The new Job complex: Clusters

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Posted by Dylan T. Kenny ( on May 24, 2000 at 11:18:48:

Hmm. As religious thought rises in me recently,
the twin demons of our times, migraines and Clusters,
strike me as a new suffering test on us ala Job.

Remember Job?

Satan wanted to test God and picked out Job. He said that everything that Job had God gave him, and Job would spite God if he took it all away. God, being omnipotent and all knowing looked into the future and knowing this was a sucker bet on Satan's part, (or so ceartain scroll's found recently in Vegas say.) accepted. Let Satan do horrible nasty things to Job. Job didnt do anything. Read that part again. Job was pious and holy and very close to God, and deserved more riches and gold and everything ( Three Beards! JACKPOT!) but what did Job get? He lost everything including his health. He got Hives.

But enough about Job. This isnt Quite a religious site (But if you have ever had a really long bad cluster, you know what that Quite means, even people who arent usually religious start asking God to let it stop then) Go search out Job on Google and see what you get...BTW, that's what brings me here was a search on Migraines and Lourdes...anyhoo...

The point is, that maybe, just maybe, Clusters are another trick by ole red bottom to test God and his creations:

"Hey Old Man. Look on your people now. Even the ones who are following just your kid are getting dangerously close to unraveling the secrets of your little creation."

God stroked his beard, thoughtfully. It was the new style in Heav'n to have no white, and it made HIM look a bit younger than his infinite years. Then again HE could look anyway HE wanted. "Yeah. I know. No matter how much I scramble thier towers this time Bable might happen. They went the other way again."

"Yes. Those microprocessors and Windows were a good one werent they? I'm glad ol Bill souled out to me"
Nicky said patting his pocket where a tiny little script of paper peeked out, on which God knew was written IOU 1 Soul William H. Gates III. I've got another one. It's basically the inverse of our last little bet. Let me let loose a simple but inisidious pair of plaugues on the Earth called Migraines and Cluster Headaches. People will hurt for almost no good reason and if they figure out why they have one, why then, they will then turn into the other one..."

"Yes! I like it. One of your better plans. If they dont come to me throught my son for relief, well then la te dah on them. Go on with you." God replied. Yes, let the people of earth deal with Satan for awhile, that was were this headache came from anyways.

Hmm. So I wonder. How much of this little tale could be as true as the tales we get from the bible? Think about it. As for me and mine we will serve the lord.
But there aint much I can do with these headache troubles, and even though I do ask God for help, I dont know if he is answering...

Dylan T. Kenny

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