I' m not giving up....

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Posted by August ( on January 05, 2002 at 05:51:26:

Why do people have to hurt each other? Our life is just a heartbeat in reality. Just a breath that we take in and out over and over. Why can't each breath be taken with love? Why can't each heartbeat be one remembering who we were created from and who we are going back to when we die? We have a life.... and it's so precious and each minute is one less in our life to use. Maybe you can't hear it ticking away...i can hear it . It's thunderous and it reminds me of all the times i've been in pain and takne it out on others . I'm so sorry :-( I love everyone here..everyone. I cna't think of one person i don't care about and I miss you :-(

I know my questions are pathetic and sound like i'm crazy. Maybe my thick skin has worn paper thin. I feel too much and i hurt when i read the things that have been posted. I'm trying to catch up on what i've missed so it stands out to me.

Why do we have to hurt each other? I'm crying right now because someone i love hurts just for knowing and loving me . I'm hurting because i miss all of y ou. I don't know what's next . I'm hurting insside and crying . Did i already say that? Fuck, i did...it's hard typing through tears. So please ignore me if need be.... but maybe we could stop and breathe and listen to our hearts. Maybe we could make all the pain go away there at least. We have enough pain in our heads. Don't we have enough pain already?

Maybe i'll lose computer now by posting. I'm not really caring right now. :-( In so many ways i've already given up . I do know this is the only family i've ever felt i had. Black squiggles or not, distance or not....when it reaches the heart all that disapears.

Lost in my corner and needing some light :-(

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