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   Author  Topic: I'd just love to be episodic  (Read 467 times)
notseinfeld
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I'd just love to be episodic
« on: Oct 10th, 2004, 12:19pm »
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At least then there'd be some comfort in knowing that there are other people that have it worse. As a bottom-of-the-barrel chronic there really doesn't seem to be anybody to pity.  
 
Been running 12 straight days of 3 hour morning smackers from K2-K5. Gotta suck on the friggin 02 the second a photon hits my eyes when I open them long enough to summon the strength to get downstairs to make coffee. Once that's brewing, it's back upstairs in attempts to ameliorate the intensity of pain that grew in the coffee-making trip. I can hear that little guy at the end of its percolating performance and after finding the biggest mug possible (to avoid yet other 'uncovered' trips) I fill 'er up and play 'she loves me, she loves me not' with alternating sipping and sucking.  
 
If the past is prologue I've got another 6 weeks of this continued hell before I return to the wonderful once every other day routine with lots of shadows in between. ( a rhyme!)  So it seems that being chronic is like never leaving the woods; only vascillating between the dense and sparse tree lines.  How the fuck do I get to the valley?  
 
Lots of things I wouldn't like to come back as in this world should reincarnation be true: My galpal X's liver; a pair of Rosie O'Donnell's jeans; the mirror in Paula Jone's house; and anyone unfortunate enough to be on this particular website in viewing distance of my rants.  
 
Thanks gang.
 
nots
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #1 on: Oct 10th, 2004, 1:30pm »
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a pair of Rosie O'Donnell's jeans
 WTF! Someday you may want to tell us what THAT'S about... I'm a chronic, too. I know what you're saying dude...but from what I see on this board, episodics may suffer from less overall HA hours but they seem to get higher kips. UndecidedI can count (on my two hands) the number of 7 and above in the four years of being chronic. (I can also count on my two hands the number of PF days in the last two years... Sad ) I find Neurontin helpful in keeping my pain on the back burner while I go on livin my life.
 
Oh wait ... I thought it said you WOULD want to come back as...oops Roll Eyes
« Last Edit: Oct 10th, 2004, 1:31pm by nani » IP Logged

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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #2 on: Oct 10th, 2004, 2:46pm »
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Never say never and don't ever ASSUME Roll Eyes
 
I know of many chronic ch sufferers who have found a successful management program that has kept them pain free for longer that a lot of "episodics"....  PLUS, chronic sufferers I've talked to do not get the "wave-like" symptoms associated with "episodics".  This translates to less hits at lower kips over a longer period of time.  I would never even attempt to weigh one against the other.  Grass is always greener....till ya git there. Tongue
 
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #3 on: Oct 10th, 2004, 2:54pm »
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on Oct 10th, 2004, 12:19pm, notseinfeld wrote:
At least then there'd be some comfort in knowing that there are other people that have it worse.

 
You would find comfort knowing others are in pain?
 
Thats fucking sad!!....really fucking sad.
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nani
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #4 on: Oct 10th, 2004, 4:00pm »
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Thats fucking sad!!....really fucking sad.

 
Not as sad as if he had wanted to come back as Rosie O'Donnel's jeans... Grin
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #5 on: Oct 10th, 2004, 4:07pm »
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I think it sucks period!! Episodic or Chronic just plain bites.
 
It is what it is!
 
Hope we all catch a break!
 
 
Eric
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #6 on: Oct 10th, 2004, 4:09pm »
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Eeek, guess that didn't come out right John. What I was driving at was kinda like self-dialogue wherin other folks have greater mountains to climb they need support, not whining. Was just having a mini-pity party feeling as if there was no one in the world who suffers worse and longer than me as I was taking short breaths between sentences. If you've read any of my other posts I hope it would be clear that I have all the empathy in the world for the people here and everywhere that suffer needlessly.  
 
