Posted by chris j (220.127.116.11) on April 06, 2000 at 13:03:19:
In Reply to: I have suffered for over 20 years. posted by Richard D. Ebbs on April 06, 2000 at 10:39:20:
im there with you Richard, there are many of us there with you. Im going on the twenty year plan.
And yes we all have the suicidal thoughts. Family can be sympathetic but will never know the pain we endure. Does the pain slowly start off like a ice pick in the back of the neck, then works its way out the left eye. When I was young I even would wait for the progectile spurts of blood to come gushing out my eye,never did though. Then once it works its way out the eye its time to do the dance, I used to bang my head off the wall but now that I am wiser I just curl up into the fetal posision and kind of rock side to side. All you can do is wait for the season to end. That is your hope, your only hope, the painfree life. Dont give up, or the monster wins, and now you know we are out here for you, hope it cuts the edge a little.
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