Posted by Nancy on April 15, 1999 at 17:24:22:
One day, this man, Tony, died. When he was sent to be judged, he was told that he had committed a sin, and that he could not go to heaven right away.He asked what he did and God told him that he cheated on his income taxes, and that the only way he could get into heaven would be to sleep with a 500 pound, stupid, but ugly woman for the next five years and enjoy it.
Tony decided that this was a small price to pay for an eternity in heaven. So off he went with this enormous woman, pretending to be happy.
As he was walking along, he saw his friend Carlos up ahead. Carlos was with an even bigger, uglier woman than he was with. When he approached Carlos he asked him what was going on, and Carlos replied "I cheated on my income taxes and scammed the government out of a lot of money...even more
then you did." They both shook their heads in understanding and figured that as long as they have to be with these women, they might as well hang out together to help pass the time.
Now Tony, Carlos, and their two beastly women were walking along, minding their own business when Tony and Carlos could have sworn that they saw their friend Jon up ahead, only this man was with an absolutely drop dead gorgeous supermodel/ centerfold. Stunned, Tony and Carlos approached the man and in fact it was their friend Jon. They asked him how is he with this unbelievable goddess, while they were stuck with these god-awful women.Jon replied, "I have no idea, and I'm definitely not complaining.This has been absolutely the best time of my life, and I have five years of the best sex
any man could hope for to look forward to. There is only one thing that I can't seem to understand... after everytime we have sex, she rolls over and murmur's to herself,
"Damn income taxes!"
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Now Y'all remember --- No cheatin
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Fraud Warning!
WARNING! PLEASE READ IMMEDIATELY!
THIS IS SERIOUS! Well, maybe NOT?
If you get an envelope from a company called the
Internal Revenue Service," DO NOT OPEN IT!
This group operates a scam around this time
every year. Their letter claims that you owe
them money, which they will take and use to pay
for the operation of essential functions of the
United States government. This is untrue! The
money the IRS collects is used to fund various
other corporations which depend on subsidies
to stay in business.
This organization has ties to another shady outfit
called the Social Security Administration, who
claim to take money from your regular
paychecks and save it for your retirement. In
truth, the SSA uses the money to pay for the
same misguided corporate welfare the IRS
helps mastermind.
These scam artists have bilked honest,
hard working Americans out of billions of
dollars. Don't be among them!