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Posted by Todd ( on April 14, 2000 at 17:49:26:

In Reply to: In light of the darkness.... posted by Carl D on April 14, 2000 at 14:32:39:

Hi Carl-

As always, you said a great deal, and I'm not referring to the length of your post. I'd like to take a shot at responding to a few of your points.

I'm 46. Turning 40 was a bit of a bummer, but I didn't mind 30 at all. Now that I'm in a position to look back, I wouldn't want to be 30 again for anything. Okay, having the cute girls in stores refer to me as "Sir" isn't the best feeling in the world, but my ego needs an occasional deflating.

I've had none of the challenges you've had in your life. My parents were and remain great. I surpassed my career expectations by the time I was 35. Had the new cars, big house, expensive suits, etc.

Then I blew it. Not CH, the big ME. Lost it all. Spent a few years and earned much of it back. Just finalized my divorce, and the house is about to be sold. I'll be going back to a much more modest lifestyle, and you know what?

I'm going to LOVE it!

I have a nice job making a modest salary. About 1/3 of what I used to earn, and I love it.

I'm helping a friend set up a website. Knew nothing about doing that until a couple of months ago, and it's taking longer than I would like, but I love it.

So why wouldn't I want to be 30 again and "have it all"?

Because I've finally grown up enough to realize what 'it all' truly is.

It's the friends....not the possessions.

It's the feeling of satisfaction that I get, not the salary.

It's the support I find here.

"I could have missed the pain, but I'd have had to miss the dance" [G. Brooks]

I've told you this before, but it bears repeating:

"I can play the notes, but I cannot make the music." [Charles Emerson Winchester, the Third]

As soon as my divorce settlement is finished, I'll have an extra computer. Nothing fancy, but it's a serviceable 586, two small hard drives, cdrom, 14" monitor, 33.6 modem. Runs Windows 95 (not enough oommph for W98) and has Office97 installed. If you want it, it's yours.

I'll cover the packing and shipping. Just one have to promise to use it to do something for yourself. Make the music. Write the songs. Write the plays, poems, novels. Open a typing business like Tracy. Learn html and start a webdesign business. Go to and post a profile. Write jokes and send them to Dennis Miller.

Age is just a number. As for me, I'm
"Old enough to know better,
Too damn young to care"


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