Hi Guys,
I'm relatively new to the boards, but not to cluster headaches. I've been supporting my fiancee for the last 10 years, he has suffered for 25 years. The last few years have been tough to say the least, he has been chronic and had little relief from preventatives or abortives as well as suffering from Raynauds, Restless legs syndrome and a still undiagnosed rare systemic infection. The Local hospital wont treat him for the cluster's as it is mainly staffed by resident's who have no knowledge and prefer to treat him like a drug addict. Our Gp has told us not to bother going to the hospital and tries to prescribe all the med's so I can care for him at home without medical intervention. Without being arrogant, I do a bloody good job! I'm his carer, his nurse, his supporter, his advocate, I'm constantly educating us and the GP, on top of that I'm his best friend and would do anything for him not to have to suffer! I'm also the provider as he has been unable to work for close to 2 years. We have no support from his family and as most of you would know, friends tend to have limited patience and understanding.
We have two beautiful daughter's who are 6 and 8, they are my first priority and are wonderful children, our youngest started school this year and has had some difficulties settling in. She mentioned to her teacher that dad was sick and he had headaches, the teacher asked me about his condition, so thinking I was doing the right thing I took a copy of the " colleagues letter" in to her so she could be informed, but she has been very strange towards me and the girls ever since.. Both girls have had to have the last 2 weeks off school for chest infections. I took them to the doctor's and got antibiotics and a doctors certificate, I was going to drop the doctor's certificate off at the school when they returned on Monday, but I didn't get the chance. I have just received a phone call from The Department Of Children's Services, who had received a complaint that I'm a negligent parent due to the girls having the time off school and being put in an environment where one of the parent's was so ill. I was on the phone for 45 minutes explaining why the girls were absent, the medical status and condition suffered and that the allegations made are incorrect. It was the school principle who made the allegations without even investigating why the girls were absent! The DOCS representative said she was closing the case due to no evidence, how ever if any other complaints were lodged against us, then the girl's will be taken into care. I have never ever had anyone question my ability to raise or care for our girls, in fact I receive comments all the time from family, friends and random acquaintances, even strangers that the girls are very well behaved lovely children, my reply is always the same "I'm very lucky to have two such wonderful children". The reply from others is nearly always the same too, that "its not a matter of just having wonderful kids, it's clear that your doing a good job raising them". I've spoken to my family and friend's about the allegations and they have all told me that they are totally untrue and will support me, however is necessary and that I'm doing a fantastic job as a mother. But I feel like my heart has been torn at, I'm devastated that anyone would make such horrible untrue allegations against me and jeopardise my children's future, our family's future!
I'm doing my best as a Mother and a supporter, the girl's and Cory always come first. My ability and effort is always 100%, yes I get very tired, yes I get run down just like everyone else who has so much to deal with, but to get kicked whilst already on low reserves like this, has really hurt.
Regards Shell