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DennisM1045

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One wave at a time!

Posts: 3437
Haverhill, Massachusetts, USA
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Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead
Aug 14^th, 2010 at 12:36pm

Isn't it funny how the human mind works (or doesn't) when it comes to pain. You find something, you take it, and the pain disappears. For months. Then you begin to think.

Did that actually work?
Is it really gone?
Is this just a remission?
Have I found my "magic bullet"?
After a few months true denial sets in: Did I really have it in the first place?
You get busy living your life and actually allow yourself to forget that there is a timebomb waiting to go off in your head. And then one day, right on time, you are rudely woken up from this blissful dream.

Anyway, my Magic Bullet seems to have missed the target. My old companion has found my address again. I've dusted off the Oxygen tanks and put everything in easy reach.

-Dennis-

(fighting the good fight in my own little corner of hell)

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Where there is life, there is hope.
Where there is Oxygen, you must use proper caution.
So be safe, don't smoke while using O2. Kill the pain and not yourself.

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Melissa CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Don't give up! Posts: 7238 Central WI, USA Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #1 - Aug 14^th, 2010 at 12:40pm I am so very sorry Dennis. I am praying for the day when the beast comes knocking, all we need to do is get a shot and it's gone.
Back to top	Diseases can be our spiritual flat tires - disruptions in our lives that seem to be disasters at the time but end by redirecting our lives in a meaningful way. ~Bernie S. Siegel IP Logged

lorac CH.com Old Timer Offline Imagine Posts: 433 Tennessee Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #2 - Aug 14^th, 2010 at 12:48pm Hang in there Dennis. Love your title. chuckle chuckle. Glad your armed with the stuff. even if it is dusty!
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QnHeartMM CH.com Sponsor Offline I AM a Phoenix! Posts: 1783 San Diego, CA Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #3 - Aug 14^th, 2010 at 1:13pm Sorry to hear it's back Dennis. How long was your break? Besides the o2, do you have your prevents lined up?
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-johnny- CH.com Sponsor Offline theres no smoking on the dock Posts: 1642 fayette county ohio Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #4 - Aug 14^th, 2010 at 1:30pm hi dennis! uh... sorry to had to find this place but im glad your here. im a little over 2 1/2 ears remission myself. you still got your o2 stuff?
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Linda_Howell CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline Do not feed the Moderators Posts: 11927 Santa Maria, Ca. Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #5 - Aug 14^th, 2010 at 1:37pm Start the 12 steps now.
Back to top	Hurt people.....hurt people. Think about it. IP Logged

Brew CH.com Sponsor CH.com Alumnus Offline Posts: 14163	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #6 - Aug 14^th, 2010 at 1:43pm I hate it for ya, my friend.
Back to top	"I have been asked if I have changed in these past 25 years. No, I am the same. Only more so." --Ayn Rand IP Logged

DennisM1045

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One wave at a time!

Posts: 3437
Haverhill, Massachusetts, USA
Gender: male

Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead
Reply #7 - Aug 14^th, 2010 at 1:50pm

Thanks guys.

No prevents for me. I'm aborting them as they come along. That has worked well for the last few cycles. Though I do have a bottle of Verapamil to fall back on if this plan doesn't work out.

My O2 tank farm was full if dusty. I've got several Trex shot lying around if needed too. So far the O2 is winning the day.

-Dennis-

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Where there is life, there is hope.
Where there is Oxygen, you must use proper caution.
So be safe, don't smoke while using O2. Kill the pain and not yourself.

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Kevin_M

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withered branches grow
green again.

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Michigan, USA
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Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead
Reply #8 - Aug 14^th, 2010 at 3:40pm

DennisM1045 wrote on Aug 14^th, 2010 at 12:36pm:

... rudely woken up from this blissful dream.

From a world apart, something is waking me. No, I don't want to wake up, I'll just keep on... grasping this dream... sleeping... keep slee... Torn away, memory, where was that now, the groggy daze begins clearing...

Oh yeah, I have cluster headaches. Aaaaaand the acceptance settles in; the responsibility.

Just remembering.

You're in the right place, Den.

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Mosaicwench CH.com Sponsor Offline www.mosaicwench.com Posts: 3507 Near Milwaukee WI, USA Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #9 - Aug 14^th, 2010 at 4:44pm Aw Dennis, it's a pisser that it's back. We've kept the light on for you.
Back to top	“Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work.” ~Flaubert IP Logged

Guiseppi CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline San Diego to Florida 05-16-2011 Posts: 12063 SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA USA Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #10 - Aug 14^th, 2010 at 10:09pm Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression........Acceptance....My name is Joe....and damnit after 32 years I'm STILL a clusterhead. My cycle ends, yours starts, that just bites. Joe
Back to top	"Somebody had to say it" is usually a piss poor excuse to be mean. IP Logged

Lettucehead CH.com Old Timer Offline I am very blessed... Posts: 293 Iowa Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #11 - Aug 15^th, 2010 at 2:56am Hi Dennis! Welcome back! Sorry you're here... And, Joe, excellent reference!
Back to top	Listen, and understand. That terminator is out there. It can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear... 'The Terminator' AKA CH IP Logged

Kate in Oz CH.com Hall of Famer Offline Posts: 633 Australia Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #12 - Aug 15^th, 2010 at 7:58am Sorry to hear it's back. But at least you'll be armed and dangerous. Fight the good fight Hope it's a short cycle, Kate
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Darkmessiah CH.com Newbie Offline I Love CH.com! Posts: 9 South Africa Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #13 - Aug 15^th, 2010 at 8:07am Brew wrote on Aug 14^th, 2010 at 1:43pm: I hate it for ya, my friend. Ok help What are the 12 steps?
Back to top	Live life in the fast lane..... Don't regret the past...... Change the FUTURE!!! IP Logged

Guiseppi CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline San Diego to Florida 05-16-2011 Posts: 12063 SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA USA Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #14 - Aug 15^th, 2010 at 10:50am A humorous reference to the basic 12 step programs used in many recovery programs! (With NO slight meant at those who have used 12 step programs as their success rate is impressive, we just tend to poke fun at EVERYTHING here! ) Joe
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DennisM1045

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One wave at a time!