Nana, Kim---right on both counts. It is rare that I get a >5 Kip and frankly don't even know what the waves are. Like you're pointing out, indeed it could always be worse---sometime it just doesn't *feel* that way.
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #7 on: Oct 10th, 2004, 4:35pm »
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Nots - thanks for not addressing my little faux pas about whose ass you wanted to come back attached to... Roll Eyes   Know what you're feeling... hug
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #8 on: Oct 10th, 2004, 10:10pm »
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on Oct 10th, 2004, 2:46pm, kimh wrote:
 I would never even attempt to weigh one against the other.  Grass is always greener....till ya git there. Tongue

 
    Wink
 
wiser words
 
 
Kevin M
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #9 on: Oct 10th, 2004, 10:25pm »
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Hey nots,  
 
How'd the date go? Manage to get through it without getting hit? What'd she say about the CH lit?
 
Sorry to hear you're getting hit so hard! If it helps(and I know it doesn't), so am I. Anywhere from 3-7 times a day. Maybe toward the holidays we'll both calm down a little. I'd still like to do coffee or (God forbid) drinks with you if we can work it out. Stay in touch.
 
Hope things turn around for you soon,
 
.................alley Cool
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #10 on: Oct 10th, 2004, 10:30pm »
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I hear ya, Nots dude
 
It all sucks!
 
................................jonny
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #11 on: Oct 11th, 2004, 2:27pm »
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I'd love to just not get hit at all, myself.
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #12 on: Oct 11th, 2004, 3:00pm »
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From your mouth to God's ear,  Thomas - I expect we all feel like that!  Well put.
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #13 on: Oct 12th, 2004, 3:06am »
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Hey nots, I'm chronic and I can relate, it seems like it would be better to find that valley.......but, I've been thinking about that lately and I've decided.  I'm used to what I've got, and I don't want to suffer the anxiety of sitting around, watching the summer come to a close, having not been hit in months, almost forgetting what it feels like, then.........wham!!!  The episodics wouldn't want to  be us either.  Jonny said it, "it all sucks."  I totally understand especially when us chronics are going through a particularly dense cycle within a constant cycle, our relief isn't no pain, just less.  
 
To quote Deepak Chopra, "Everything is as it should be."  
I hope he's right!!!  Hang in there!!!
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #14 on: Oct 12th, 2004, 7:56am »
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You think it's fun being episodic? Well, I hope you'll never have to know what it's like to a episodic-turned chronic... Sad
 
 
 
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #15 on: Oct 12th, 2004, 3:13pm »
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And I'd just love to have a magic wand.
A fucking CCH sufferer from far away. Grin
 
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #16 on: Oct 12th, 2004, 6:26pm »
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All this time I thought the chronics had it worse (knowing that chronic or episodic have it bad) but to think the chronics don't have the fun of a kip8 - 10....I say that tongue in cheek. Like has been said, we, all of us share a debilitating syndrome. Glad and sad you all are here.
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #17 on: Oct 12th, 2004, 9:07pm »
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i had no idea chronics get hit by such a low kip is this true? all of mine are usually a kip 7-8
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #18 on: Oct 12th, 2004, 11:11pm »
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I am chronic with kip 7-8, as many as 6 per day. Currently ending a pred stretch. Working in Verap with lithium. Never had much success in the past, but need to try something. 120 mg Verap, seems a little low? O2, and lots of other therapies don't seem to work all that well. Have to pace Imitrex inject., like all of us.
 
To answer the original post, I just take 1 day at a time, and am VERY thankful for a supportive partner, and    family. Not always supportive employers though. 8 years of this crap, chronic for last 3. I'm all ears, any suggestions I haven't thought of?  
 
Many heartfelt thanks, Many PF days for y'all. Bobbio.
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #19 on: Oct 13th, 2004, 12:21am »
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I get hit daily with Dozens of k3-6 HAs. I don't get the nighttime HAs very often. I'm just coming off a six week period of k 6-9s.(get times like that once or twice a year) There are some days when I think I would trade for just an episode of 9's and months of PF time. Except those k9 days, then I'm glad I'm chronic Undecided
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Re: I'd just love to be episodic
« Reply #20 on: Oct 13th, 2004, 1:23am »
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So it seems that being chronic is like never leaving the woods; only vascillating between the dense and sparse tree lines.  How the fuck do I get to the valley?

 
Great analogy.  Hang in there.  Don't call it a pity party....call it venting.  I think its healthy to do sometimes and NOTHING wrong with it.
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