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erica
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Cluster headaches and depression?
« on: Jan 27th, 2008, 9:40am » |
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Ever since I started getting headaches again the past two months I feel extremly emotional. nothing in my life is stressing me out- besides the headaches. And I find even when im not having a CH, I am very sad, almost depressed. I am a very happy and social person usually. but now I hardly want to do anything even when i feel okay. When im not hurting and upset over the physical pain, im upset over the emotional pain of the headaches. Nothing has ever gotten me down so easily. I feel very alone in that I feel everyone must think i am overreacting about the pain, so i exclude myself for fear of having another ch around people who just dont understand. and think im exaggerating...Reading some stories on here has reassured me that what im feeling is very real...I joined this board in hopes that it will help me through this low point with people who understand what it is like. have cluster headaches causing you to be depressed happened to anyone else?
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Patrick_A
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #1 on: Jan 27th, 2008, 9:53am » |
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Oh gosh yes! How could it not get ya a bit depressed? It has a tendency to ruin your social life until they go away. People who know you see that look come on your face and they dont know whether to comfort you or leave you alone. Rest assured, You will find many friends here, and many comforters.
I hope you find relief soon.
P_A
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barry_sword
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #2 on: Jan 27th, 2008, 10:25am » |
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Hi erica, welcome. I find CH's and depression run hand in hand with me while in cycle (I am getting a break right now)
I believe it has a lot to do with fighting the beast that just wears us down plus the lack of sleep. When out of cycle the depression is much less. I think we all get tired of trying to explain how bad CH's are to someone who has never had one.
You are with family now that understands what you are going through, you are not alone with this anymore.
Barry 
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sandie99
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #3 on: Jan 27th, 2008, 10:34am » |
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Erica,
I've been through cluster blues - as I refer depression which comes along ch - quite a few times during my ch years. But it also faded away. And I dare to say that you can overcome it as well!
If you want to talk about it sometime, feel free to send me instant message or emal anytime.
Lots of strength & pain free days your way,
Sanna
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Melissa
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #4 on: Jan 27th, 2008, 10:38am » |
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on Jan 27th, 2008, 10:25am, barry_sword wrote:| I believe it has a lot to do with fighting the beast that just wears us down plus the lack of sleep. When out of cycle the depression is much less. |
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I agree with this 110%!! For me, the lack of sleep is the #1 culprit. I have clinical depression w/anxiety disorder and can be off meds and on vitamin supplements to control it, BUT, when I don't get a full nights sleep, it really screws me up!
Also, the anxiety and fear of an impending attack can make a person depressed also. I've fortunately gotten over that part of when I'm in cycle, but many here go through the impending doom and the strain of their emotions just waiting for another attack to come.
We understand and you're not alone.
HUGS!!!
mel
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MJ
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #5 on: Jan 27th, 2008, 11:02am » |
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Its normal.
Sometimes you can treat the between hits with a natural stimulant, mood enhancer and it gets a little easier. things like ginseng, gotu kolu, very low dose ephedrine, Energy drinks, some vitamins and the like.
Be carefull if you do as some claim they trigger more CHs.
Most here understand what your saying. Its sometimes the toughest battle we fight.
It is critical to not let the CH get too much in the way of living. Hits happen. Life goes on. Hits happen again. Walk in the sun.
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DennisM1045
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #6 on: Jan 27th, 2008, 12:47pm » |
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Hi Erica,
I'm sorry to hear the beast is beating you down. We all know exactly what you are going through. It is natural to get a bit depressed. There is the physical battle, the fear of more pain and that feeling of being alone in your fight.
Well, the good news is that you've found us now. So the last one about being alone is no longer a problem for you. This site is filled with people that walk in your shoes every day. We're all here to share that fight and to lift each other up where we can.
Read everything, rant away and post all your questions my dear. We're all ears 
I hope you find some PF time soon.
-Dennis-
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Bob_Johnson
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #7 on: Jan 27th, 2008, 12:58pm » |
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"Pain vs. Suffering--research support", a message posted on 1/7/07.
SSRIs used to treat depression have gained a good track record but docs have been long aware of relapses when the med is stopped. Research has lead to a recommendation that the med be continued for up to 18-months after the depression has lifted because this reduces the rate of relapse. Parallel research revealed that this longer use of the meds allows our brain to "rewire" itself leading to better long term outcomes.
The article (available on the OUCH site, last line) "Pain vs. Suffering" is based on cognitive therapy. These forms of counseling/psychotherapy have been strongly supported by good research. Now some evidence is appearing that these therapies act like the SSRIs to stimulate our brains to "rewire", affording protection against strong anxiety conditions. Bottom line: looks like it may be possible to alter brain functioning to build in a permanent reduction of the anxiety which besets many folks with CH. While the gods may not have made a final pronouncement yet, experience with cognitive therapy, so far, really supports its use to treat anxiety & depression. While using "pain vs. suffering" takes time, commitment, and practice, it beats endless use of benzos, etc.
