i am a tired mom...


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Posted by Jacque (66.22.165.42) on February 09, 2001 at 14:31:00:

Worry is a bad thing, it can tear you up inside. What a week it has been for daniel. and WHAT GUILT i have right this very minute! Daniel has been so sick from the amounts of ibuprofen he took. it ripped his stomach lining up, acid took care of the esophagus. Yesterday was the worst yet. I was oh so close to taking him to the emergency room. my husband (his dad) and i decided that if he got sick one more time that was it, in he goes. well, wrong to tell daniel, he held it in cause he did not want to go to the hospital mainly because he has been thru SOOOO much testing for these #*&)($#&*#* HAs that he HATES the doctors... i cant blame him.

he got a bag and a half of ivs this a.m. (after crying) poor almost 15 year young man cry in front of doc and mom... BUT it made he feel great! gave him that boost he needed.

i pretty much was a wild woman in the docs officet this a.m. almost to the point of pulling my hair out. The nerve of the nurse to tell me she was gonna work him in! UGH! ok sure then let him just sit in the waiting and puke acid! no prob! Well, i got a phone call before we left home and they told me they would have a room for him READY & WAITING! the receptionist (a friend of mine) escorted daniel to the surgical room as soon as we arrived.!! what service. i was not a happy mom and they knew it... i mean how many days, hmmm 6 now, and not better yet! oh i was so upset. i love my doc but i was an emotional wreck when he got in there! he brought in a second consult doc to review daniels history since july. daniel liked what he did and said. HAs and stomach problem. He perscribed carafate (sp?) for the healing of the stomach and esophagus! BOUT TIME FOR HEAVENS SAKE.. i mean this is what i had been saying ALL FREAKIN week! and what did the doc on call give him but an anti-nausea med OH MY! i am just crazy you guys! dont they EVER LISTEN!>>> NOW, hold onto your seats. and dont get upset... the 2nd doc perscribed a beta blocker and midrin for the onset of HA's... WHY didnt i speak up. I had already talked to him about CPH and the indocine! WHY didnt he listen! He called his HAs, sit now, MIGRAINES! let me just join you and beat my head into the walls! i sunk so low. i just wanted to cry. well i did ask for nerve pills, i cant handle all this. 38 years old and i think i am losing it. i CANNOT stand to see my kids in pain NONE AT ALL!
i mentioned the condition and the med and in one ear and out the other. i suppose cause he never mentioned anymore about what i said? am i stupid or something. do i really need to find another doc??? why cant they just listen.

daniel told them the ibu was working some, we go from one evil to an additional evil. maybe the indocine is too strong for him, i mean if he cant handle the ibu, maybe he cant handle this med???? i dont know, i am tired of guessing, just tired. mentally exhausted with worry and concern. he went to bed with a HA and asked for med but i was afraid to give him anything. offered the icepak, no he didnt want it. so he pushed in on his temple right in the soft spot and hard too. his way of relieving some of the pain.

I see a long long long road ahead of us. we will try this med after daniel gets back from a band trip next week, he is SO excited. i hope he is well for it.

Thank you all for the personal emails they are all simply TREMENDOUS! I will do my best to repspond to each of you! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU and an ENDLESS THANK YOU!

i am tired, really tired.

wishing you a blessing of healing!
jacque




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