Heather, i'm italian!

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Posted by Riccardo ( on February 09, 2000 at 02:43:27:

In Reply to: A message from mom! posted by Heather and Elaine on February 08, 2000 at 16:54:36:

When I call you yesterday by phone, 2 things have made me mad at you!
First, why have you installed an echo device into phone that repeat my poor words after 2 seconds in my ear? tch tch tch I imagine that your mom tell you to do this!
Second, My written english is poor, but my spoken english is worse, and, at end, I understand only one spoken word in a group of 100.
Surely your mom also said you 'If Riccardo call, speak the more quick you can!' Ok I agree, but you have fired a Kalashnicov in my ear!
The next time I will call, PLEASE! speak slow and with simple words like these:
HI (5 sec pause)
I AM (5 sec pause)
HEATHER (10 sec pause to let me understand that you are NOT the HEATER in your bathroom)
YES (5 sec pause)
MOM IS (5 sec pause)
IN FANTASTIC (15 sec pause)
CONDITIONS (10 sec pause)
(a long pause to let me understand the phrase end)

WHY (5 sec pause)
THE HECK (5 sec pause)
YOU CALL (5 sec pause)
AT 3 IN THE MORNING? (10 sec pause) and a note! don't tell me 3 A.M. otherwise I surely understand TREE I AM , I will think to have made the wrong # and called Miss TREE!

Then, if you would say me something else not scheduled above, send me an E-mail before, then tell me:

OK (5 sec pause) (please not the sound oh KAY, otherwise another wrong #...!)
I WILL (5 sec pause) (same above NOT I'm Will!)
SEND (5 sec pause)
AN E-MAIL (5 sec pause)
EXPLAINING YOU (repeat 3 times with 5 sec pause, too much syllabes!)
WHAT I (5 sec pause)
WANT (5 sec pause and WANT please! NOT wanna, wan, w and other truncated words!)
TO TELL (5 sec pause)
YOU (15 sec pause)
>>>everything you want to say to me at your normal (normal?!?) speed <<< obviously be sure that I will not understand a word of what you will say, then feel free to shout everything you would say to an enemy, but you never have the hearth to say...
END-CALL (hang up)

More seriously, I'm so happy that your mom is in good condition (I never doubted on the CAPATOSTA power....). I only think that if they don't remove the catheter, she will ask for a 30 yard long, today..... but may be funny, you could use it as a remote control.....
A hug to you and all your family
Ciao Riccardo

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