Posts: 3437
Haverhill, Massachusetts, USA
Gender: male

Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead
Reply #15 - Aug 15^th, 2010 at 11:23am

Darkmessiah wrote on Aug 15^th, 2010 at 8:07am:

Brew wrote on Aug 14^th, 2010 at 1:43pm:

I hate it for ya, my friend.

Ok help What are the 12 steps?

Just Linda's way of welcoming me home and reminding me that there is a price to pay for staying away Wink

Besides, I love a good toungue lashing Shocked

-Dennis-

Back to top

Where there is life, there is hope.
Where there is Oxygen, you must use proper caution.
So be safe, don't smoke while using O2. Kill the pain and not yourself.

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Langa CH.com Alumnus Offline So many donuts, such little time... Posts: 4754 x0\|\|USA\|usa\|0\|0\|NJ,New_Jersey Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #16 - Aug 15^th, 2010 at 12:36pm Hang in there Dennis.... Langa
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Linda_Howell

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Santa Maria, Ca.
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Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead
Reply #17 - Aug 15^th, 2010 at 3:04pm

ACTUALLY....my comment about starting the 12 steps was because of your thread title. "Hi, my name is Dennis and I am a..." It's in reference to what they say at the beginning of an AA meeting.

Quote:

Just Linda's way of welcoming me home and reminding me that there is a price to pay for staying away

But this works too Dennis. LOL Kiss

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Hurt people.....hurt people. Think about it.

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midwestbeth CH.com Sponsor Offline Posts: 1123 Edwardsville, IL Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #18 - Aug 16^th, 2010 at 12:15pm Sorry to hear the beast is back, Dennis. Hope the cycle is short. Beth
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Jeannie CH.com Sponsor Offline Live, Laugh, Love.... Posts: 2333 St Louis, Missouri Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #19 - Aug 16^th, 2010 at 12:29pm Thinking of you, Dennis. Jeannie
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jon019

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"Ya gotta believe!"

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USA
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Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead
Reply #20 - Aug 16^th, 2010 at 6:00pm

Heya Dennis...loved the clever thread title...much as we wish differently...this is a lifelong battle....one day at a time brother.

Missed your wit and wisdom...but figured there was a good reason we didn't hear from you...and that was satisfying enough. As Pat said...the light is always on...whenever....

And Kevin....I tend toward light verse with humor or poignancy....but that there caused me to suck in my breath...you've been in my head!

Best,

Jon

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The LARGE print giveth....and the small print taketh away. Tom Waits

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Charlie CH.com Alumnus Offline Happy to be here Posts: 18971 Jamestown, NY Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #21 - Aug 17^th, 2010 at 12:42am I'm sorry this horror had to revist. I am glad you know where to come however. Keep him off balance for us all. Charlie
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DennisM1045

CH.com Alumnus

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One wave at a time!

Posts: 3437
Haverhill, Massachusetts, USA
Gender: male

Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead
Reply #22 - Aug 17^th, 2010 at 8:54am

jon019 wrote on Aug 16^th, 2010 at 6:00pm:

figured there was a good reason we didn't hear from you

Just busy with life Jon.

We're marrying off another daughter this Fall. We had 70 people at the house for a Wedding Shower on the 7th.

It couldn't be something simple with just females oooing and awwing over gifts. They wanted a back yard BBQ with everyone. It was like a preview of the receiption.

It was a good time though and my last chance to inbibe some Sam Summer before the return of the beast. Yes, he showed up on Tusday the 11th.

This is 4 weddings in 4 years. They seem to be going down in order. I told Casey (#5) I need a break and if he mentioned the word Marriage I'd shoot him Grin

. Fortunately he's not serious with anyone Cool

-Dennis-

Back to top

Where there is life, there is hope.
Where there is Oxygen, you must use proper caution.
So be safe, don't smoke while using O2. Kill the pain and not yourself.

IP Logged

Guiseppi CH.com Moderator CH.com Alumnus Offline San Diego to Florida 05-16-2011 Posts: 12063 SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA USA Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #23 - Aug 17^th, 2010 at 10:12am *It couldn't be something simple with just females oooing and awwing over gifts. They wanted a back yard BBQ with everyone. It was like a preview of the receiption* Oh Dennis, you're so cute! The words "simple" and "wedding" are not even on the same page!!! Joe
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DennisM1045 CH.com Alumnus Offline One wave at a time! Posts: 3437 Haverhill, Massachusetts, USA Gender:	Re: Hi, my name is Dennis and I'm a clusterhead Reply #24 - Aug 17^th, 2010 at 10:28am Too true G-man. Too true... You'd think I know this by now -Dennis-
Back to top	Where there is life, there is hope. Where there is Oxygen, you must use proper caution. So be safe, don't smoke while using O2. Kill the pain and not yourself. IP Logged

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