Howdy! Have been reading for  several days and just mostly saying "Hello!" and thanks to all those who have posted so much great information.

My son has not been diagnosed, but I am still trying to find all the info I can for him. He is in college in another state.

He first had terrible headaches on one side, with accompanying "bloody" looking, copiously weeping eye, in March 2008, right around the first day of spring. They lasted about 30 minutes each and were gone in a month. He had had a car wreck the year before with separated shoulder and was told it was related. The headaches disappeared in about a month, during which he had a few different kinds of physical therapy aimed at helping his shoulder.

The headaches are back this spring, right around the first day of spring again. They come at the same time every day, with blood red, weeping eye. There are a couple of twists.

I hadn't heard of cluster headaches until some medication he was taking helped his headaches when they hit agaiin this spring (edited this to be less blabby). Through a series of events, he discovered that Ativan helped the headaches.

He went back to the doctor a few days ago and she started him on Maxalt. He doesn't want to take the Ativan for fear of dependence, and the Maxalt seems to be helping a little.

What I wonder about: I have been with him during these headaches, and they are not as bad as what I have now seen on Youtube videos posted of people with cluster headaches. I wonder if this is because he was on the Ativan this time when the cycle started. I didn't see much of him when he had them in 2008, but the times I did see him with one, they were worse than they are this time, but still not as bad as what the videos show. Are there "degrees"? I read the KIP scale, and I can't speak for him.

All of which leads me to why I'm writing... he doesn't want to talk too much about the headaches. Because of his medical history, I think he probably thinks I am overly hypochondriacal and he downplays anything that is ever wrong with him. Thus, I'm partly looking for a place to just say without fear, "I'm worried!" Scared because my son has a problem with which I can't help, and because I don't want to push, unsure how to help from afar except to just keep being there if/when he does want any help I might be able to give. Naturally, I want to, now that I have read about various things, want to get him to a good doctor/headache specialist (he is in a small town with only GP's), but he'll not go on his own and I certainly can't make him. Just feel a little helpless. And I know if I were there during a headache, as I was last week, there is nothing he wants done for him while he is having one, either. He had headaches before I left and did at least agree to a doc appointment, which he went to after I left (and she gave him the Maxalt prescription).

So... if you actually read all this... thanks for listening.

Hi Mom,   It is an almost universal feeling of not wanting ANYONE around us when we are in the throes of a cluster headache, so please don't take that personally.  I will do almost anything to get away to a private place..even in front of my husband or family.

Please encourage him to get a firm diagnosis.  After that the more educated you are about cause and treatment options, the more you can help him get some relief.  If you talk to him in an understanding way, letting him in on what you've learned I don't think he will feel you are over-bearing or a hypochondriac.

There ARE degrees of pain and not every headache will be a 10. You are a great Mom for signing on here and for trying to make sense of what's going on for your son.   There are many wonderful supporters here with Christy (above) being one.  Please stick around and they will help you through this.

Linda

Quote:


And there, my dear, are the two most important things a supporter does! The third is being there for them, and helping when they let you.

God Bless,

Christy