cluster during a performance

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Posted by Barry ( on May 15, 2000 at 15:38:22:

so i'm a Ferengi at Star Trek: The Experience. and occasinoally we have to do outside PR work. well, the Infinity Broadcasting group bought out the attraciton for a convention party last week, and the aliens had to go to the Mandalay Bay casino/hotel, put them on the 8 buses, and ride with them back to the Hilton, entertaining them along the way. the Ferengi costume is tight, so there's nowhere to stash my Imitrex injector. no big deal, it's only an hour gig (famous last words...).

so it's just me and 50 people on the bus, and the air conditioning isn't working right. i'm in a foam mask and polyester, and the las vegas sun is beating down on me through crystal clear windows and a cloudless sky. as i'm boiling alive and at a loss for what to say to entertain these primates, the cluster comes on like a freight train, pounding and relentless.

blazing heat? fine. searing pain? no problem. having to smile and crack jokes and be a convincing alien on a bus with a shitty audience with all this other crap going on? insanity. and possibly the most difficult performance i've ever done.

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