Chinese Tortures :^)

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Posted by Charlie S ( on April 25, 2001 at 18:15:26:

A young man is wandering, lost, in a forest when he comes upon a small
house. Knocking on the door he is greeted by an ancient Chinese man
with a long gray beard.
"I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the

"Certainly," the Chinese man said, "but on one condition."
"If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter I will inflict upon you
the three worst Chinese Tortures known to man."

"OK," said the man and entered the house. Over dinner, the daughter
came down the stairs. She was young, beautiful and had a fantastic body.
was obviously attracted to the young man, as she couldn't keep her eyes
him during the meal. Remembering the old man's warning he ignored her and
went up to bed alone.

During the night he could bear it no longer and snuck
into her room for a night of passion. He was careful to keep everything
quiet so the old man wouldn't hear and, near dawn, he crept back to his
exhausted but happy. He woke to feel a pressure on his chest. Opening
his eyes he saw a large rock on his chest, with a note on it that read,
"Chinese Torture #1: Large rock on chest."

"Well, that's pretty crappy," he thought. 'If that's the best the old
man can do then I don't have much to worry about." He picked the boulder
up, walked over to the window and threw the boulder out. As he did so, he
noticed another note on it that read:
"Chinese Torture #2: Rock tied to left testicle."

In a panic he glanced down and saw that the rope was already
getting close to taut. Figuring that a few broken bones was better than
castration he, jumped out of the window after the boulder.
As he plummeted toward the ground he saw a large sign on the ground that
"Chinese Torture #3: Right testicle tied to bed post."

Smiles,- - -Charlie S :^)

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