hi there clusterheads... and so it begins again.. i've been 18 months of pfd (see.. i've read the acronyms..lol) i had begun to hope that after 20 years they were finally going.. (and i'm only 39!) i was only properly diagnosed during that last attack, and i went to the migraine clinic in london.. the expert there contacted my gp and when i visit the gp i can be prescribed the medication that is for heart problems (i've forgotten the name) have any of you had this treatment? i was told i would have regular heartrate monitors to make sure i don't have an  over-reaction to the meds.. to be honest i'm hesitating and procrastinating out of fear and ignorance, i've battled for so long without medication and i keep fooling myself that the current mild start will not continue into the full blown cluster period, but we all know thats self delusion right? my mind is going into overdrive, and this morning i woke at 5am with the beginnings but only lasted 45 mins and didn't progress... i'm strong willed and a fighter, but you guys know the score... fear and anticipation have me tearful and full of dread... i will now be on 24hr alert and afraid to sleep... i guess not feeling alone helps.. which is why i've finally joined the site.. i actually believed i was no longer a clusterhead! how wrong i was... look forward to some chats etc to ease the blinding and searing echo of this damnation...

verapamil... thats what the doc is ready to give me...

can't tell you the feeling just from another sufferer acknowledging me.. have suffered alone for so long and never met or spoke to a fellow clusterhead in my life, i really didn't anticipate the feeling that there is a community of us and it feels like a weight has been lifted from me.... thankyou..

thanks linda.. you know.. i really do feel that.. everyone has been so kind and giving.. and i'm gonna demand that oxygen! armed with knowledge!