Posted by Nancy (198.247.8.162) on July 17, 1999 at 02:06:58:
COOL TEST
.......................................................
Depending on how you ask the questions, you can
force the answer you seek!
Remember 43% of polls are wrong, the other 78%
are made up!
Don't jump to the answer, just scroll down.
Take this test mentally, don't write down your
answers, and don't shout them out.
1. Pick a number from 2 to 9. It can be 2 or it can be
9, or any number in between.
2. Take that number that you've chosen, and multiply
it by 9.
3. That should give you a two digit number. Take
those two digits and add them together.
4. Take the resulting number and subtract 5 from it.
5. Take that number and correspond it to the
alphabet, numbering the letters. A =1, B=2, C=3,
and so on.
6. Take your letter, and think of a country that begins
with that letter.
7. Take the last letter in the name of that country, and
think of an animal.
8. Now, take the last letter in the name of that animal,
and think of a color.
9. But remember, that there are no orange kangaroos
in Denmark.
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Don't show this to your wife or she will know the "secret" mens code.
WHAT MEN REALLY MEAN
"I'm going fishing."
Really means..."I'm going to drink myself dangerously
stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."
"It's a guy thing."
Really means...."There is no rational thought pattern
connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
"Can I help with dinner?"
Really means...."Why isn't it already on the table?"
"Uh huh," "Sure, honey," or "Yes, dear."
Really means....Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned
response.
"It would take too long to explain."
Really means..."I have no idea how it works.
"We're going to be late."
Really means...."Now I have a legitimate excuse to drive like a maniac."
"I was listening to you. It's just that I have things on my mind."
Really means...."I was wondering if that red-head over there is wearing a bra."
"Take a break, honey, you're working too hard."
Really means...."I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
"That's interesting, dear."
Really means...."Are you still talking?"
It's a really good movie."
Really means...."It's got guns, knives, fast cars, and
beautiful women."
"That's women's work."
Really means...."It's difficult, dirty, and thankless."
"You know how bad my memory is."
Really means.... "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop',the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the Vehicle Identification Numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
"I was just thinking about you, and got you these roses."
Really means.... "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
"Oh, don't fuss. I just cut myself, it's no big deal."
Really means.... "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit I'm hurt."
"Hey, I've got my reasons for what I'm doing."
Really means.... "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."
"I can't find it."
Really means.... "It didn't fall into my outstretched
hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"What did I do this time?"
Really means.... "What did you catch me at?"
"I heard you."
Really means.... "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."
"You know I could never love anyone else."
Really means.... "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
"You look terrific."
Really means.... "Oh, God, please don't try on one more outfit. I'm starving."
"I'm not lost. I know exactly where we are."
Really means.... "No one will ever see us alive again."
"We share the housework."
Really means.... "I make the messes, she cleans them up."
* * *
Q: What did one saggy boob say to the other saggy boob?
A: If we don't get some support soon, people are going to think we're nuts.
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Hugs and a smile again, Nancy