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Posted by Charlie S (206.159.166.167) on July 22, 2001 at 06:11:01:

Dear Consumas:

It has come ta our attention dat just maybe a coupola
copies of the WINDOWS 98/BROOKLYN EDITION may have
accidentally bin shipped outsida Broooklyn. If ya got
one a dese, you may need some help understandin' da
commands.

Da Brooklyn edition may be recognized by da unique
openin' screen. It reads:

"WINDAS 98," wit a background picture of Grand Army
Plaza. When you starta da program, instead of da
usual "harpy, stringy" music, you hear da teme from
da Godfadda. It is also shipped wit a Sopranos
screen sava.

Please also note

Recycle Bin is labeled "Staten Island"
My Computer is called "My Friggin'Computa"
The Inbox is referred to as "Da Trunk"
Deleted Items are referred to as "Wacked," "Erased,"
"Wasted" or "Rubbed Out"
Dial up Networking is called "Da Bar"
Control Panel is known as the "Da Bosses"
Performin' an "illegal operation" is known as
"enhancin' the family business" and will actually
maximize da program instead of shuttin' it down.
Hard Drive is referred to as "Da BQE Rush Hour"
Instead of an error message........ yo gonna see a
"You ain't gonna friggin' believe dis!" message pops up.

CHANGES IN TERMINOLOGY IN DA BROOKLYN EDITION
OK...................Sure ting
Cancel...........Fugetaboutit
Reset.............Start Ova
Yes.................Yeah
No...................Nah
Find................Put a contract out on
Browse..........Get a looksee
Back...............U toin
Help................(Help ain't available - yous
don't need no stinkin'help)
Stop.................Knock it off
Start.................Move it!
Settings..........Here's d' Rules

Also note dat any voice recognition software run
on da BROOKLYN EDITION platform don't recognize da
letter "R."
Some programs and udder accessories dat are exclusive
to WINDAS 98:
Typa................A word processin'program
Printa...............Printer
Calculata..........Calculator
Solitare.............Seven Card Stud
We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you
received a copy of da BROOKLYN EDITION. You may return
it to Microsoft for a replacement version.

Yous got a problem wit dat?

What's it to ya?

Charlie S :^)





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