"“My brain is generating another obsessive thought. Don’t I know it is just some garbage thrown up by a faulty circuit?” After 10 weeks of mindfulness- based therapy, 12 out of 18 patients improved significantly. Before-and-after brain scans showed that activity in the orbital frontal cortex, the core of the OCD circuit, had fallen dramatically and in exactly the way that drugs effective against OCD affect the brain. Schwartz called it “self-directed neuroplasticity’ concluding that “the mind can change the brain?’ (TIME, 1/29/07. Major article on the human brain.) (OCD is classified as an anxiety disorder.)
http://www.ouch-us.org/chgeneral/painvsuffering.htm
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maryo
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #8 on: Jan 27th, 2008, 2:48pm » |
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Erica,
Women need to talk about their problems to feel better (remember Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus?). That's how we process, how we get to the next step, how we reconnect with our optimism and enthusiasm.
The world looks upon a woman with a headache as a hysterical female. Although cluster headaches is not officially designated as a disease, in my mind it is. It's hard on all of us, but especially on we women who need to be heard and understood in order to feel better.
This year, my 27th of this goddamned curse (not the montly one, the yearly one), I sent out a brief email to close friends explaining that I was suffering, I have long years of experimenting with possible remedies, have had many failures and some successes, and I justed needed caring thoughts. I think I was specific in requesting no advice, because you can bet your bottom dollar the first words out of their mouth is going to be, "Do you think it's stress?" I start to stay away from people because I'm hardened after decades of misunderstanding and misdiagnosis and I fear I'll belt someone I really care about who thinks they're being helpful.
One of these friends I emailed pointed out that this isn't a fatal disease or one that even causes lasting physical disability. So it lacks a certain urgency in people's minds. But to us who have "cluster headaches" and face the fact that there is no end (I love thinking about the Beast during my Golden Years), it's f....ing depressing. I don't think this is "depression" per se but a sense of hopelessness that may not need SSRI's or even a shrink but careful watching because in our low moments we have stinking thoughts.
If you think about it, to not feel emotional, stressed, upset, and misunderstood would be abnormal.
I was lucky in that my first husband was completely sympathetic and understanding, and even after we separated, I could call him at 0430 and say, please come get the kids ready and on the bus because I have a headache. And he'd drive 30 minutes to my (previouisly our) house and do that, show sympathy, and then be late to work. And my kids grew up with this scene and they are very very understanding, and that helps a lot too. My older son, now 22, was housesitting for me during a trip, and he spent time on the internet researching my pharmaceuticals and just brushing up on cluster headaches. Gotta love it!
Plus (I know this is getting long) I have only once had a doctor respond empathetically about clusters. Recently, a male doctor/on-call said, on the phone, "That sounds horrific." If he'd been in the same room I would've kissed him.
So, honey, connect with your true blues, and that includes all of us here.
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monty
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #9 on: Jan 27th, 2008, 3:32pm » |
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Cognitive-behavioral therapies should be a first line for anyone who suspects they have depressive patterns. The above advice about recognizing and escaping thought patterns is good. Thought patterns really can be self-reinforcing.
Clusters are also associated with many of the things implicated in depression and anxiety: a messed up HPA axis (hypothalamus-pituitary-adrenals), altered serotonin levels, altered serotonin receptors, etc. If the cognitive-behavioral approach doesn't work, pharmacotherapy might be worth considering.
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billlmack
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #10 on: Jan 28th, 2008, 11:22pm » |
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I'm sure no one look forward to having a cluster attack. The thought of going through extreme pain can wear on ones will. You're not alone
Some meds like Topamax can increase those feelings.
We do understand, so if understanding helps you, then your in the right place.
All you can do is keep on finding ways to fight it.
But no matter what; "FIGHT YOU MUST".
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erica
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #11 on: Jan 30th, 2008, 7:01am » |
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Thanks to everyone who replied. You are all great. It helped me more than you know. 
love,
erica
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Sueborhead
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #12 on: Jan 30th, 2008, 7:56am » |
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Thank you all for your messages - it helps me to know I am not alone. I am new to this board even though I have been suffering from these horrific things since I was 17 and am now almost 39. I just started another cycle January 13th. They seem to come every 1-1/2 years and the cycle lasts about 6 months. The hardest and most depressing part is that every cycle seems a little different- what works and what doesn't changes every time. My neurologist always starts me on 80 mg of Prednisone and then tapers down (this helps keep them away when on the high dose). She also starts me on verapamil (120 mg for 1 week then 240 the next week and finally 360 mg until further notice). I also take 120 mg of depakote. When a cluster hits, my husband gives me a shot of Imitrex which takes the headaches away usually within 10 minutes, however, they wipe me out. I am missing alot of work and am extremely depressed. I'm sure there are others out there like me - please help me or just talk - life absolutely sucks right now 
Sue
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artonio7
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #13 on: Jan 30th, 2008, 9:22am » |
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on Jan 27th, 2008, 12:47pm, DennisM1045 wrote:Hi Erica,
I'm sorry to hear the beast is beating you down. We all know exactly what you are going through. It is natural to get a bit depressed. There is the physical battle, the fear of more pain and that feeling of being alone in your fight.
