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Kirk CH.com Alumnus Offline VINIMUS, VIDIMUS, DOLAVIMUS Posts: 2393 Harts Lake, WA Gender:	Re: Needing your help... Reply #50 - Jul 16^th, 2009 at 3:27pm Prayers from my house to yours man. I almost decided to go bald and gray when the docs said that to me in 82. Hang in there, when i get back to the GPNW I'll stop by and we can go over to Arther's or someplace and talk about it over a pounder or two. If I can get by Cathi and the rest of the mob in Portland.
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Lefty CH.com Alumnus Offline Posts: 759 Gender:	Re: Needing your help... Reply #51 - Jul 16^th, 2009 at 6:25pm Sending big positive vibes your way Jon.... Lefty...!
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Charlie CH.com Alumnus Offline Happy to be here Posts: 18971 Jamestown, NY Gender:	Re: Needing your help... Reply #52 - Jul 16^th, 2009 at 8:07pm Good to hear from you and that as Brew said: you are learning something new about it. Lots of vibes and even prayer or two. Charlie
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jon019

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #53 - Jul 16^th, 2009 at 9:03pm

Oh man are you guys inspirational...

Brew...spot on...fear of the unknown is damned tough, and I thought the same thing...next time, I'm still gonna be scared...but not so much...

Lefty... I feel 'em bro...thank you

Kirk, I'm ALREADY bald and gray....especially my ridiculous beard...which everyone hates and would be happy to see gone...myself, I just hate shaving...

Charlie...you are always there...thank you..

NOT forgetting NOBODY here...vibes, prayers, thoughts...I got 'em all...scared? yes...give up (as a company owner told me...THAT'S no fun!) No it's NOT... Thank you all....

Best,

Jon
I am in good hands

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Linda_Howell

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #54 - Jul 16^th, 2009 at 9:16pm

The next time you go, as well as the first time you went....you had the prayers, good wishes and concerns of at least 50 people here that have never even met you, but consider you part of this family.

I have watched the power of prayer here and it is amazing. The next time you walk through those doors you are walking through them with about 50 angels right behind you.

I love ya Jon. Don't be scared, you're going to be all right.

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Melissa CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Don't give up! Posts: 7238 Central WI, USA Gender:	Re: Needing your help... Reply #55 - Jul 16^th, 2009 at 10:15pm Jon
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jon019

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #56 - Jul 16^th, 2009 at 10:26pm

Linda_Howell wrote on Jul 16^th, 2009 at 9:16pm:

The next time you go, as well as the first time you went....you had the prayers, good wishes and concerns of at least 50 people here that have never even met you, but consider you part of this family.

Gee Linda...you almost made me cry and I haven't done that (yet). Felt 'em all...every last one...not sure I could have done it without. It's an AMAZING family...

I have watched the power of prayer here and it is amazing. The next time you walk through those doors you are walking through them with about 50 angels right behind you.

Yup, know it...and no burden on the shoulders...more like "a wind behind my back"...

I love ya Jon. Don't be scared, you're going to be all right.

Thanks Linda...I love ya all too...it is humbling...

Now then, this has all been about me...and that is not me. Where I went is affiliated with Children's Hospital. While there, I saw folks who are dealing with a nightmare I cannot even imagine....children with cancer. Passed by one Mom comforting a 6 yr old...bald and obviously hurting.... Mom smiled at me...and I swear, that smile said, "hiya, really hope you are going to be ok". I can only hope that my return smile said the same for her baby...damn, this is tough...said I wasn't going to cry...be back later...

sorry, I hate this shit...it is trying on the soul. I'll be ok, am praying for those little ones right now...

Best,

Jon

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Linda_Howell

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #57 - Jul 16^th, 2009 at 10:35pm

Quote:

While there, I saw folks who are dealing with a nightmare I cannot even imagine....children with cancer. Passed by one Mom comforting a 6 yr old...bald and obviously hurting.... Mom smiled at me...

and you know what Jon? Ypou just shared one of the most intimate moments 2 human beings can ever share. You are a lucky man.

Most cannot even comprehend what you felt that day.

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Callico

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #58 - Jul 17^th, 2009 at 11:09pm

We went through a similar experience 9 yrs ago with our daughter having to have surgery. There were a number of children there who were suffering with cancer. It really brings one's own problems into perspective. You know I'm not diminishing your, Jon, but as you recognized you are not alone in that fight any more than you are alone in your CH fight. You do have an advantage of the support of this family that a lot of those there do not have. I'll pray for them too.

Jerry

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jon019

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #59 - Jul 30^th, 2009 at 8:27pm

Hello All,

I am so grateful for the support and prayers and pm's and and and...it's truly humbling...I'm not sure how to respond adequately...

