OK, I reply with another....

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Posted by Riccardo ( on April 11, 2001 at 10:59:47:

In Reply to: Letter of Recommendation? posted by Margi on April 11, 2001 at 10:51:52:

Actual employees evaluations:

1. Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and shows signs of starting to dig.

2. I would not allow this man to breed.

3. Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.

4. This man has delusions of adequacy.

5. He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.

6. This employee should go far -- the sooner he starts, the better.

7. This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

8. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

9. Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't looking.

10. A room temperature I.Q.

11. A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.

12. A prime candidate for natural deselection.

13. Bright as Alaska in December.

14. One-celled organisms outscore him in I.Q. tests.

15. Donated his brain to science before he was quite finished using it.

16. Fell out of his family tree.

17. This man has two brains; one is lost and the other is out looking for it.

18. If brains were taxed, he would get a rebate.

19. If you gave him a penny for his thoughts, you would get change back.

20. If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.

21. It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.

22. One neuron short of a synapse.

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