Posted by Riccardo Pentenero (188.8.131.52) on September 08, 1999 at 02:32:55:
In Reply to: I'm back from trip //jokes posted by Nancy on September 08, 1999 at 00:36:13:
Good jokes, then is up to me (i always confuse if US people say "Up to me" and British "Down to me" or viceversa.....
Aren't Kids Great?
The boss of a big company needed to call one of his
employees about an urgent problem with one of the main
computers. He dialed the employees home phone number and
was greeted with a child"s whispered, "Hello?". Feeling put
out at the inconvenience of having to talk to a youngster
the boss asked, "Is your Daddy home?"
"Yes," whispered the small voice.
"May I talk with him?" the man asked.
To the surprise of the boss, the small voice whispered,
Wanting to talk with an adult, the boss asked, "Is your
"Yes," came the answer.
"May I talk with her?"
Again, the small voice whispered, "No."
Knowing that it was not likely that a young child would be
left home alone, the boss decided he would just leave a
message with the person who should be there watching over
"Is there any one there besides you?" the boss asked the
"Yes," whispered the child, "a policeman."
Wondering what a cop would be doing at his employee's home,
the boss asked, "May I speak with the policeman?"
"No, he's busy," whispered the child.
"Busy doing what?" asked the boss.
"Talking to Daddy and Mommy and the Fireman" came the
Growing concerned and even worried as he heard what sounded
like a helicopter through the ear piece on the phone, the
boss asked, "What is that noise?"
"A hello-copper," answered the whispering voice.
"What is going on there?" asked the boss, now alarmed.
In an awed whispering voice the child answered, "The search
team just landed the hello-copper!"
Alarmed, concerned, and more than just a little frustrated,
the boss asked, "Why are they there?"
Still whispering, the young voice replied along with a
"They're looking for me!"
"we have not yet arrived at the future"
"Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons."
_Popular mechanics, forcasting the relentless march of science, 1949.
"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers"
_Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943.
"I have traveled the length and breadth of this country, and I can assure
you that data processing is a fad that won't last out the year."
_The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957.
"But what...is it good for?
_Engineer at Advanced Computing Systems, Division of IBM1968, commenting on
"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
_Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp.,
"This 'telephone'.. has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as
a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us."
_Western Union internal memo, 1876.
"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?"
_H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.
"I don't need a computer, I don't want a computer, I will never own a
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