Well, the good news is that you've found us now. So the last one about being alone is no longer a problem for you. This site is filled with people that walk in your shoes every day. We're all here to share that fight and to lift each other up where we can.
Read everything, rant away and post all your questions my dear. We're all ears
I hope you find some PF time soon.
-Dennis-
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Yep... what he said!
Erica, depression sucks... plain and simple... it sucks the life from your soul and it leaves all the colors of the rainbow looking like a pasty grey. While in the throws of depression it's difficult (but not impossible) to see beyond it. It makes your body hurt and then it leaves you feeling guilty and grief stricken for even suffering and being a "burden" on society, your friends and your family. The waves of dread that wash over one in depression are painful and can leave you depleted and emotionally paralyzed.
Have you ever had the flu? Do you remember how that felt? Awful i'll bet. Just as a flu passes with the proper care and treatment so to shall this pass. The advice given thus far in the responses were pretty much right on the money. Like any sickness depression needs to be treated... the trick is to find the combinations of treatments and therapies that work for you... In my observation and experience it seems to be very much like CH in as much as what is effective for some may not work for others. ( I also suffer from depression)
My advice to you... if your depression continues and is becoming clinical. See your doctor... get a good physical and if warranted find a good psychiatrist as well as a therapist. If you and the medical professionals decide to treat your depression with chemicals be sure to have your meds checked on a monthly basis for effectiveness. (sooner if you're having a bad response to the meds).
If you can find a psychiatrist and therapist who work together, that would be a plus as the three of you can monitor the effects of your medication. The cognitive therapy is essential in dealing with the depression. One tends to isolate them-self when depressed for many of the reasons you stated in your first post... that is not the thing to do... a support group is essential... this is a great support group, come back often and vent to your hearts content.
I pray that you find a way to feel better soon... welcome to the family.
with warm regards,
Tony
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kingsiren
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #14 on: Jan 31st, 2008, 4:37pm » |
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You are definately not alone, a week into every cycle I start to get really depressed and emotional. I'm a very sociable person and my friends are used to seeing me 5 or 6 days a week. When Im in cycle I tend to isolate at home, I don't want compan and I dont really want to talk to any of them about the pain, no matter how hard you try and explain they just can't concieve it and I always get paranoid thinking about them judging me, its just easier to avoid the situation for a few weeks.
It's pretty sick, just last week I had to turn down a few days of work because the cycle was pretty bad and a 20+ year friend who I work with (and actually lived with while in one of my 1st cycles) told another friend that I was just being lazy and irresponsible, I should take a few tylenol and deal with it. I wanted to drive to his house and stab him in his eyes with a rusty dull spoon and then jam said spoon into a light socket. I know it's just ignorance but it hurts when people that are supposed to care for you and support you still dont get it after all these years.
Our prayers are with you and now you have a place to come vent and share with people who understand exactly what you are dealing with.
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I have an ice pick being repeatedly stabbed through my eye, into my brain while 4160 Volts run through it as someone squeezes my eyeball. You get headaches buddy, I get the Beelzebub on Crystal Meth.
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maryo
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #15 on: Jan 31st, 2008, 10:57pm » |
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Quote:| I wanted to drive to his house and stab him in his eyes with a rusty dull spoon and then jam said spoon into a light socket. I know it's just ignorance but it hurts when people that are supposed to care for you and support you still dont get it after all these years. |
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That's pretty strong language but not in this world. It gave me a good laugh because it was a more writerly version of my thought, which is something along the lines of "strangle."
I am in nursing school and it was said today in class how important it is for people with significant diagnoses to attend a support group and that online support groups serve that function as well. They didn't mention that a lot of people have a rare disorder where an online support system is their only possibility. I'm sure there are many others here who remember life pre-CH.com. It was just another level of hell.
Erica, how are you doing?
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Linda_Howell
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Re: Cluster headaches and depression?
« Reply #16 on: Jan 31st, 2008, 11:18pm » |
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In my experience it would be out of the norm if you didn't go through a depression with CH.
Once you're out of cycle, you'll return to your normal chipper, laughing self.. Don't be so hard on yourself.
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