The least I can do is give an update:

Last week went in for a PET/CT...today for the results:

Doc said: no surprises here, it's stage IV (there aint no V) lymphoma....sounds bad...it is...BUT, he also said it is SLOW growing and I think we should consider "watchful waiting". He did give other options...seems docs these days don't want to tell you what to do (malpractice suits?) so want YOU to decide. I would have been comfortable being told what to do...but it's not to be. Will be going back in 6 weeks (he said 12, I said, I wasn't comfortable with that).

Now, in my job(s) (tenant mgr) I have had to develop the ability to read between the lines...so I listened VERY carefully. I heard and saw the msg among the 3 options he gave...this was it...

I have decided (DEEP breath) to go with the "watchful waiting"...because, as he said, "as miserable as you are now, it sure won't be any better with chemo (and delay will not affect ultimate survival)...and also, we can shrink your lymph nodes with several types of treatments, but you will still have lymphoma, I would prefer to save those bullets" (not all this stated, but definitely implied). This is an illness that WILL re occur, it might be better to delay THAT as long as possible."

I'm still scared spitless, but research has shown that he is very good at what he does...and most of the people working there I've met are cancer survivors ( a real dedicated bunch). They all tell me...you are in the right place.

Dang, I hope I've made the right choice....going to have to trust him...

Best,

Jon

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Melissa CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Don't give up! Posts: 7238 Central WI, USA Gender:	Re: Needing your help... Reply #60 - Jul 30^th, 2009 at 8:49pm Jon, I am so glad that you have a good doctor to work with you. That's one thing I would want if this happened to me. Sounds like it's low grade due to the slowness. That'd be a GOOD thing! I wish you lived closer, I'd love to come visit and hug your neck!!! Big huge hugs, prayers and strength for you my friend. mel
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Linda_Howell

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #61 - Jul 30^th, 2009 at 8:53pm

Quote:

I'm still scared spitless,

and if it's o.k. with you we will be scared shitless with you.

You know what though Jon? The odds, are really in your favor. This group of ours and our prayers work wonders...The candles I lite for you almost every single night consist of a heartfelt prayer sent to God for you.

You are in good hands my friend. You really are.

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LeLimey Ex Member	Re: Needing your help... Reply #62 - Jul 30^th, 2009 at 9:41pm We're scared too Jon, you're "ours - you're "mine" and you know it. We all, especially me, need you here for a long long time to come and we aren't letting you go anywhere - got that??! Sending all the love I can Helen xxxxx
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Callico CH.com Hall of Famer Offline Author of "Stranded at Romson's Lodge Posts: 4916 Aurora IL Gender:	Re: Needing your help... Reply #63 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 1:37am You have our prayers. I've seen God do some really miraculous things, and have learned to trust Him, specially when I have no idea what else to do. Jerry
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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #64 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 9:48am

Well now you know exactly what it is and what stage it is in. Be your own health advocate. Research and read until you know all about what you have. It sounds like your doc knows what he is doing.

For me, I always get a second opinion (my insurance pays for it) But if you have studied this cancer and are comfortable with his plan to fight it, then that is important.

Good luck in your future fight and ask God to walk with you through this.

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LadyLuv

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #65 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 10:29am

My Dearest Jon...

I guess I'm the odd ball of the CH family. Unlike some, I am neither scared, nor am I worried regarding you beating this thing... What I am: IS PRAYING! Being a 25yrs Breast Cancer Survivor, I know that God is a healer and that He does answer Prayers. I live under the philosophy: "If you're going to worry, don't Pray and If you're going to Pray, don't worry; God can and God will heal you.

I will continue to keep you in my daily Prayers as well as add your name to our Church Prayer List...

Peace & Blessings
Lady Luv

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Charlie CH.com Alumnus Offline Happy to be here Posts: 18971 Jamestown, NY Gender:	Re: Needing your help... Reply #66 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 8:24pm I'm scared too Jon but "watchful waiting" is something that is used all the time for some cancers. When it comes to prostate for example, its what they do....more than a lot of the time. Sometimes that's all they do. Just thought you'd like to know and more vibes and prayers for you. Charlie
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Lefty CH.com Alumnus Offline Posts: 759 Gender:	Re: Needing your help... Reply #67 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 8:35pm Quote: you are in the right place. Some good news right there Jon.... Still sending those positive vibes from across the Atlantic. Lefty...!
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jon019

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #68 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 9:42pm

Oh golly...I am overwhelmed....

It has been said that you REALLY know your friends when you need their help vs when they need yours...

I'm a REAL quiet guy...what I have presented here for your'all review is not like me...but, I believe I was GUIDED to do it. My basic philosophy has always been the "golden rule". Didn't even matter to me if that was reciprocated or not....it was good enough for me.

Based on that, and my own personality, I tentatively shared my own dilemma. Actually, it started as just trying to explain my recent "different" behavior".

