Posted by Barbara D. (205.188.198.156) on September 29, 1999 at 06:25:58:
In Reply to: Memory Loss, Denial and Clusters posted by Bill McCuistion on September 29, 1999 at 03:20:04:
Bill,
I think some memory loss is normal - at least it is for me - but I'm old also. I'm chronic, but there are a lot of places that are just blank. I didn't realize it until I went back to work, but I've lost a few months - the disk is just clean - nothing. I'm in the process of filling in the blank spots now.
I don't know if it was the pain or the meds, but the memory of several months just ain't there. Sometimes I'll have a vague memory of something, but that's all. It should be embarrasing, but I can't do anything about it, so I just ask someone to fill in the blanks and hope they're telling me the truth.
The worst thing is in March, I picked up a check from my broker (for a pretty sizable amount) and I have no idea what I did with it). This week we finally got a stop payment on it and got it reissued. I don't remember anything about it. Thank goodness, my business partner did or I probably would have just lost it (and I don't think that would have been very smart). It was never deposited or cashed. Apparently I picked it up and did something (put it somewhere, threw it away or something, who knows?). I don't remember picking it up, but I signed for it, so I guess I did, but I don't even remember going over there. That's scary. This whole disease is scary.
I always said I didn't mind going crazy as long as I didn't know anything about it, but I really didn't mean it! Maybe this is just our way of blocking out the worst part of the pain.
So much for my psych. ramblings at 5 in the morning. Hope things get better by noon.
Hugs BD