Posted by Margi (161.184.81.207) on January 05, 2001 at 10:24:53:
(So why are you men reading this??)
PREPARING FOR THE YEARLY MAMMOGRAM
>Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, and even if they have had them before, there is fear. But there is no need to worry.
>By taking a few minutes each day for a week preceding the exam and doing the following practice exercises, you will be totally prepared for the test, and
>best of all, you can do these simple practice exercises right in your home.
>
>EXERCISE 1: Open your refrigerator door, and insert one breast between the
>door and the main box. Have one of your strongest friends slam the door shut
>as hard as possible and lean on the door for good measure. Hold that
>position for five seconds. Repeat in case the first time wasn't effective.
>
>EXERCISE 2: Visit your garage at 3 a.m. when the temperature of the cement
>floor is just perfect. Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on the
>floor sideways with one breast wedged under the rear tire of the car. Ask a
>friend to slowly back the car up until your breast is sufficiently flattened
>and chilled. Switch sides, and repeat for the other breast.
>
>EXERCISE 3: Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite
>a stranger into the room. Have the stranger press the bookends against
>either side of one of your breasts and smash the bookends together as hard
>as he/she can. Set an appointment with the stranger to meet next year to do
>it again.