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Posted by Swtswede ( on October 02, 2001 at 01:30:26:

I'm 32 and had my first attack around the first of may, by June I had slit my wrist, fumbled with a gun, but couldnt concentrate enough to load it (Thank you God). My doctors think Im a drug crazed lunatic, even after witnessing an attack (or maybe because :-))Then one night, my husband (who was an abusive drunk)...well he thought (I guess) I didn't have enough to deal with, with the HA and all...he started to rough me up....and the HA was too bad for me to care. It drove him nuts that I was more scared of my HA than I was of him. Anyway, when the HA eased and I couldn't stop the bleeding (he had smashed a glass into my hand and cut an artery and two tendons)I begged him to take me to the hospital (he took my car keys, yanked out the phone, not to mention...completly controlled all my med's and would withhold...if I wasnt nice)the bleeding scared me, because despite the HA...I don't want to die.....So, when he locked me in my room, I crawled out the window........
I'm sorry. I can't finish...I thought it would be good for me to get it off my chest...but I can't.
Let me just finish with.....I still have the clusters (on my second week of this bout)but I handle them better now that I am away from the X, and have the outstanding support of my mom and my beautiful children. I still do alot of "why me's" now and then, and during an attack, I could make a sailor blush....but Im HAPPY (at least when Im not banging my head on the floor) :-)
Thank you for this site

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