Posted by Elizabeth (126.96.36.199) on January 07, 2002 at 20:47:46:
1. I want to gain weight...put on at least thirty pounds!
2. Stop exercising...waste of time...
3. Read less.
4. Watch more television...
5. Procrastinate more....
6. Drink. Drink some more.
7. Take up a new habit: smoking!
8. Spend at least $1,000 per month on Godivas...
9. Spend more time at work.
10. Take a vacation to someplace important....like, to see the largest ball of twine.
11. Stop bringing lunch from home...should eat out more often!
12. Quit giving money and time to charity...what have they ever done for me?
13. Start being superstitious.
14. Have my car lowered and invest in a really loud stereo system...get the windows tinted...buy some fur for the dash.
15. Speak in a monotone voice and use only monosyllabic words.
16. Make the world a more beautiful place....tell people when they should have stayed home.
17. Work on improving my memory....be sure to include every single little incident in which others hurt me at all, whether intentionally or unintentionally...tell them everything they ever did to hurt me, in detail, and in triplicate!
18. Stop wasting $120 per year on oil changes....
19. Break someone's heart...just to see what it looks like on the inside...
20. Shower TWICE this year!
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