Posted by Nancy (220.127.116.11) on September 20, 2000 at 10:39:33:
I wonder if you can figure this one out?!!
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs are roaming in the forest when they come across a lake.
The water was enticing and Snow White decides to take a bath. So she tells the Dwarfs to turn around while she is taking a bath in the lake.
The Dwarfs protest vehemently because they want to take a bath too.
Snow White relents and says "When I get into the water and you hear the splash, you can turn around."
Snow White undresses and as she is about to jump into the water, at that very moment, she is startled by frog who jumps into the water before she can.
The moment the Dwarfs hear the SPLASH, they turn around and see Snow White standing NAKED.
Now, given that this incident is an idea for a TV ad, what product is being advertised?
Come on now, this should be easy for a person of your background and mental powers.
If you can't figure it out just scroll down for the answer.
Here is one for you Simon!
An Irish girl went to London to work as a secretary and began sending home money and gifts to her parents. After a few years they asked her to come home for a visit, as her father was getting frail and elderly.
She pulled up to the family home in a Rolls Royce and stepped out wearing fur and diamonds.
As she walked into the house her father said 'Hmmm - they seem to be paying secretaries awfully well in London.'
The girl took his hands and said 'Dad - I've been meaning to tell you something for years but I didn't want to put it in a letter. I can't hide it from you any longer. I've become a prostitute.'
Her father gasped, put his hand on his heart and keeled over.
The doctor was called but the old man had clearly lost the will to live.
He was put to bed and the priest was called.
As the priest began to administer Extreme Unction, with the mother and daughter weeping and wailing, the old man muttered weakly "I'm a goner -
killed by my own daughter! Killed by the shame of what you've become!"
"Please forgive me" his daughter sobbed, "I only wanted to have nice things! I wanted to be able to send you money and the only way I could do it was by becoming a prostitute."
Brushing the priest aside, the old man sat bolt upright in bed, smiling.
"Did you say prostitute? That was a close one - I thought you said
Old one but good.
At age 4 . . . success is . . . not peeing in your pants.
At age 12 . . . success is . . . having friends.
At age 16 . . . success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 20 . . . success is . . . having sex.
At age 35 . . . success is . . . having money.
At age 50 . . . success is . . . having money.
At age 60 . . . success is . . . having sex.
At age 70 . . . success is . . . having a drivers license.
At age 75 . . . success is . . . having friends.
At age 80 . . . success is . . . not peeing in your pants
There it is... so slow down and enjoy the ride!
Stumpy and his wife Martha went to the state
fair every year. Every year Stumpy would say, "Martha, I'd like to ride
in that there airplane." And every year Martha would say, "I know Stumpy,
but that airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars."
One year Stumpy and Martha went to the fair and
Stumpy said, "Martha, I'm 71 years old. If I don't ride that airplane this year I may never get another chance." Martha replied, "Stumpy that there
airplane ride costs ten dollars, and ten dollars is ten dollars."
The pilot overheard them and said, "Folks, I'll
make you a deal. I'll take you both up for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and not say one word, I won't charge you, but if you say one word it's ten dollars."
Stumpy and Martha agreed and up they go. The
pilot does all kinds of twists and turns, rolls and dives, but not a word is heard. He does all his tricks over again, but still not a word.
They land and the pilot turns to Stumpy, "By
golly, I did everything I could think of to get you to yell out, but you didn't."
Stumpy replied, "Well, I was gonna say
something when Martha fell out, but ten dollars is ten dollars."
Everyone smiles in the same language,
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