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Posted by Russ ( on July 09, 2000 at 20:09:21:

In Reply to: Cluster Fluster??!!?? (long long long post) posted by Russ on July 09, 2000 at 05:05:39:

Somehow it does seem to help to come to this message board and find that someone has acknowledged your grief. MANY THANKS! Like someone else said recently, "I get more support here than with my co-workers where I have spent the past 20 years!@##@# During the beginning of this whole mess, I did take a week off while I was on the Prednisone "ROLLER COASTER" "MADHOUSE RIDE"! It's funny that I have read about most of the other peoples experience with Prednisone and they seem to only experience the long term bad side effects. I, however, instantly turn into a "werewolf" or "jekyl & Hyde" syndrome... My wife says that if I ever go on that crap again, she'll move to a hotel for the duration! Other than that she has been SUPER SUPPORT! That also helps one during times of "helplessnes" and anxiety! I am lucky there, as she has suffered from Migraines for the past 5 years (usually brought on during PMS), so she has a clue as to what I'm going through. I guess it's my turn to now understand a little better what she goes through when she says shut the door turn off the light and get me the "bucket" for a day at a time... We were both glad to finally get through all the tests and find them to be normal, but now what? My life is far from normal... I'm hoping that some of the anxiety will fade and the continuous cycle will be broken soon. People at work just don't get it... Once I came back to work from the week off, they assumed that I was totally normal. NOT! It's hard to have a meeting while you are rubbing your temple and forehead fighting a persistent "5". BUT YOU ALL KNOW THAT... I'm the pathetic new rookie here. But then I'd rather be demoted out of the sport than be escalated up to the Majors! LOL. The persistant Horners is what bugs me the most. I went to the gym and worked out on the stairmaster for 30 minutes to work up a good sweat. I then took a picture of myself to show the eyelid droop, unequal pupils, and the totally weird absence of ANY sweat on the right side of my face. The left side had sweat rolling down my eyebrows and down the side of my face. I took this picture to the Neurologist just for the heck of it and she said "Yep, that is pretty remarkable" Hard to dispute that, glad you brought it in. The entire picture looked like I had been worked over with a baseball bat! I guess I can save it for sometime when I need to show photos of a mugging.. LOL. It is strange that I don't have any other symptoms besides the HORNERS and PAIN! No nausea, no affected vision loss (thank god), no auras, no weakness, or other neurological deficits??? It's just scary to look in the mirror and see your pupils two different sizes! Can't help but keep worrying that something is wrong inside my brain??? The Docs keep telling me that I would have other symptoms if something serious was going on and the tests didn't show anything... So I guess I'll hang around here for awhile until things change. Who knows, maybe I can help someone while I'm here.. I hope so! Russ

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