1.)   Are your headaches so severe you wouldn't wish them on either Osama bin Laden or Chuckles?

a.   yes - go to Question 2.

b.   no - hit Paypal then "delete profile" because we've cured you.


Having been offered an aspirin and a nice lie down, would you consider your dis-memberment of another human being -

a.   justifiable homicide

b.   an improvement to the overall gene pool

c.   perfectly natural behaviour

d.   all of the above.


3.)   Do the words 'Oh, I get headaches, too' cause -

a.   your bile to rise

b.   your fists to curl

c.   your teeth to take on a life of their own which can only be sustained by the neck-blood of the speaker.


4.)   Having been refused O2 at ER because you're obviously a druggie, do you feel -

a.   resentful

b.   pained

c.   glad your private nuclear stash is bigger the Cuba's.


5.)   Do you think Mrs Deej's decision to decline the Miss Universe title was because -

a.   she loves us

b.   she's to busy

c.   the follicularly-challenged wants his coffee now!


6.)   Are your headaches in any way affected by -

a.   election results

b.   taxation requirements

c.   colonoscopies

d.   love letters from Chuck.


7.)   Choose your reward!!

a.   $8,376,892,412.67 for creating world peace

b.   $6,734,645,137.23 for hacking into Barack's black-berry

c.   $9,578,472,176.95 for linking Dolly Parton's in-bedroom camera to ch.com

d.   $1.03 for curing CH.


8.)   At the start of a new cycle, which is most important -

a.   ensuring you have fingernail polish to suit every occasion

b.   checking roof and guttering is clean and secure

c.   Writing to your senator deploring lax sentencing of graffiti vandals

d.   sending all your beer to AB's Eco-friendly Recyclers so as to avoid temptation.


9.)   If you had the choice of losing your headaches forever or spending one night with LeLimey, which would you pick?


10.)  Having now been diagnosed as a CHead, do you feel the need to -

a.   chop off your head and donate it to science

b.   sell your children into slavery, catch syphilus and incur the wrath of God

c.   reply to Chuck's letters

d.   send beer to Australia.