up, sweetie! Jeannie
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Melissa

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Re: Reason: ch?
Reply #13 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 5:28pm

Em wrote on Jan 7^th, 2009 at 3:39pm:

Just further confirmation for you that what you did was right for you and you need never look back and wonder 'what if...'.

He wasn't good enough for you anyway. Wink

Another ditto to what Em posted!!

I'm glad you are no longer with him, he has shown he'd never be a life partner anyway!

love you Sanna!

Diseases can be our spiritual flat tires - disruptions in our lives that seem to be disasters at the time but end by redirecting our lives in a meaningful way. ~Bernie S. Siegel

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Kirk CH.com Alumnus Offline VINIMUS, VIDIMUS, DOLAVIMUS Posts: 2393 Harts Lake, WA Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #14 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 7:14pm *He really needs to seek some professional help and get his egg candled. You are well rid of that May he never darken your door step again.*
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barry_sword CH.com Alumnus Offline Mountain Biking Keeps Me Sane Posts: 3947 Bracebridge, Canada Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #15 - Jan 7^th, 2009 at 7:32pm Sanna, I think he was just trying to mess with you by throwing in about your CH's. Ignore it and move on. Mr. right might be just around the next corner!
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UnderTheRadar CH.com Old Timer Offline Literally Posts: 383 Texas Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #16 - Jan 8^th, 2009 at 2:21am I think you should write him back a kind, well-thought-out reply whereby you thank him for his honesty and wish him well in finding an equally compassionate woman who will love him despite his inadequate penis.
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phil_h

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one day at a time , one
headache at a time.....

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Re: Reason: ch?
Reply #17 - Jan 8^th, 2009 at 3:29am

Men have 150 ways to avoid or withdraw from intimate relationships .They are both threatening and real . They tend to lead to the other big problem males deal or don't with ..... commitment ............... All men claim to really want a meanful intimate relationship and the commitment to grow with it : however men have all these self sabatage techniques , that often project why it's not working ...onto the woman ... Men have real problems additting they are unable or unwilling to stand still , by yourside and grow through intimacy and commitment .................... The sooner you discover this , the better . He may not be unable ...... but unwilling ; he may not be unwilling.... but unable ...................... For an ongoing supportive relationship to continue to grow , it reguires willingness to be vulnerable , emotionally present and love unconditionally and be able and willing. Life is a game of %'s . If a couple can do that 65% of the time they have chance ...... Remember , men emotionally are the weaker sex from the stand point of a fragile ego structure . Fight or flight some times kicks in when we feel threatened.... even if a not real threat ....... false pride and ego take over and we may run ....then justify our leaving by telling you about your fault in this ...................... Courage my dear Sandy....... you deserve a man willing to stand still ,love you unconditionally and grow in intimacy while discovering each other together . There no simple formula for finding this man................. sometimes your soul and emotional presence may help the man discover his inner courage to be real and discover the true joy of intimacy ............................................He was inconvienced to go get you any energy drink ? You deserve much better .... You need to stay focused on your soulmate is out there and you will find him . Let go of expectations ....... And when you no longer seek him , he will discover you ...............Your sadness and disappointment are real , but like our CH's ... they pass .... Best of life still ahead................. phil h

Angels are among us ........beasts beware !!!!!!

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LeLimey

Ex Member

Re: Reason: ch?
Reply #18 - Jan 8^th, 2009 at 6:49am

Sanna we belong to the same been there done that club now. That's EXACTLY what I was told. He was sick of me being sick (before I got whats wrong with me now, then I only had CH and the bone disease) and he also said he'd never forgive me for giving Jasper CH.

Turns out he was having an affair and passing the buck.

What everyone else has said is true. He is trying to make you feel bad to cover his own inadequacies.

I'd send him back a nice email saying you thank him for his enlighening comments. You would like to assure him however that painfree time from CH has now imporved in quality by a hundred per cent since you no longer have to tolerate the pain in your arse that you lived with.

love to you and a plague of boils on him! (And I can y'know! Wink

)
Helen xxx

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flipperlips

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Re: Reason: ch?
Reply #19 - Jan 8^th, 2009 at 8:17am

sandie99 wrote on Jan 7^th, 2009 at 1:35pm:

Another ditto what Em said.

Oh Sanna what a pathetic excuse of a person he is. If you really love someone when they are in pain you will try to move heaven and earth to get them whatever they need.

Only one life.....only one chance to make the moment count for something - Racer1_NC

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Frank_W CH.com Alumnus Offline BOHICA!!! Posts: 4213 Right behind you... Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #20 - Jan 8^th, 2009 at 8:46am UnderTheRadar wrote on Jan 8^th, 2009 at 2:21am: I think you should write him back a kind, well-thought-out reply whereby you thank him for his honesty and wish him well in finding an equally compassionate woman who will love him despite his inadequate penis. BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I LOVE IT!!!
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kayarr

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Re: Reason: ch?
Reply #21 - Jan 8^th, 2009 at 10:35am

Frank_W wrote on Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:05pm:

Racer1_NC wrote on Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:02pm:

Convenient excuse. Also a load of i20.photobucket.com/albums/b206/Racer1_NC/Smilies/willybs.gif.

He's attempting to transfer the blame from himself to you.

B

^^^THIS!!!

Tell him that Jesus hates a pvssy and that for his next girlfriend's sake, you hope he grows a set of balls.

I like your style:)

Nothing is impossible! Just believe!!!!!

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kayarr

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Re: Reason: ch?
Reply #22 - Jan 8^th, 2009 at 11:08am

Sanna,

I am sorry you are hurting. What Phil H said was very true.

From everything I know about you , you are open, loving, caring, intelligent, giving, thoughtful, creative.......(this list was getting long:) You get the point. Heal up a bit and believe there is someone out there just for you. He will see all of the wonder that is Sanna and be amazed that you even looked his way;

Love you,
Kimberly

Nothing is impossible! Just believe!!!!!

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Frank_W

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BOHICA!!!

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Re: Reason: ch?
Reply #23 - Jan 8^th, 2009 at 11:54am

kayarr wrote on Jan 8^th, 2009 at 10:35am:

Frank_W wrote on Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:05pm:

Racer1_NC wrote on Jan 7^th, 2009 at 2:02pm:

Convenient excuse. Also a load of i20.photobucket.com/albums/b206/Racer1_NC/Smilies/willybs.gif.

He's attempting to transfer the blame from himself to you.

B

^^^THIS!!!

Tell him that Jesus hates a pvssy and that for his next girlfriend's sake, you hope he grows a set of balls.

I like your style:)

Thanks!

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Grandma_Sweet_Boy CH.com Alumnus Offline What Goes Around Comes Around! Posts: 4496 Georgetown,Ontario Gender:	Re: Reason: ch? Reply #24 - Jan 8^th, 2009 at 1:31pm The guy's a write off, Sanna. You deserve so much better and you will indeed find that special someone. Hugs Carol
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