I want to die

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Posted by Lana ( on January 25, 2002 at 13:21:37:

I was born in Russia. I have been here for the past 11 years. I don't have anyone in this country. I though I had friends, but I was wrong. It's another story. One year ago I broke up with someone I loved very much. We were together for two years. Since then I fell very sad and lonely all the time. I started to drink to kill my pain. Now, a year later, I can't stop drinking. I am afraid, I became an alcoholic. Alone, depressed and drunk. I tried to seek help, but wasn't successful. I am very attractive person inside and out. Now, looking at the mirror I cannot recognize myself. I have no tomorrow. I cannot go back home, it's too late, and I don't have anything or anybody to live for. I am thinking about dying a lot. I just don't know the easiest and painless ways to do it. I cannot talk about it to anyone; I am too embarrassed. I don't know what to do.....

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