Posted by Sara (130.111.152.125) on November 14, 1999 at 11:39:40:
In Reply to: Please Tell Me What Kind Of Migraine I Have posted by Jackie on July 14, 1999 at 00:21:38:
Dear Jackie,
I can't tell you how happy I was to read your
letter and see that there is someone out there
who understand the true pain of a migraine.
Of course, my heart went out to you because of
the intense pain you are paugued with but still,
I felt relief in knowing there is someone else out
there to relate to . I too am tired of hearing
people say, "Oh, you have a headache." No, I
don't have a "headache". There seems to be
little man living behind my right eye today,
pulling and pushing and poking at my eyeball
trying his damnest to push it out of my head.
There seems to be an army of these little demons
marching around and around my head. .. the pain
travels as the hours pass on the clock.
Every day. Every damn day of my life now I feel
this. I have pages and pages of journal enteries
filled with descriptions of this pain.
But you konw what I am feeling, so I do
not find it necessary ot explain.
I have been on countless prescriptions for
this, you as well? Each visit to the doctor
leaves me frusterated and helpless, hearing only
that we will "give this new med a try" and that
this is my fault. . .I cause this by stressing
myself out. Bullshit. I only stress myself out now
because I try so hard not to in fear of giving
myself a headache. You know what I mean? they tell me
I cause the headaches cause I stress myself
out. . .so in fear of another headache, I end up
stressing myself out in the process of trying not to. Does
that make sense? It's hard to explain.
I've tried everything over the counter...exedrin, zomig,
tylennol, advil, migraine face molds (like an ice pack)
and every other countless pill you can name. Then there
is the medicine cabinet full of nine or ten different
half empty prescription bottles. Nothing ever works. Nothing.
Right now I am on flurenol. The thing that is so hard
is they have yet to find something for me that is a
preventative med. Everything is "take as needed". Take the pills after the
pain has gotten to a certain level of intensity.
At eighteen years old I am fed up, frusterated and angry. I can't imagine what
it must be like to have four children and to have suffered for so long. What kinds of
things do you do for your pain? I noticed you said you only feel
the pain when coughing or moving too quickly which I have
never heard of. Still, it must be a little better...my
migraines are constant.
They last for days at a time. I wake in the
morning with the same headache I went to bed
with two days ago. What meds have you tried? You must be on
some type of prescription by now right? How does your family cope with this?
I left work early last night after the naseau from yet another migraine sent
me running to the ladies room several times. I was sweating and shaking and weak and in s
sooooooooooooooo much pain. I was afraid to blink
my eyes, in fear of my eye balls popping out of the sockets. I couldn't go in this morning, I was
up all night with a bag of frozen veggies
on my head. "A headache?" The manager asked. I wanted to shout through
the phone, "I wouldn't call in sick because of a headache!!!!" this is so much more
and I know you can understand that.
Any advice? What have the doctors told you? Is it your fault too, like me...
stressing myself out they say. I hate hearing that theory. If it is stress, isn't there some kind of
drug for that?
I am so frusterated and perhaps I have bored you with my
rambling. I am sorry, it was just a nice change of pace to find someone
who knows what I am feeling. Feel free to write any time...I would love to hear from you!
~ Sara