The reaction was STUNNING....my friends and colleagues reacted like I had bestowed a gift by reporting my problems Huh

...and offers of help I will need, but would never ask for....still trying to wrap my mind around that one....the only thing I can figure is that what goes around comes around....I don't know, I really don't...

I am just so grateful for you'all and them all...it is an eye opener. I've tried to make a difference in peoples lives....it just never registered until I needed "help"...Linda called me a lucky man...until I got sick, I don't think I really realized how true that was...oh my...

And, HEY, if all this sounds like self indulgent crap...well, it is...been into myself lately...I'll do better...

And HEY again, I will be answering your posts...not technologically proficient enough to quote multiple posts in one (I'm jealous of those who can)...so apologies for multiple posts....To those I do not specifically mention...."no worries" as an Aussie might say...you are ALL dear to my heart...

Best,

Jon

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jon019

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #69 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 9:57pm

Melissa wrote on Jul 30^th, 2009 at 8:49pm:

Jon, I am so glad that you have a good doctor to work with you. That's one thing I would want if this happened to me.

Sounds like it's low grade due to the slowness. That'd be a GOOD thing!

I wish you lived closer, I'd love to come visit and hug your neck!!! Big huge hugs, prayers and strength for you my friend.

Smiley

mel

Gee Mel...I'm NOT gonna bawl...REALLY...oh damn...

THANK YOU,

Jon

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jon019

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #70 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 10:09pm

Linda_Howell wrote on Jul 30^th, 2009 at 8:53pm:

Quote:

I'm still scared spitless,

and if it's o.k. with you we will be scared shitless with you.

You know what though Jon? The odds, are really in your favor. This group of ours and our prayers work wonders...The candles I lite for you almost every single night consist of a heartfelt prayer sent to God for you.

You are in good hands my friend. You really are.

I KNOW it Linder...I KNOW it...haven't had a candle lit for me since I don't know when....THANK YOU!!!!

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The LARGE print giveth....and the small print taketh away. Tom Waits

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jon019 CH.com Alumnus Offline "Ya gotta believe!" Posts: 1656 USA Gender:	Re: Needing your help... Reply #71 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 10:11pm Quote: We're scared too Jon, you're "ours - you're "mine" and you know it. We all, especially me, need you here for a long long time to come and we aren't letting you go anywhere - got that??! Sending all the love I can Helen xxxxx Got my marching orders dear...I WILL be ok...I know that... Best, Jon
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jon019 CH.com Alumnus Offline "Ya gotta believe!" Posts: 1656 USA Gender:	Re: Needing your help... Reply #72 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 10:15pm Callico wrote on Jul 31^st, 2009 at 1:37am: You have our prayers. I've seen God do some really miraculous things, and have learned to trust Him, specially when I have no idea what else to do. Jerry It is amazing what we DON'T know...but what I DO know is that prayers work...I've seen it...THANK YOU Jerry... Best, Jon
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jon019

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #73 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 10:33pm

Jimi wrote on Jul 31^st, 2009 at 9:48am:

Well now you know exactly what it is and what stage it is in. Be your own health advocate. Research and read until you know all about what you have. It sounds like your doc knows what he is doing.

For me, I always get a second opinion (my insurance pays for it) But if you have studied this cancer and are comfortable with his plan to fight it, then that is important.

Good luck in your future fight and ask God to walk with you through this.

Yo Jimi,

Got it bro...I'm thinking good doc. The ONLY one who has EVER asked if my insurance was doing me right (nope, but I'm fighting that)...also offered reference to a "naturopath" for the fatigue (without prompting)...not my style, but damn, he offered !!!!

The diagnosis HAS been confirmed with a second opinion...the treatment NOT...but I trust him (see above). Insurance co may require one (hey, whatever, they haven't given a damn yet, so not holding my breath)...we'll see...

THANK YOU...

Best,

Jon

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jon019

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Re: Needing your help...
Reply #74 - Jul 31^st, 2009 at 10:53pm

LadyLuv wrote on Jul 31^st, 2009 at 10:29am:

My Dearest Jon...

I guess I'm the odd ball of the CH family. Unlike some, I am neither scared, nor am I worried regarding you beating this thing... What I am: IS PRAYING! Being a 25yrs Breast Cancer Survivor, I know that God is a healer and that He does answer Prayers. I live under the philosophy: "If you're going to worry, don't Pray and If you're going to Pray, don't worry; God can and God will heal you.

I will continue to keep you in my daily Prayers as well as add your name to our Church Prayer List...

Peace & Blessings
Lady Luv

Dang Ruthie...you're gonna make me cry too...being on a prayer list is something I've needed for years...I am eternally grateful, and bear in mind, everyone else on that list has got my prayers too...

Best,

Jon

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The LARGE print giveth....and the small print taketh away. Tom Waits

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