Divorcing my supporter

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Posted by John Bown ( on December 02, 1999 at 20:22:37:

This is it. She has done it. My wife of 24 years has committed an unspeakable act. Tonight I was unpacking the groceries. Lettuce, milk, beano, (I have a problem, you know) Centrum Silver (just turned 50) whoa, what is this, a new kind of breakfast cereal? Honey Nut CLUSTERS!! CLUSTERS!!!!! She bought something called CLUSTERS?????

Whoa folks... Is that insensitive or what? I know she has sat with me hundreds of times wringing out towels when they aren't hot enough and putting them under the steaming faucet again while I cuss at her. I know she has stayed home countless times from dates we have made then broken on our way out the door or even on our way down the road when the beast has called me and I have thanked her by saying "get the fuck out of my road; why the hell is this here- I've told you a thousand times I need to be able to get to this oxygen in a second...".

Who would think to make a breakfast cereal named "Clusters" anyway? What kind of sick, perverted mind would come up with that? The company is General Mills, and the address is General Offices, Minneapolis, Minnesota 55440. (rip, tear, snarf, chew) hrumpf.... well, umm,, they aren't too bad...

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